When Friendship Hurts
How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You
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Narrated by:
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Tanya Eby
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By:
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Jan Yager Ph.D.
About this listen
We’ve all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships. Finally there is help.
In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them - or end them. In this straightforward, illuminating book filled with dozens of quizzes and real-life examples, Yager covers all the bases, including:
- The 21 types of negative friends - a rogues’ gallery featuring such familiar types as the Blood-Sucker, the Fault-Finder, the Promise Breaker, and the Copycat
- How to recognize destructive friends as well as how to find ideal ones
- The email effect - how electronic communication has changed friendships for both the better and the worse
- The misuse of friendship at work - how to deal with a co-worker’s lies, deceit, or attempts at revenge
- How to stop obsessing about a failed friendship
- And much more
The first highly prescriptive book to focus on the complexities of friendship, When Friendship Hurts demonstrates how, why, and when to let go of bad friends and how to develop the positive friendships that enrich our lives on every level. For everyone who has ever wondered about friends who betray, hurt, or reject them, this authoritative book provides invaluable insights and advice to resolve the problem once and for all.
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- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you know one of these men? The catch-me-if-you-can lover...Phil's romantic and passionate one minute, distant and cold the next. The deviously manipulative coworker or boss...Jack denies resenting Nora's rapid rise in the company, but when they're assigned to work together on a project, he undermines her. The obstructionist, procrastinating husband...Bob keeps telling his wife he'll finish the painting job he began years ago, but he never seems to get around to it. These are all classic examples of the passive aggressive man.
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A good review of the PA type man
- By Dew on 12-29-17
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
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- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
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I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You
- Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship
- By: Andrew G. Marshall
- Narrated by: Andrew G. Marshall
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- By Brookley on 09-19-18
By: Gary Chapman
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How to Be a Best Friend Forever
- Making and Keeping Lifetime Relationships
- By: Dr. John Townsend
- Narrated by: Dr. John Townsend
- Length: 2 hrs and 13 mins
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Our world has diluted the meaning of friendship, but the reality is, there’s nothing like the sustaining strength of true-blue, forever friends. Still, many people are convinced that they’ll never find such lifelong connections—or that they don’t need them. In this encouraging audio book, best-selling author and psychologist John Townsend delivers hope and help for making these relationships a reality—and for making them even better if you’ve already got a “bestie.”
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This is a Christian based book.
- By lisak227 on 11-17-14
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
- Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Gary Galone
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Love Understood
- The Science of Who, How and Why We Love
- By: Laura Mucha
- Narrated by: Laura Mucha
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
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Poets, philosophers and artists have been trying to explain romantic love for centuries, but it remains one of the most complex and intimidating terrains to navigate. Most people are afraid to be open and honest about their relationships...until now. For Love Understood, Laura Mucha has interviewed hundreds of strangers, from the ages of 8 to 95 in more than 40 countries, asking them to share their most personal stories, feelings and insights about love.
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Insightful, informative, and thought provoking
- By James on 03-05-19
By: Laura Mucha
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Deal Breakers
- When to Work on a Relationship and When to Walk Away
- By: Dr. Bethany Marshall
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 5 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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This is a book about men. Not all men, just emotionally unhealthy men. The ones who make you question, "Is it him or is it me? Am I making too big a deal out of this? I try to tell him how I feel, but he says I'm overreacting or needy or it's all my fault". Relationships are hard work, but how hard should they be? When do you know you are struggling too hard to make a relationship succeed?
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I Cried Thru The First Thirty Minutes...
- By Kimberley on 02-20-08
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How Can I Forgive You?
- The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To
- By: Janis A. Spring, Michael Spring
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
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Until now, we have been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Spring, a gifted therapist and the award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives - without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for genuine forgiveness - one that asks as much of the offender as it does of us.
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I'm a Christian
- By jelady on 06-14-19
By: Janis A. Spring, and others
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The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?
- A Woman's Guide to Deciding Whether to Stay or Go
- By: Patricia Evans
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
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Coupling stories of abused women and abusive men from her own case studies, Patricia Evans here gives you the tools you need to transform your relationship. Most important, she assures you that such a transformation is possible—given the right circumstances. Evans also helps you determine if your abuser really has changed—or if he’s merely creating the illusion of change. And if he hasn’t changed, Evans helps you decide whether it’s time to leave the relationship—and what to do when it is.
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A gift to the emotionally violated
- By curious23m on 08-16-15
By: Patricia Evans
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Generic tools for overcoming overthinking
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What listeners say about When Friendship Hurts
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Haley
- 08-07-24
People Pleaser
Wow. This one hurt. Im going through a friendship right now which Im not sure if I should end even after this. She didn’t talk to me for 5 days then as soon as I finished the book she began talking to me again. But reading this book it made me realize that I was a people pleaser. I always want to make sure people are okay. This book is a really good eye opener and reading this book really hurt realizing I give too much but at the same time this book made me realize theres a possibility that I am/was being dramatic about wanting to end the friendship. This book really gives multiple views on everything. It is a hard book to listen to in one go though because its the type of book where “its a hard pill to swallow” overall it was good and if I was struggling with another friendship I would probably read it again to get more insight (and to realize im still a people pleaser)
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Overall
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Performance
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- Terri Mays
- 01-21-22
Comforting and Applicable
This book has provided a lot of comfort for me while evaluating some of my closest relationships. It has also caused me to do a lot of self-reflection and self work. I feel like I have the tools I need to make healthier lasting relationships and salvage some of my closest, strained ones.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Brian E. Jones
- 03-08-18
Great book but robotic narrator...
Informative and helpful book about friendship difficulties. This was just what I needed to deal with my friend who is self-absorbed and unavailable!
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- Mar
- 02-04-24
Good points
This is the first book that I book marked and made notes on and I’m a consistent reader/listener. This is the first book in my year of self development (2024)/ rediscovering myself.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Qalb-e-Saleem
- 12-11-12
Good Book
What did you love best about When Friendship Hurts?
The anecdotes shared from the author's experience as a researcher.
What about Tanya Eby’s performance did you like?
Good performance. At times, it could have done better with a few more pauses and breaks (especially in between topics)
Did you have an extreme reaction to this book? Did it make you laugh or cry?
NA
Any additional comments?
Audio books are perhaps best for fiction and self help that does not need to be referenced later.
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1 person found this helpful
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- 06-11-18
Great bool!!
Really loved this book, and would reccomend it to anyone struggling with friendships and has questions about what is healthy and what is not. so much useful information here. I will listen to it again!!
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- Melinda Jones
- 04-01-24
Great help
This is very insightful. It’s basically affirming everything. I already knew that the friendship I have is extremely toxic and needs to end it basically over already. I just need to accept it and just move on. But like stated it’s not that easy. I really regret now not having more than just the one friend because now I have nobody. And that’s one reason why I’ve continued to accept what little bit of friendship this person has been willing to offer. this book has however helped me realize that once I cut off this friendship it’ll open up the possibility of many more friendships, so will be a lot healthier
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- KDS
- 11-17-22
Boring and patronizing
Awful. Don’t waste your time. Unless you’re a 10 year old trying to learn about friends, you don’t need this book. At all.
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