Speaking in Thumbs
A Psychiatrist Decodes Your Relationship Texts So You Don't Have To
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By:
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Mimi Winsberg
About this listen
An essential look at the love language of texts, helping you decipher the personalities of online daters, the subtle signals from your romantic partner, and the red flags hiding in plain sight.
"Don't even think of swiping right again until you read this book.” (Christie Tate, author of Group)
When it comes to modern relationships, our thumbs do the talking. We swipe right into a stranger's life, flirt inside text bubbles, spill our hearts onto the screen, use emojis to convey desire, frustration, rage. Where once we pored over love letters, now we obsess over response times, or wonder why the three-dot ellipsis came . . . and went.
Nobody knows this better than Dr. Mimi Winsberg. A Harvard- and Stanford-trained psychiatrist, she cofounded a behavioral health startup while serving as resident psychiatrist at Facebook. Her work frequently finds her at the intersection of Big Data and Big Dating. Like all of us, Winsberg has been handed a smartphone accompanied by the urgent plea: "What does this mean?" Unlike all of us, she knows the answer. She is a text whisperer.
Speaking in Thumbs is a lively and indispensable guide to interpreting our most important medium of communication. Drawing from of-the-moment research and a treasure trove of real-life online dating chats, including her own, Winsberg helps you see past the surface and into the heart of the matter. What are the hallmarks of healthy attachment? How do we recognize deception? How can we draw out that important-but-sensitive piece of information—Do you want kids? Do you use drugs? Are you seeing someone else?—without sending a potential partner heading for the hills?
Insightful, timely, and impossible to put down, Speaking in Thumbs is an irresistible guide to the language of love. With wit and compassion, Winsberg empowers you to find and maintain real connection by reading between the lines.
©2022 Mimi Winsberg (P)2022 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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Love Talk
- Speak Each Other's Language Like You Never Have Before
- By: Dr. Les Parrott, Dr. Leslie Parrott
- Narrated by: Dr. Leslie Parrott, Dr. Les Parrott
- Length: 2 hrs and 39 mins
- Abridged
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A deep yet simple guide to revolutionizing the romance-building communication every thriving marriage needs. Love Talk is like no other communication book you've ever listened to. The fruit of years of research by two foremost relationship experts (who also happen to be husband and wife), this book forges a new path to the heart of loving conversation. You'll begin by identifying your security need and determining your personal communication style.
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Should Purchase the Book for Assessment Passcode
- By Terassa on 12-29-10
By: Dr. Les Parrott, and others
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
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Super You
- Release Your Inner Superhero
- By: Emily Gordon
- Narrated by: Emily Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Superheroes don't start from glorious beginnings. Their origins are almost always marked by traumatic events that leave them helpless and scared. Batman witnessed his parents' murder. Superman was sent away from his dying planet with no one to guide him as he grew up. Orphaned Catwoman was forced to steal food to survive on the streets of Gotham. What makes these superheroes super is their determination to not be defined by helplessness. They embrace their origins, their flaws, and their mistakes and strive every day to become the best versions of themselves.
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A wonderful book filled with empathy and humanity.
- By Vincent on 10-06-15
By: Emily Gordon
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The Secret Lives of Introverts
- Inside Our Hidden World
- By: Jenn Granneman
- Narrated by: Susie Berneis
- Length: 7 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Is there a hidden part of you that no one else sees? Do you have a vivid inner world of thoughts and emotions that your peers and loved ones can't seem to access? Have you ever been told you're too quiet, shy, boring, or awkward? Are your habits and comfort zones questioned by a society that doesn't seem to get you? If so, you might be an introvert. On behalf of those who have long been misunderstood, rejected, or ignored, fellow introvert Jenn Granneman writes a compassionate vindication.
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Unnecessary voices
- By Adrienne Warg on 09-13-19
By: Jenn Granneman
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I Want This to Work
- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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The Introvert's Way
- Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World
- By: Sophia Dembling
- Narrated by: Rose Itzcovitz
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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This clever and pithy audiobook challenges introverts to take ownership of their personalities...with quiet strength. Sophia Dembling asserts that the introvert’s lifestyle is not "wrong" or lacking, as society or extroverts would have us believe. Through a combination of personal insights and psychology, The Introvert’s Way helps and encourages introverts to embrace their nature, to respect traits they may have been ashamed of and reframe them as assets.
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Common Sense Fluff
- By James on 06-17-15
By: Sophia Dembling
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Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts
- Seven Questions to Ask Before - and After - You Marry
- By: Les Parrott, Leslie Parrott
- Narrated by: Les Parrott, Leslie Parrott
- Length: 4 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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More than a million couples can't be wrong! And with this updated edition of their award-winning book, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott help you launch lifelong love like never before. This is more than an audiobook - it's an experience. Get ready for deeper intimacy with the best friend you'll ever have. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, in more than 15 languages, is the most widely used marriage prep tool in the world.
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basically just a long advertisement
- By J. Sullivan on 07-06-16
By: Les Parrott, and others
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Men Chase, Women Choose
- The Neuroscience of Meeting, Dating, Losing Your Mind, and Finding True Love
- By: Dawn Maslar
- Narrated by: Suzanne Elise Freeman
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Men Chase, Women Choose is the first book to offer cutting-edge research that explains how the brain works when two people first meet, start to date, fall in love, and then move into real long-term love. Maslar's unique approach brings together the latest and most relevant neurological, physiological, and biochemical research on the science of love while incorporating stories and examples of composite characters based on participants of her popular classes and seminars.
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Disappointed
- By Kittenheels on 11-18-18
By: Dawn Maslar
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The Game of Desire
- 5 Surprising Secrets to Dating with Dominance - and Getting What You Want
- By: Shannon Boodram
- Narrated by: Shannon Boodram
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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For younger generations, dating is a complicated mystery. Apps like Tinder and Bumble are supposed to foster connection but instead serve as a reminder of how painfully single we are. Certified sexologist and intimacy coach Shan Boodram - the most sought-after sex educator on the internet - is about to change all that. In this essential how-to guide, she addresses the realities of life today - when the rules of love and attraction are fluid - and teaches a group of young women how to become master daters in just 60 days.
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Hey it’s me...you
- By Shan Boody on 09-25-19
By: Shannon Boodram
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He's Just Not Your Type (And That's a Good Thing)
- How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It
- By: Andrea Syrtash
- Narrated by: Andrea Syrtash
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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A relationship expert and dating columnist shares her counterintuitive approach to lasting love: encouraging women to date their "non-types". After years of dating, many women fall into relationship ruts. As serial daters, they are attracted to the same type of man time and again. Clearly something's not working. But the problem is not that he's just not that into them - the reality is he's just not their type.
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Amazing Insight
- By Maria M on 02-10-19
By: Andrea Syrtash
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Bad Advice
- How to Survive and Thrive in an Age of Bullshit
- By: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Narrated by: Dr. Venus Nicolino
- Length: 5 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In Bad Advice, relationship expert Dr. Venus Nicolino - aka Dr. V - takes a blowtorch to the shrink-wrapped “feel good” BS that passes for self-help these days. Smart and irreverent, Dr. V fuses the brains and insight of a nerdy PhD with the heart of a doting Italian mother and the artful profanity of a Philly trucker. Dr. V’s signature combination of humor, hard science, and heart make Bad Advice an iconoclastic course correction like no other. Bad Advice is a fiercely sharp wake-up call that tackles some of self-help’s most damaging truisms.
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Not my cup of tea.
- By ocean22 on 05-18-19
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The Art of Connection
- 7 Relationship-Building Skills Every Leader Needs Now
- By: Michael J. Gelb
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 7 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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These days, many of us find it easier to avoid face-to-face contact in favor of technological shortcuts. Why take the trouble to meet someone in person when we can simply send an email or a text? But as Michael Gelb argues in this compelling book, the meaningful relationships that come from real interaction are the basis of success. In The Art of Connection, Gelb offers listeners seven methods of developing better rapport in their professional and personal lives.
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Packed with powerful principles.
- By Jade/Clinton Phillips on 01-27-18
By: Michael J. Gelb
What listeners say about Speaking in Thumbs
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Amazon Customer
- 03-27-24
Widely Applicable
The phenomena described go past the medium of dating apps and texts to a deep conversation about the intentional communication work we must do to maintain relationships.
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- neal katyal
- 02-12-22
Entertaining!
This engaging audiobook by the brilliant Mirene Winsberg titillates, educates and teaches. Personal anecdotes weaved seamlessly with research ( and literature)
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1 person found this helpful