Travelers to Unimaginable Lands
Stories of Dementia, the Caregiver, and the Human Brain
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Narrated by:
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Holly Linneman
About this listen
These compelling case histories meld science and storytelling to illuminate the complex relationship between the mind of someone with dementia and the mind of the person caring for them.
“This book will forever change the way we see people with dementia disorders—and the people who care for them.”—Lori Gottlieb, author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
After getting a master’s degree in clinical psychology, Dasha Kiper became the live-in caregiver for a Holocaust survivor with Alzheimer’s disease. For a year, she endured the emotional strain of looking after a person whose condition disrupts the rules of time, order, and continuity. Inspired by her own experience and her work counseling caregivers in the subsequent decade, Kiper offers an entirely new way to understand the symbiotic relationship between patients and those tending to them. Her book is the first to examine how the workings of the “healthy” brain prevent us from adapting to and truly understanding the cognitively impaired one.
In these poignant but unsentimental stories of parents and children, husbands and wives, Kiper explores the existential dilemmas created by this disease: A man believes his wife is an impostor. A woman’s imaginary friendships drive a wedge between herself and her devoted husband. Another woman’s childhood trauma emerges to torment her son. A man’s sudden Catholic piety provokes his wife.
Why is taking care of a family member with dementia so difficult? Why do caregivers succumb to behaviors—arguing, blaming, insisting, taking symptoms personally—they know are counterproductive? Exploring the healthy brain’s intuitions and proclivities, Travelers to Unimaginable Lands reveals the neurological obstacles to caregiving, enumerating not only the terrible pressures the disease exerts on our closest relationships but offering solace and perspective as well.
Cover art credit: © 2022 C. Herscovici / Artists Rights Society (ARS), New York
©2023 Dasha Kiper (P)2023 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Kiper’s work is deeply moving and often surprising. Through case studies both tragic and hauntingly relatable, she provides scientific grounding for what the beleaguered caregivers go through. With understanding comes the permission for, and perhaps a chance at, self-forgiveness.” —The Wall Street Journal
“Kiper . . . evinces a capaciousness of sympathy and understanding for Alzheimer’s patients and (especially) their caregivers. . . . For the frustrated caregiver, trapped in a vicious psychodynamic that is dehumanizing to both parties, this may provide some valuable solace.” —The American Scholar
“An elegant, empathetic, immensely informative, and insightful primer for caregivers as they try to navigate the fragmented, skewed world of the cognitively impaired.” —Psychology Today
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In Controlling People, best-selling author Patricia Evans tackles the "controlling personality" and reveals how and why these people try to run other people's lives. She also explains the compulsion that makes them continue this behavior - even as they alienate others and often lose those they love. Should you ever find yourself in the thrall of someone close to you, Controlling People is here to give you the wisdom, power, and comfort you need to be a stronger, happier, and more independent person.
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EXTRAORDINARY
- By Rob on 02-27-14
By: Patricia Evans
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How to Validate People
- Listen and Hear Better to Form Deep Connections Fast (Master Your Communication and Social Skills)
- By: Ian Tuhovsky
- Narrated by: Randy Streu
- Length: 2 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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If you want relations that bring joy, fulfilment, and peace into your life. Then you’re looking at the right book. Most people have a hard time nurturing long-term, meaningful relationships. You’re exposed to new people daily at work, at the gym, or even at the supermarket. Despite this, less than one in ten interactions end up flourishing into a friendship.
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Very little how to. Misleading title
- By Amazon Customer on 01-10-24
By: Ian Tuhovsky
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To Have and to Hold
- Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma
- By: Molly Millwood
- Narrated by: Molly Millwood
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood. When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of well-being.
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Pretty good
- By C Sandell on 03-07-21
By: Molly Millwood
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Highly Intuitive People
- 7 Right-Brain Traits to Change the Lives of Intuitive-Sensitive People
- By: Heidi Sawyer
- Narrated by: Heidi Sawyer
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you struggle with small talk and prefer deep conversation? Are you extremely sensitive to other people's moods? Are you exhausted after being in busy places? If you've answered "yes" to any of the above questions, you may be a Highly Intuitive Person: someone who is especially sensitive to the energy of others. Highly Intuitive People, also known as Intuitive-Sensitives, are a refined group of sensitive people who are said to make up 15-20 per cent of the population.
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Wow!
- By Raubo on 07-01-22
By: Heidi Sawyer
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The Family Crucible
- The Intense Experience of Family Therapy
- By: Augustus Y. Napier PhD, Carl A. Whitaker MD - contributor
- Narrated by: Derek Shoales
- Length: 10 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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This extraordinary book presents scenarios of one family's therapy experience and explains what underlies each encounter. You will discover the general patterns that are common to all families - stress, polarization and escalation, scapegoating, triangulation, blaming, and the diffusion of identity - and you will gain a vivid understanding of the intriguing field of family therapy.
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Family therapy
- By BossDiva on 12-16-21
By: Augustus Y. Napier PhD, and others
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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Why Smart People Hurt
- A Guide for the Bright, the Sensitive, and the Creative
- By: Eric Maisel
- Narrated by: Seth Podowitz
- Length: 5 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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The challenges smart and creative people encounter - from scientific researchers and genius award winners to best-selling novelists, Broadway actors, high-powered attorneys, and academics - often include anxiety, overthinking, mania, sadness, and despair. In Why Smart People Hurt, natural psychology specialist and creativity coach Dr. Eric Maisel draws on his many years of work with the best and the brightest to pinpoint these often devastating challenges and offer solutions based on the groundbreaking principles and practices of natural psychology.
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Stunningly Unintelligent
- By john burke on 05-22-21
By: Eric Maisel
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How to Be Sad
- Everything I’ve Learned About Getting Happier by Being Sad
- By: Helen Russell
- Narrated by: Helen Russell
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Helen Russell has researched sadness from the inside out for her entire life. Her earliest memory is of the day her sister died. Her parents divorced soon after, and her mother didn’t receive the help she needed to grieve. Coping with her own emotional turmoil — including struggles with body image and infertility — she’s endured professional and personal setbacks as well as relationships that have imploded in truly spectacular ways. Even the things that brought her the greatest joy — like eventually becoming a parent — are fraught with challenges.
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More an self biography
- By Jaime Murillo on 04-27-24
By: Helen Russell
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Boundaries: Where You End and I Begin
- How to Recognize and Set Healthy Boundaries
- By: Anne Katherine MA
- Narrated by: Pam Ward
- Length: 6 hrs
- Unabridged
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Have you recently walked away from a date or a conversation feeling uncomfortable or violated? Are you looking for ways to set limits with your spouse, kids, parents, or boss? This essential guide to setting and respecting boundaries is for anyone wanting to better understand themselves and others. Just as a cut in our skin causes pain and injury, a breach of any of our physical, emotional, or sexual boundaries can be very harmful to our bodies and minds.
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Not exactly for tailored for the Male reader
- By Matt on 04-26-22
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How to Make Good Things Happen
- Know Your Brain, Enhance Your Life
- By: Marian Rojas Estapé
- Narrated by: Marisol Ramirez
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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An empowering journey through the mechanisms of the mind from one of the world’s leading mental health experts.
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it's just ok
- By Serafin Zuniga on 01-18-24
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What If This Is Heaven?
- By: Anita Moorjani
- Narrated by: Anita Moorjani
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Following her near-death experience as shared in the New York Times best-seller Dying to Be Me, Anita Moorjani knows well the truths that exist beyond common knowledge and acceptance. The clarity she has gained has led her to further understand who she was born to be. Part of that truth has involved contemplating the cultural myths infused into our everyday lives. Passed down from generation to generation, these myths are pervasive and influential.
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Excellent Follow-up to Dying to Be Me
- By Gillian Culff on 06-19-19
By: Anita Moorjani
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
- By: Sherrie Eldridge
- Narrated by: Rosemary Benson
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
- By stephen blackwell on 07-19-24
By: Sherrie Eldridge
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Trapped in the Mirror
- Adult Children of Narcissists in Their Struggle for Self
- By: Elan Golomb
- Narrated by: Angela Brazil
- Length: 11 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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The difficulties experienced by adult children of narcissists can manifest themselves in many ways - for example, physical self-loathing that takes the form of overeating, anorexia, or bulimia; a self-destructive streak that causes poor job performance and rocky personal relationships; or a struggle with the self that is perpetuated in the adult's interaction with his or her own children. These dilemmas are both common and correctable, Elan Golomb tells us.
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Convoluted
- By Caligirl on 08-25-17
By: Elan Golomb
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Women Who Think Too Much
- How to Break Free of Overthinking and Reclaim Your Life
- By: Susan Nolen-Hoeksema
- Narrated by: Sheryl Bernstein
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
- Abridged
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Overall
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Performance
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It's not a surprise that our fast-paced, overly analytical culture is pushing people - especially women - to spend countless hours thinking about negative ideas, feelings, and experiences. Renowned psychologist Dr. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema calls this "overthinking". Her groundbreaking research shows that an increasing number of women - more than half of those in her extensive study - are doing it too much and too often, hindering their ability to lead a satisfying life.
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Generic tools for overcoming overthinking
- By letlet on 01-09-19
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Almost six million Americans—about one in every ten people over the age of sixty-five—have Alzheimer’s disease or related dementias, and this number is projected to more than double by 2050. What is it like to live with and amid this increasingly prevalent condition—an affliction that some fear more than death? In My Father’s Brain, the distinguished physician and author Sandeep Jauhar sets his father’s descent into Alzheimer’s alongside his own journey toward understanding this disease and how it might best be coped with, if not cured.
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Finished in one sitting
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The Dementia Caregiver’s Survival Guide is here to offer a lifeline to caregivers, providing practical advice and emotional support to help you cope with the complexities of dementia care. This survival guide offers a road map, empowering caregivers to understand the disease, manage difficult symptoms, and cope with financial challenges, patient aggression, depression, and much more.
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Good overview with practical help
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In The Brain That Changes Itself, Norman Doidge described the most important breakthrough in our understanding of the brain in 400 years: the discovery that the brain can change its own structure and function in response to mental experience - what we call neuroplasticity. His revolutionary new book shows, for the first time, how the amazing process of neuroplastic healing really works. It describes natural, noninvasive avenues into the brain provided by the forms of energy around us.
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Extremely helpful understanding my TBI.
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Excellent resource and reinforcement...
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Almost six million Americans—about one in every ten people over the age of sixty-five—have Alzheimer’s disease or related dementias, and this number is projected to more than double by 2050. What is it like to live with and amid this increasingly prevalent condition—an affliction that some fear more than death? In My Father’s Brain, the distinguished physician and author Sandeep Jauhar sets his father’s descent into Alzheimer’s alongside his own journey toward understanding this disease and how it might best be coped with, if not cured.
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What listeners say about Travelers to Unimaginable Lands
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Sunshine Kesey
- 08-12-24
A Godsend
This book articulates the mysterious dynamics around caring for a parent with dementia. The author sines a light on the inner struggles of the caregiver.
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- mcnultytx
- 09-06-23
A must-read for family careguvers
This book was informative and heartfelt; validating, and enlightening for family caregivers, and respectful of their loved ones.
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- Kathleen Tresser
- 09-17-23
Valuable listening
This book is immensely valuable, and full of insight. I recommend it without reservation. It is supportive of both the person with dementia, and the caregiver.
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- AmazonCustomer
- 03-22-23
So relevant and helpful for my situation
I loved this. Very relevant to what I am currently experiencing and have been for the past 7years.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Rachael
- 11-02-24
The author is so accurate in her observations and recommendations.
The content is on point and the advice excellent especially for caregivers. The examples she provided were so accurate.
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- Western
- 08-08-23
Personal enrichment
Very good and informative description of personal struggles with caring for loved ones who have dementia
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- Susan J. Guiswite
- 03-09-24
Validation, finally!
As a caregiver I totally related to the stories told. I finally found validation for all my emotions related to caregiving. Now I understand why. Although, I’m not fully sure what I should be doing differently.
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- P. Friel
- 05-14-23
Best book for dementia caregivers I have read
I have been a dementia caregiver for my wife, who has early onset dementia, for over 10 years. After 8 years caring for her at home, I ran out of gas, and admitted her to an excellent memory care facility. I visit her just about every day. Travels to Unimaginable Lands is the best book for caregivers that I’ve read. It is sophisticated but understandable, explaining many things, such as why it is so exhausting to try to communicate with someone with dementia. Highly recommended.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Duane
- 06-05-23
Instant Classic
Specifically for family caregivers, this book shows how Alzheimer's affects the person and the caregiver. With stories and scientific studies, we understand why a person with Alzheimer's acts as they do and why we as caregivers have trouble reconciling their behavior. Encouraged with infinite forgiveness, we are supported in our journey to recognize that the person is still who they are ... however diminished.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Robert A May
- 12-08-23
Helpful and insightful
I think this book is important for caregivers and family of patients with dementia. Daria explains what is happening in various scenarios common to these patients. She also sheds light on the reason our healthy brains respond the way they do. Excellent production!
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