The Man Who Lied to his Laptop
What Machines Teach Us About Human Relationships
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Narrated by:
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Sean Pratt
About this listen
Startling insights into persuasion, trust, empathy, and teamwork, based on how we treat our computers....
The driver was insistent: “A woman should not be giving directions.” Despite the customer-service rep’s reassurance that the navigation system in his car wasn’t actually a woman - just a computer with a female voice - the driver (and many others like him) refused to listen. There was only one person for BMW to call for help: Clifford Nass, one of the world’s leading experts on how people interact with technology.
After two decades of studying problems like BMW’s GPS system, Microsoft’s Clippy (the most hated animated character of all time), and online evaluations that led people to lie to their laptops, Nass has developed a powerful theory: Our brains can’t fundamentally distinguish between interacting with people and interacting with devices. We will “protect” a computer’s feelings, feel flattered by a brown-nosing piece of software, and even do favors for technology that has been “nice” to us. All without even realizing it.
Nass has found that the most powerful strategies for working with people can be learned from watching what succeeds and fails in technology interfaces. If a computer can make friends, build teams, and calm powerful emotions, so can any of us.
Nass’s studies reveal:
- Mixing criticism with praise - a popular tactic for managers - is a destructive method of evaluation.
- Opposites don’t attract - except when one gradually changes to become more like the other.
- Flattery works - even when the recipient knows it’s flattery.
- Team-building exercises don’t build teams - but the right T-shirt can.
- Misery loves company - but only if the company is miserable, too.
Nass’s discoveries push the boundaries of both psychology and technology and provide nothing less than a new blueprint for successful human relationships.
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- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Everyone recognizes leaders with "presence." They stand out for their seemingly innate ability to command attention and inspire commitment. But what is this secret quality they exude, exactly? Executive and CEO coach Kristi Hedges demystifies this elusive trait, revealing that leadership presence is the intersection of outward influencing skills and internal mental conditioning. Using her I-Presence model, the author shows how anyone-regardless of position or personality-can strengthen their impact.
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Useful Information, Robotic Presentation
- By Jennifer L. Sullivan on 04-22-15
By: Kristi Hedges
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Ha!
- The Science of When We Laugh and Why
- By: Scott Weems
- Narrated by: Kalen Allmandinger
- Length: 7 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Humor, like pornography, is famously difficult to define. We know it when we see it, but is there a way to figure out what we really find funnyand why? In this fascinating investigation into the science of humor and laughter, cognitive neuroscientist Scott Weems uncovers what’s happening in our heads when we giggle, guffaw, or double over with laughter. While we typically think of humor in terms of jokes or comic timing, in Ha! Weems proposes a provocative new model.
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Good place to start in the study of humor
- By Amazon Customer on 05-26-17
By: Scott Weems
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The Art of Connection
- 7 Relationship-Building Skills Every Leader Needs Now
- By: Michael J. Gelb
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 7 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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These days, many of us find it easier to avoid face-to-face contact in favor of technological shortcuts. Why take the trouble to meet someone in person when we can simply send an email or a text? But as Michael Gelb argues in this compelling book, the meaningful relationships that come from real interaction are the basis of success. In The Art of Connection, Gelb offers listeners seven methods of developing better rapport in their professional and personal lives.
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Packed with powerful principles.
- By Jade/Clinton Phillips on 01-27-18
By: Michael J. Gelb
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The Leading Brain
- Powerful Science-Based Strategies for Achieving Peak Performance
- By: Friederike Fabritius, Hans W. Hagemann
- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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There's a revolution taking place that most businesses are still unaware of. The understanding of how our brains work has radically shifted, exploding long-held myths about our everyday cognitive performance and fundamentally changing the way we engage and succeed in the workplace. Combining their expertise in both neuropsychology and management consulting, neuropsychologist Friederike Fabritius and leadership expert Dr. Hans W. Hagemann present simple yet powerful strategies.
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Understand your brain for a better life!
- By Khalid Sul on 02-23-18
By: Friederike Fabritius, and others
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Focus
- Use Different Ways of Seeing the World for Success and Influence
- By: Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D., E. Tory Higgins PhD
- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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We all want to experience pleasure and avoid pain. But there are really two kinds of pleasure and pain that motivate everything we do. If you are promotion-focused, you want to advance and avoid missed opportunities. If you are prevention-focused, you want to minimize losses and keep things working. And as Tory Higgins has found in his groundbreaking research, if you understand how people focus, you have the power to motivate yourself and everyone around you.
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Pain / Pleasure
- By Serena K. on 02-13-17
By: Heidi Grant Halvorson Ph.D., and others
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Friend and Foe
- When to Cooperate, When to Compete, and How to Succeed at Both
- By: Adam D. Galinsky, Maurice E. Schweitzer
- Narrated by: Tom Perkins
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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In Friend and Foe, researchers Galinsky and Schweitzer explain why this debate misses the mark. Rather than being hardwired to compete or cooperate, humans have evolved to do both. It is only by learning how to strike the right balance between these two forces that we can improve our long-term relationships and get more of what we want.
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Unexpected
- By Garron Rose on 01-05-16
By: Adam D. Galinsky, and others
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Emotional Intelligence for Project Managers
- The People Skills You Need to Achieve Outstanding Results, 2nd Edition
- By: Anthony Mersino PMP
- Narrated by: Ramon De Ocampo
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Research indicates that emotional intelligence (EI) accounts for an astonishing 70-80 percent of management success. Technical expertise just isn't enough anymore: Project managers need strong interpersonal skills and the ability to recognize emotional cues in order to lead their teams to success. Emotional Intelligence for Project Managers introduces listeners to all facets of EI and shows how emotions can be leveraged to meet project goals.
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Fantastic Book!
- By Anonymous User on 04-09-21
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Thanks for the Feedback
- The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well
- By: Sheila Heen, Douglas Stone
- Narrated by: Sheila Heen, Douglas Stone
- Length: 9 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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The coauthors of the New York Times best-selling Difficult Conversations take on the toughest topic of all: How we see ourselves. Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen have spent the past 15 years working with corporations, nonprofits, governments, and families to determine what helps us learn and what gets in our way. In Thanks for the Feedback, they explain why receiving feedback is so crucial yet so challenging. They blend the latest insights from neuroscience and psychology with practical, hard-headed advice.
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Poor narration ruins yet another good read
- By WordNerd on 08-25-14
By: Sheila Heen, and others
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Compelling People
- The Hidden Qualities That Make Us Influential
- By: John Neffinger, Matthew Kohut
- Narrated by: Tim Andres Pabon
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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You will never look at people the same way again - including yourself - after this lively look at how we make character judgments. Drawing on cutting-edge social science research as well as their own work with Fortune 500 executives, members of Congress, and Nobel Prize winners, authors Matt Kohut and John Neffinger demystify the process we use to size each other up.
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Misleading Title.
- By don on 09-16-13
By: John Neffinger, and others
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Commit to Win
- How to Harness the Four Elements of Commitment to Reach Your Goals
- By: Heidi Reeder PhD
- Narrated by: Heidi Reeder PhD
- Length: 5 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you need besides motivation and willpower? In Commit to Win, Heidi Reeder, PhD, unpacks over forty years of research by psychologists and economists to show that the key to reaching any goal, whether it’s to hit the gym more often or to finally quit that dead-end job, isn’t motivation, willpower, or determination. It’s commitment. Busting the myths most of us believe about commitment, Reeder shows that it all comes down to four variables.
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Practical, but misses passion
- By ANDRÉ on 11-07-14
By: Heidi Reeder PhD
What listeners say about The Man Who Lied to his Laptop
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Creig
- 09-10-12
Finally, a Good "Why We Behave as We Do" Book!
You're probably here because you'd like a really good book on human behavior - specifically, why we think, feel, act and react the way we do, especially in social interactions. You know that the reasons we are attracted to some people and ideas, and repelled by others, aren't always clear, and in fact are often a complete mystery. If you're anything like me, you've read "The Tipping Point" and "Blink," maybe even "On Second Thought," "I Live in the Future," "The Invisible Gorilla," or the dozens of other offerings that promise to reveal your brain's perceptual errors, and your hidden motivation and those of others, the blind spots in your experience of other people and everyday life - all that cool stuff that will finally have you saying "Ah-HA!" But no matter what the reviews on Amazon or the New York Times (or all those gushing testimonials) say, when you finish, you feel a bit "cheated," oddly dry, like you weren't really provided with useful insights.
You weren't. But take heart, because here is a book that delivers! Clifford Nass, Stanford professor for the past 26 years, wanted to conduct social science experiments in human interactions and reactions to various common everyday scenarios, but he wanted to overcome the problem of the "confederate" - the "planted" person in the experiment, who all too often can skew the results by his or her own biases, unconscious facial expressions or other unintentional behavior. Then he had a brilliant insight: he noticed how antagonistic people were to Microsoft's infamous "Clippy," the animated paper clip "helper" that would pop up when one was in the middle of word-processing. He realized that people react to interactive computers with the same attitudes and emotions that they do to fellow human beings, and computers were the perfect "confederates," since they could perform exactly the same with every person and in every situation.
So he and co-author Corina Yen, his colleague from mechanical engineering, together with various graduate students (and many computers!), began devising experiments, the astonishing results of which are in this book. There are some genuine eye-openers here. To begin, just why did people hate "Clippy" so much? But it gets more practical: why do most businesses, large and small, fail abysmally at performance reviews and "team-building" exercises? And what would be EFFECTIVE ways to do these things? Why do you find one movie reviewer (or authority on anything, for that matter) much more likeable and engaging, yet find another, less likeable authority more believable and trustworthy? What is the REAL reason a car salesman gets you to agree to his terms, while thinking they are yours, when you know in advance their entrenched reputation for slick tactics? (You haven't heard it explained like this before!) And so much more!
Sean Pratt's narration is measured, "comfortably slow," with frequent brief pauses - but never in an annoying way. In fact, it is the perfect reading pace for absorbing the fascinating contents of this book.
If you are a frustrated "student of human behavior," skip the many other books on the subject (or box them for your next yard sale) and get this one!
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2 people found this helpful
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- Roy
- 10-19-10
Human/Technology Interface
This is another volume available from Audible providing insight into human/technology interface. In this volume, Clifford Nass aptly reports results of his own research and that of others to shed light on the human condtion. There is food for thought to any thoughtful person hoping to understand what is currently taking place technologically and what it might mean for society and human behavior. It is well written and wonderfully read by Sean Pratt. There is something here for everyone with an interest.
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6 people found this helpful
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- Joshua Kim
- 06-10-12
'The Man Who Lied to His Laptop' &Yelled @ His LMS
One of the things you will learn from The Man Who Lied to His Laptop is that being critical will make you sound smarter. Write a critical book review, and the review will be taken more seriously. This helped me understand why I've been feeling less than adequate in liking (and recommending) so many of the books I read (including this one). Reviewers who are not critical are viewed as less competent, hence we get more critical book reviews.
I was very happy to learn that the prolific Dr. Nass is a sociologist (Princeton 1986). I suffered moments of professional jealousy to learn that Nass is one of those academics who combine insane publishing productivity (3 books and over 125 research papers), with a busy and lucrative consulting career on human / computer interfaces with companies ranging from Microsoft to Toyota to BMW to Dell. Professional success in academia is not not distributed normally (would a Pareto distribution describe accurately describe the academic productivity?).
The Man Who Lied to His Laptop takes as its content many of the experiments and consulting gigs that Nass has run. Nass' central insight, the one he has built his career around, is that people treat computers like people. Substitute a computer for a person, have a real person interact with the computer, and learn lessons about the ways in which people behave and make decisions.
One experiment from the book that sticks in my mind was an investigation of "expertise."
Nass took a two TV sets, labelled one of them with a sign "News Specialist." People who watched newscasts on the "News Specialist" TV found those newscasts to be more convincing, better reported, and of higher quality than people who watched the same newscasts on the "generalist" TVs. It's good to be labelled a specialist or an expert in a subject.
This is a good book to read if you are in educational technology. The book has helped me understand how students and professors will view the learning technologies that we offer for teaching and learning, and ways in which we can communicate about these technologies when something goes wrong (and it always does). Recommended if you work at the intersection of technology and people.
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2 people found this helpful
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- None of your damn business
- 08-30-15
Fascinating & Solid addition to his other work
I first read Nass in grad school, and its been the basis for much of my work in the field of User Experience design.
If you have an interest in human computer interface design, or just want a better understanding of the in-grained social dynamics that make people tic, check this book out.
It can be a little dry at times, but worth it.
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- Joseph B.
- 05-09-19
Instantly a new favorite
Amazing book with amazing narrator. This book is critical reading in my opinion. Give it a listen.
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- Nitin Khanwalkar
- 05-25-17
Good content but not presentation
The book failed to keep the listener engaged. It could have been presented better. The energy was missing
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