But It’s Your Family...
Cutting Ties with Toxic Family Members and Loving Yourself in the Aftermath
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Narrated by:
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Dr. Sherrie Campbell
About this listen
But It’s Your Family is a remarkable account of what it means to cut ties to toxic family abuse and thrive in the aftermath.
Loving someone doesn’t always mean having a relationship with them, just like forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation. Reconciling, in many cases, only sets people up for more abuse. A significant part of healing comes with accepting that this is a part of life; there are some relationships that are so poisonous that they destroy one’s ability to be healthy and function best. Dr. Sherrie Campbell clarifies how parents, adult children, siblings, grandparents, and in-laws can be toxic while giving direction on how to explain cutting ties to children and others who may not understand. When listeners are able to bring closure to those toxic relationships, they give themselves the space to love those family members from a distance, as fellow human beings, with the knowledge that it is unwise to remain connected. In But It’s Your Family, listeners learn how to love themselves in the process and fundamentally change their lives for the better.
©2019 Dr. Sherrie Campbell (P)2020 Dr. Sherrie CampbellListeners also enjoyed...
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- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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When a child is hurting, it can be the most painful challenge a parent will face. With compassion and perspective, Dr. Brad Reedy offers hope and wisdom for children who struggle and the parents who love them. The Journey of the Heroic Parent will take you on a journey to a happier, healthier relationship with your struggling child - and yourself. Through lessons learned, mother, father, and child will achieve greater understanding, love, and humanity - no matter what the outcome.
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Loved it! Will read over again and again!
- By wooplicity on 06-21-15
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Break Through
- When to Give In, How to Push Back
- By: Tim Clinton, Pat Springle
- Narrated by: Christopher Prince
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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When you really care about someone, it’s easy to get stuck in painful, even destructive patterns - caving in to a spouse’s manipulation, ignoring a live-at-home son’s irresponsibility, not confronting a friend’s addiction. We excuse people again and again, and then kick ourselves for not setting better boundaries. But this important audiobook, with its transformational tools from leading Christian counselor Tim Clinton and noted author Pat Springle, will guide you in not only breaking through to better relationships but making big changes for the better.
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Worth the read
- By Jessie on 12-29-19
By: Tim Clinton, and others
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Get out of Your Own Way: Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
- Overcoming Self-Defeating Behavior
- By: Philip Goldberg, Mark Goulston MD
- Narrated by: Mark Goulston
- Length: 4 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Practical, proven self-help steps show how to transform 40 common self-defeating behaviors, including procrastination, envy, obsession, anger, self-pity, compulsion, neediness, guilt, rebellion, inaction, and more.
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Nothing new
- By MsJulyswimwear on 07-25-20
By: Philip Goldberg, and others
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Why Good People Do Bad Things
- By: Debbie Ford
- Narrated by: Debbie Ford
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Why Good People Do Bad Things exposes the pervasive and often hidden impulses that influence our everyday decisions. The headlines are full of stories of good people gone astray. They show up on the evening news and are splashed across the weekly tabloids.
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Examples but no help changing...
- By Rebecca on 12-13-11
By: Debbie Ford
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10 Stupid Things Couples Do To Mess Up Their Relationships
- By: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Narrated by: Dr. Laura Schlessinger
- Length: 2 hrs and 37 mins
- Abridged
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In Ten Stupid Things Couples Do to Mess Up Their Relationships, Dr. Laura Schlessinger calls for a return to traditional courtship. Courtship allows couples and their families to get acquainted with each other over a longer period of time, and provides structure and guidelines for that important process.
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No brainer ideas that we can forget
- By Ali0531 on 07-06-15
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When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder
- A Guide for Adult Children
- By: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
- Narrated by: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
- Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up with a mom who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is difficult - but it’s still possible to have a functioning adult relationship with her. When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder provides you with crucial information for understanding the patterns behind her Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as the tools you need to start your own recovery process.
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Great advice IF you decide to or must continue a relationship with someone with BPD
- By Sarah M. on 05-21-24
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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The Emotionally Destructive Relationship
- Seeing It, Stopping It, Surviving It
- By: Leslie Vernick
- Narrated by: Leslie Vernick
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools.
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Thank you
- By Anonymous User on 08-27-24
By: Leslie Vernick
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Boundaries with Kids
- How Healthy Choices Grow Healthy Children
- By: Henry Cloud, John Townsend
- Narrated by: Henry O. Arnold
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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What the award-winning, best-selling Boundaries has done for adult relationships, Boundaries with Kids will do for you and your children. Drs. Henry Cloud and John Townsend provide the help and guidance you need for raising your kids to take responsibility for their actions, attitudes, and emotions. With wisdom and empathy, they take you through the ins and outs of instilling the kind of character in your children that will help them lead balanced, productive, and fulfilling adult lives.
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Not what I would recommend as a therapist who works primarily with children
- By Amanda on 02-12-21
By: Henry Cloud, and others
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The New Codependency
- Help and Guidance for Today's Generation
- By: Melody Beattie
- Narrated by: Lorna Raver
- Length: 10 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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In Codependent No More, Melody Beattie introduced the world to the term codependency. In The New Codependency, she clears up misconceptions, identifies how codependent behavior has changed, and provides a new generation with a road map to wellness.
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Please offer with different narrator
- By Janie on 11-12-09
By: Melody Beattie
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“Toxic Family Survival Guide” is for anyone who wants to give themselves a fighting chance at happiness and peace in their life, no matter what their early years subjected them to.
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Great Book.
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***Referenced in the New York Times Sunday July 14, 2024 Does God really expect us to put up with a lifetime of abuse from the bullies, liars, manipulators, abusers and users we know, just because we were born into a toxic family or were deceived into befriending a narcissist who hid his true self from us at first? Christians often feel stuck in abusive relationships with narcissistic or psychopathic friends or family, either haunted by guilt or plagued by Holier-Than-Thous who think they have the right to judge us for finally getting away and staying away. In this book, you will learn ...
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Christian??
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The Good Daughter Syndrome
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You love your mother, but she drives you crazy. She controls, criticizes, and butts into your life constantly. Then when you try and set boundaries, the pushback and resulting guilt are so bad you tell yourself...it's just not worth it. Is your mother narcissistic, borderline, or just plain difficult? Are you empathetic, sensitive, and kind? If so, chances are you have fallen into one or all of the hidden psychological traps that constitute the Good Daughter Syndrome.
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Decent primer if your mom is still in your life
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Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People
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If you grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, you may recall your childhood as a time when your emotional needs were not met or dismissed—and you may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, and abandonment. As an adult, you have fought hard to establish your own sense of self, and heal the wounds caused by your upbringing. But what about other emotionally immature people (EIP) in your life? As an adult child of an emotionally immature parent (ACEIP), you may be particularly vulnerable to EIPs.
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Perhaps the most impactful book of my life
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Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters
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The best news on the planet is that your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be happy. In fact, author Karen C.L. Anderson will take it a step further and say your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be free, peaceful, contented, and joyful. You can emotionally separate without guilt: Inspired by her own journey, Anderson's Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters shows women how to emotionally separate from their mothers without guilt and anxiety so they can finally create a life based on their own values, desires, needs, and preferences.
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Had to return the book
- By Amazon Customer on 05-29-19
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When to Walk Away
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Your life's calling is too important to let toxic people take it away. In When to Walk Away, Gary Thomas - best-selling author of Sacred Marriage - draws from biblical and modern stories to equip you with practical insights to handle toxic people in your life and live true to your God-given purpose.
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Don’t be trapped by the idea that a good Christian just has to endure toxic abuse. You can walk away.
- By S White on 02-08-20
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What listeners say about But It’s Your Family...
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Matt & Merrily
- 08-23-21
Five stars
Doc Sherrie hit things on the head. Especially the cutting them out of our lives. Toxic family does gather others against the scape goat.
Thank you
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- kelly layton
- 12-06-23
A Great Tool for Healing from a Toxic Family
Campbell breaks down the experience of growing up in a toxic family dynamic in a way that is completely relatable. As an adult child of parents and siblings with covert narcissistic personality disorder, Campbell’s insight validates the lifelong struggle of being the family scapegoat & empath. This book is one of many tools in my cptsd healing journey arsenal.
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- Natalie
- 01-07-24
it ia especially valuable when a narrator is the author!
Very helpful when the author breaks down the reasons for certain behaviors, with examples of how to explain better to yourself and to justify why it is or is not right behavior. Very helpful on how to communicate with other family members.
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- kyle whalen
- 01-24-24
Another tool to help me on this wild ride
I have my very own NPD mother who is absolutely terrible to my wife, triangulates my family and has made my life a living hell for so many years. I discovered finally 3-4 years ago finally what was going on after moving out 10 years ago with my gf/wife and slowly started seeing the big picture once I was away from her grasp. I’m in the healing/forgiveness stage for my own healing (I’m no contact with my whole family) and this offered some fresh perspective and clarity to everything and reminded me I’m not crazy. It’s insane to me how someone can be this way to their child but again it was never about me, it’s about them.
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- Victoria D. Bellis
- 02-22-24
Excellent info on No Contact with family.
Outstanding resource for understanding the dynamics and specific situations of how a family member crosses boundaries, family histories of abuses . How to go No Contact and what to expect when you do. Excellent work by the doctor. I’m planning on reading her other book she mentioned in this. Family dynamics have always fascinated me and this explains a lot of things I went through as a child but I didn’t understand it back then. I don’t have to No Contact my parents, they have both passed on but I did cut off my older brother 30+ years ago because of the childhood trauma he caused and would not acknowledge or apologize for it. I wish I could have had this book 35 years ago. A+++
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- jonathan a.
- 11-20-20
Wonderful resource
Dr. Campbell, thank you for writing this book, your heart felt thoughts have been so validating and healing. Thank you for the insight and encouragement provided. This is a very good resource in navigating my way out of my toxic family. Simply amazing!
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4 people found this helpful
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- Kelsey Bucklew
- 03-13-21
A specialist that can relate to my problems.
Most of us here are seeking tips for dealing with our own toxic family members. The majority of my family (aunts, uncles, siblings, parents, in-laws, cousins) are completely toxic people. I needed to hear that I was not crazy. Dr. Campbell pretty much described my entire family in just a couple of chapters. I deeply appreciate our differences in experiences, though. It was hard to hear it, but it revealed the effects and outcomes of the abuse that my sister has received. We were both abused by our mother and neglected by our passive father, yet we came out as complete opposites.
The chapter about separation abuse was most helpful. I have been dealing with that for about 10+ years now and it feels great to know that someone understands the stress that I am going through and is supportive of my choices with cutting ties. No researcher could ever comprehend the trauma and paranoia separation abuse does to us. Only people that have been there and felt this pain could ever understand and offer coping mechanisms for us--and telling us that we're not alone is already comforting.
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- Linda
- 03-10-21
Been through most of this
I have faced much of what was disscussed in this book. Over the last ten years I have been learning to apply some of the things in this book. I highly suggest this book for thoses struggling with emotional abuse.
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- Ashley Jeney
- 12-10-21
Perfect
VERY helpful, I'm going to listen one more time... I cried and laughed, I felt the anger again when I've heard others accounts... I am so thankful to have come across this book and more specifically, this author.
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- Jeffrey Schotzko
- 11-21-22
Wonderful healing advice.
So happy I received this book to listen and find comfort that maybe I’m not alone.
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