
But It’s Your Family...
Cutting Ties with Toxic Family Members and Loving Yourself in the Aftermath
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Narrated by:
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Dr. Sherrie Campbell
About this listen
But It’s Your Family is a remarkable account of what it means to cut ties to toxic family abuse and thrive in the aftermath.
Loving someone doesn’t always mean having a relationship with them, just like forgiveness doesn’t always mean reconciliation. Reconciling, in many cases, only sets people up for more abuse. A significant part of healing comes with accepting that this is a part of life; there are some relationships that are so poisonous that they destroy one’s ability to be healthy and function best. Dr. Sherrie Campbell clarifies how parents, adult children, siblings, grandparents, and in-laws can be toxic while giving direction on how to explain cutting ties to children and others who may not understand. When listeners are able to bring closure to those toxic relationships, they give themselves the space to love those family members from a distance, as fellow human beings, with the knowledge that it is unwise to remain connected. In But It’s Your Family, listeners learn how to love themselves in the process and fundamentally change their lives for the better.
©2019 Dr. Sherrie Campbell (P)2020 Dr. Sherrie CampbellListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Often, we may encounter unpleasant relatives who drain our energy by bringing negativity and sabotage to our moments of joy, plans, or life perspective. But there is always a reason behind their attitudes which we will dig into here. Plus, you will understand how these relatives affect your life. As you go through this book, you will be able to wisely bring closure, not to those toxic relationships but to your frustration, and give yourself the space to love those family members from a fair distance without disrespect or harmful conflicts.
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Great Information
- By Ginger Spears on 02-20-23
By: Lucca Zeni
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Mothers Who Can't Love
- A Healing Guide for Daughters
- By: Susan Forward, Donna Frazier Glynn
- Narrated by: Susan Forward, Kathleen Gati, Julia Whelan, and others
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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With Mothers Who Can't Love: A Healing Guide for Daughters, Susan Forward, Ph.D., author of the smash #1 best-seller Toxic Parents, offers a powerful look at the devastating impact unloving mothers have on their daughters - and provides clear, effective techniques for overcoming that painful legacy.
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Very Powerful. Deserves 6 stars!
- By wendy on 03-25-15
By: Susan Forward, and others
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The Good Daughter Syndrome
- Help for Empathic Daughters of Narcissistic, Borderline, or Difficult Mothers Trapped in the Role of the Good Daughter
- By: Katherine K Fabrizio
- Narrated by: Colleen Weaver
- Length: 10 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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You love your mother, but she drives you crazy. She controls, criticizes, and butts into your life constantly. Then when you try and set boundaries, the pushback and resulting guilt are so bad you tell yourself...it's just not worth it. Is your mother narcissistic, borderline, or just plain difficult? Are you empathetic, sensitive, and kind? If so, chances are you have fallen into one or all of the hidden psychological traps that constitute the Good Daughter Syndrome.
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Decent primer if your mom is still in your life
- By Twin of Eyegone on 07-01-24
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Shadow Daughter
- A Memoir of Estrangement
- By: Harriet Brown
- Narrated by: Harriet Brown
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Shadow Daughter tackles a subject we rarely discuss as a culture: Family estrangements, especially those between parents and adult children. Estrangements - between parents and children, siblings, multiple generations - are surprisingly common, and even families that aren't officially estranged often have some experience of deep conflicts. Estrangement is an issue that touches most people, one way or another, one that's still shrouded in secrecy, stigma, and shame.
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Very dangerous & harmful for society as a whole
- By Suz C. on 01-04-22
By: Harriet Brown
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Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters
- A Guide for Separation, Liberation & Inspiration
- By: Karen C.L. Anderson, Katherine Woodward Thomas - foreword
- Narrated by: Sarah Mollo-Christensen
- Length: 4 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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The best news on the planet is that your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be happy. In fact, author Karen C.L. Anderson will take it a step further and say your mother doesn't have to change in order for you to be free, peaceful, contented, and joyful. You can emotionally separate without guilt: Inspired by her own journey, Anderson's Difficult Mothers, Adult Daughters shows women how to emotionally separate from their mothers without guilt and anxiety so they can finally create a life based on their own values, desires, needs, and preferences.
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Had to return the book
- By Amazon Customer on 05-29-19
By: Karen C.L. Anderson, and others
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Disentangling from Emotionally Immature People
- Avoid Emotional Traps, Stand Up for Your Self, and Transform Your Relationships as an Adult Child of Emotionally Immature Parents
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Rachel Perry
- Length: 9 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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If you grew up with an emotionally immature, unavailable, or selfish parent, you may recall your childhood as a time when your emotional needs were not met or dismissed—and you may have lingering feelings of anger, loneliness, betrayal, and abandonment. As an adult, you have fought hard to establish your own sense of self, and heal the wounds caused by your upbringing. But what about other emotionally immature people (EIP) in your life? As an adult child of an emotionally immature parent (ACEIP), you may be particularly vulnerable to EIPs.
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Perhaps the most impactful book of my life
- By MER on 11-16-23
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Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed
- Help and Hope for Adults in the Family Scapegoat Role
- By: Rebecca C. Mandeville MFT
- Narrated by: Patricia Burgos
- Length: 2 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Family scapegoating is an insidious form of "invisible" abuse that is difficult to recognize. It is therefore critical that adult survivors of dysfunctional or narcissistic family systems understand what type of abuse they are trying to recover from. In Rejected, Shamed, and Blamed, licensed psychotherapist and family systems expert Rebecca C. Mandeville uses her research findings on what she named "Family Scapegoating Abuse" (FSA) to help survivors recognize and release the damaging "scapegoat" narrative associated with the family "identified patient" role.
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When Parents Hurt
- Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along
- By: Joshua Coleman PhD
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 8 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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This unique book supports parents who are struggling with the heartache of having a teenager or an adult child who is troubled, angry, or distant. Such rifts can cause unspeakable sorrow that parents too often must bear alone. Psychologist and parent Joshua Coleman, PhD, offers insight, empathy, and perspective to those who have lost the opportunity to be the parents they desperately wanted to be and who are mourning the loss of a harmonious relationship with their child.
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Not worth tour time...
- By TMT on 12-12-16
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Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents
- Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Suzie Althens
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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In this important sequel to Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, author Lindsay Gibson offers powerful tools to help you step back and protect yourself at the first sign of an emotional takeover, make sure your emotions and needs are respected, and break free from the coercive control of emotionally immature parents.
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Asinine
- By Amazon Customer on 07-14-20
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Absent: How to Heal from Emotionally Toxic Parents
- A Grown-Up’s Guide to Healing from Childhood Neglect, Manipulation, Trauma and Abusive Emotional Behavior
- By: Olivia K. Rice
- Narrated by: Janna L Cardia
- Length: 3 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you feel like your relationship with your parents is always bringing you down? Do they blame you for their problems, for being a thorn in their shoes, always endeavoring to make you feel like the most massive burden? Abusive parents tend to share common traits - they are constantly negatively reactive, lack empathy, are extremely controlling, always critical, and continuously transfer blame to you. If your parent ticks any of those boxes, then you are likely already aware of who and what you're dealing with. But from here on, things can only get better if you let them
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I really appreciate the action steps provided.
- By John Wesley on 06-04-21
By: Olivia K. Rice
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Toxic In-Laws
- Loving Strategies for Protecting Your Marriage
- By: Susan Forward PhD, Donna Frazier - contributor
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 8 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Susan Forward draws on real-life voices and stories of both women and men struggling to free themselves from the frustrating, hurtful, and infuriating relationships with their toxic in-laws. Dr. Forward offers you highly effective communication and behavioral techniques for getting through to partners who won't or can't stand up to their parents. Next, she lays out accessible and practical ways to reclaim you marriage from your in-laws. She shows you what to say, what to do, and what limits to set. If you follow these strategies, you will find some peace in your relationship with them.
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life changing
- By Anonymous User on 11-06-20
By: Susan Forward PhD, and others
What listeners say about But It’s Your Family...
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- Matt & Merrily
- 08-23-21
Five stars
Doc Sherrie hit things on the head. Especially the cutting them out of our lives. Toxic family does gather others against the scape goat.
Thank you
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- kelly layton
- 12-06-23
A Great Tool for Healing from a Toxic Family
Campbell breaks down the experience of growing up in a toxic family dynamic in a way that is completely relatable. As an adult child of parents and siblings with covert narcissistic personality disorder, Campbell’s insight validates the lifelong struggle of being the family scapegoat & empath. This book is one of many tools in my cptsd healing journey arsenal.
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- Natalie
- 01-07-24
it ia especially valuable when a narrator is the author!
Very helpful when the author breaks down the reasons for certain behaviors, with examples of how to explain better to yourself and to justify why it is or is not right behavior. Very helpful on how to communicate with other family members.
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- kyle whalen
- 01-24-24
Another tool to help me on this wild ride
I have my very own NPD mother who is absolutely terrible to my wife, triangulates my family and has made my life a living hell for so many years. I discovered finally 3-4 years ago finally what was going on after moving out 10 years ago with my gf/wife and slowly started seeing the big picture once I was away from her grasp. I’m in the healing/forgiveness stage for my own healing (I’m no contact with my whole family) and this offered some fresh perspective and clarity to everything and reminded me I’m not crazy. It’s insane to me how someone can be this way to their child but again it was never about me, it’s about them.
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- Victoria D. Bellis
- 02-22-24
Excellent info on No Contact with family.
Outstanding resource for understanding the dynamics and specific situations of how a family member crosses boundaries, family histories of abuses . How to go No Contact and what to expect when you do. Excellent work by the doctor. I’m planning on reading her other book she mentioned in this. Family dynamics have always fascinated me and this explains a lot of things I went through as a child but I didn’t understand it back then. I don’t have to No Contact my parents, they have both passed on but I did cut off my older brother 30+ years ago because of the childhood trauma he caused and would not acknowledge or apologize for it. I wish I could have had this book 35 years ago. A+++
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- jonathan a.
- 11-20-20
Wonderful resource
Dr. Campbell, thank you for writing this book, your heart felt thoughts have been so validating and healing. Thank you for the insight and encouragement provided. This is a very good resource in navigating my way out of my toxic family. Simply amazing!
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4 people found this helpful
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- Kelsey Bucklew
- 03-13-21
A specialist that can relate to my problems.
Most of us here are seeking tips for dealing with our own toxic family members. The majority of my family (aunts, uncles, siblings, parents, in-laws, cousins) are completely toxic people. I needed to hear that I was not crazy. Dr. Campbell pretty much described my entire family in just a couple of chapters. I deeply appreciate our differences in experiences, though. It was hard to hear it, but it revealed the effects and outcomes of the abuse that my sister has received. We were both abused by our mother and neglected by our passive father, yet we came out as complete opposites.
The chapter about separation abuse was most helpful. I have been dealing with that for about 10+ years now and it feels great to know that someone understands the stress that I am going through and is supportive of my choices with cutting ties. No researcher could ever comprehend the trauma and paranoia separation abuse does to us. Only people that have been there and felt this pain could ever understand and offer coping mechanisms for us--and telling us that we're not alone is already comforting.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Linda
- 03-10-21
Been through most of this
I have faced much of what was disscussed in this book. Over the last ten years I have been learning to apply some of the things in this book. I highly suggest this book for thoses struggling with emotional abuse.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Ashley Jeney
- 12-10-21
Perfect
VERY helpful, I'm going to listen one more time... I cried and laughed, I felt the anger again when I've heard others accounts... I am so thankful to have come across this book and more specifically, this author.
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- Jeffrey Schotzko
- 11-21-22
Wonderful healing advice.
So happy I received this book to listen and find comfort that maybe I’m not alone.
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