We Should Get Together
The Secret to Cultivating Better Friendships
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Narrated by:
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Kat Vellos
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By:
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Kat Vellos
About this listen
We Should Get Together is the handbook for anyone who's ready for better friendships, now.
Have you recently moved to a new city and are struggling to make friends?
Do you find yourself constantly making plans with friends that fall through?
Are you more likely to see your friends' social media posts than their faces?
You aren't alone. Millions of adults struggle with an uncomfortable and persistent ache: platonic longing, which is the unfulfilled wish for authentic, resilient, close friendships.
But it doesn't have to be this way. Making and maintaining friendships during adulthood can be hard or, with a bit of intention and creativity, joyful.
Author Kat Vellos, experienced designer and founder of Better Than Small Talk, tackles the four most common challenges of adult friendship: constant relocation, full schedules, the demands of partnership and family, and our culture's declining capacity for compassion and intimacy in the age of social media.
Combining expert research and personal stories pulled from conversations with hundreds of adults, We Should Get Together is the critically acclaimed, much-beloved, modern guide for making and maintaining stronger friendships.
With this book, you will learn to:
- Make and maintain friendships when you (or your friends) keep moving
- Have deeper and more meaningful conversations
- Triumph over awkwardness in social situations
- Become less dependent on your phone
- Identify and prioritize quality connections
- Find time for friendship despite your busy calendar
- Create closer, more durable friendships
Full of relatable stories, evidence-based guidance, practical tips, and 55 suggested activities, We Should Get Together is the perfect book for anyone who wants to have dedicated, life-enriching friends and who wants to be that kind of friend, too.
©2020 Kat Vellos (P)2021 Kat VellosListeners also enjoyed...
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- The New Science of Mental Wellbeing
- By: Dr. Rangan Chatterjee
- Narrated by: Dr. Rangan Chatterjee
- Length: 5 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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During his twenty years as a GP, Dr. Rangan Chatterjee, author of the international bestseller Feel Better in 5, has seen first-hand that motivation isn't always enough for us to maintain a healthy lifestyle. It's only when we learn how to support our own mental wellbeing and cultivate core happiness that these choices become easy. In Happy Mind, Happy Life, Dr. Chatterjee shares cutting-edge insights into the science of happiness and reveals ten simple ways to put you back in control of your health.
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Ok
- By Anonymous User on 07-01-22
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At Your Best
- How to Get Time, Energy, and Priorities Working in Your Favor
- By: Carey Nieuwhof
- Narrated by: Carey Nieuwhof
- Length: 5 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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At Your Best gives you the strategies you need to win at work and at home by living in a way today that will help you thrive tomorrow. Influential podcast host and thought leader Carey Nieuwhof understands the challenges of constant pressure. After a season of burnout almost took him out, he discovered how to get time, energy, and priorities working in his favor. This approach freed up more than one thousand productive hours a year for him and can do the same for you.
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So helpful.
- By kevin on 09-21-21
By: Carey Nieuwhof
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Becoming Super Woman
- A Simple 12-Step Plan to Go from Burnout to Balance
- By: Nicole Lapin
- Narrated by: Nicole Lapin
- Length: 8 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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It's time to stop putting yourself at the bottom of every to-do list and start taking care of yourself first. It's time to leave Superwoman in the movies, where she belongs, and say hello to being a super woman - the best, most productive version of the hero you already are.
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Easy Listen and advice that is actually useful
- By Sean E. Huie on 10-21-19
By: Nicole Lapin
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Things No One Else Can Teach Us
- Turning Losses into Lessons
- By: Humble the Poet
- Narrated by: Humble the Poet
- Length: 6 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Every one of us endures setbacks, disappointments, and failures that can incapacitate us. But we don’t have to let them. Instead, we can use these events as opportunities for growth. In Things No One Else Can Teach Us, Humble the Poet flips the conventional script for happiness and success, showing us how our most painful experiences can be our greatest teachers.
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HTP’S STORY AND LESSONS LEARNED
- By jaga on 11-04-19
By: Humble the Poet
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Differently Wired
- Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World
- By: Deborah Reber
- Narrated by: Deborah Reber
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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Rhythms of Renewal
- Trading Stress and Anxiety for a Life of Peace and Purpose
- By: Rebekah Lyons
- Narrated by: Rebekah Lyons
- Length: 5 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Rhythms of Renewal is your guide to daily rescue and a way forward into the peace your soul longs for. As a society, we are in the throes of a collective panic attack. Anxiety and loneliness are on the rise, with 77% of our population experiencing physical symptoms of stress on a regular basis. We feel pressure chasing careers, security, and keeping up. We worry about health, politics, and many other complexities we can't control. Eventually, we find our minds spinning, trying to cope or manage a low hum of anxiety, unlike ever before.
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Great writer but should stick to fiction
- By Jana Leig Fiedler on 11-06-19
By: Rebekah Lyons
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Winging It: Stop Thinking, Start Doing
- Why Action Beats Planning Every Time
- By: Emma Isaacs
- Narrated by: Emma Isaacs
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Women are notorious over-preparers and underestimators when it comes to their own readiness to try something new. But as Emma teaches, what most often holds us back are our own fears, excuses, and doubts. With her revolutionary manifesto, Winging It, Emma shares a rallying cry for all women to “do the things that scare you, build your wealth, make an impact, fail lots, and get up and try again”.
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Good advice
- By Amanda Schmidt on 05-28-21
By: Emma Isaacs
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Easier Than You Think
- The Small Changes That Add Up to a World of Difference
- By: Richard Carlson Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Richard Carlson Ph.D.
- Length: 2 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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All of us are looking for practical ways to take control of our lives, whether in our personal relationships, our families, our work, our health, or our future plans. Daily challenges have a way of overwhelming us, making life harder than it needs to be. The good news is that the answers are out there. And they are Easier Than You Think.
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Terrific, uplifting ideas to improve your life.
- By Beth on 07-18-05
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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He's Just Not Your Type (And That's a Good Thing)
- How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It
- By: Andrea Syrtash
- Narrated by: Andrea Syrtash
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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A relationship expert and dating columnist shares her counterintuitive approach to lasting love: encouraging women to date their "non-types". After years of dating, many women fall into relationship ruts. As serial daters, they are attracted to the same type of man time and again. Clearly something's not working. But the problem is not that he's just not that into them - the reality is he's just not their type.
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Amazing Insight
- By Maria M on 02-10-19
By: Andrea Syrtash
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The Introvert's Way
- Living a Quiet Life in a Noisy World
- By: Sophia Dembling
- Narrated by: Rose Itzcovitz
- Length: 4 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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This clever and pithy audiobook challenges introverts to take ownership of their personalities...with quiet strength. Sophia Dembling asserts that the introvert’s lifestyle is not "wrong" or lacking, as society or extroverts would have us believe. Through a combination of personal insights and psychology, The Introvert’s Way helps and encourages introverts to embrace their nature, to respect traits they may have been ashamed of and reframe them as assets.
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Common Sense Fluff
- By James on 06-17-15
By: Sophia Dembling
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The Good Fight
- Wanting to Leave, Choosing to Stay, and the Powerful Practice for Loving Faithfully
- By: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Narrated by: Jana Kramer, Michael Caussin
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Hosts of the award-winning Whine Down podcast, Jana Kramer and Michael Caussin explore the raw and real moments of their marriage - what it means to love, to fight, and to sincerely forgive - with spiritual guidance and practical advice for anyone seeking stronger, more fulfilling love.
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Could’ve been a short article and not a book
- By J Klay on 11-01-20
By: Jana Kramer, and others
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When Making Others Happy Is Making You Miserable
- How to Break the Pattern of People Pleasing and Confidently Live Your Life
- By: Karen Ehman, Lysa TerKeurst
- Narrated by: Karen Ehman
- Length: 6 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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When Making Others Happy Is Making You Miserable shares the refreshing, heartfelt lessons that Karen learned firsthand during her own journey of breaking free from people pleasing in order to live out her God-given purpose. Let Karen be your new go-to guide as you learn to successfully break the destructive pattern of people pleasing and start fully embracing the life God has called you to lead.
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Warning: Extremely Christian!
- By ~K*Sea~ on 02-26-22
By: Karen Ehman, and others
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Why do we assume romantic relationships are more important than friendships? What do we lose when we expect a spouse to meet all our needs? And what can we learn about commitment, love, and family from people who put deep friendship at the center of their lives? In The Other Significant Others, NPR's Rhaina Cohen invites us into the lives of people who have defied convention by choosing a friend as a life partner—these are friends who are home co-owners, co-parents or each other’s caregivers.
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Best book I’ve read in a while, and I will definitely recommend it!
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Friendship in the Age of Loneliness
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We are lonelier than ever. The average American hasn't made a new friend in the last five years. Research has shown that people with close friends are happier, healthier, and live longer than people who lack strong social bonds. But why - when we are seemingly more connected than ever before - can it feel so difficult to keep those bonds alive and well? Why do we spend only four percent of our time with friends? In this warm, inspiring guide, Adam "Smiley" Poswolsky proposes a new solution for the mounting pressures of modern life: Focus on your friendships.
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This Gave Me Hope
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I wanted to like this book
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Wish there was a pdf included
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How do we make and keep friends in an era of distraction, burnout, and chaos, especially in a society that often prizes romantic love at the expense of other relationships? In Platonic, Dr. Marisa G. Franco unpacks the latest, often counterintuitive findings about the bonds between us—for example, why your friends aren’t texting you back (it’s not because they hate you!), and the myth of “friendships happening organically” (making friends, like cultivating any relationship, requires effort!).
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Not what I was expecting - but I still enjoyed a lot of it
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The Other Significant Others
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Why do we assume romantic relationships are more important than friendships? What do we lose when we expect a spouse to meet all our needs? And what can we learn about commitment, love, and family from people who put deep friendship at the center of their lives? In The Other Significant Others, NPR's Rhaina Cohen invites us into the lives of people who have defied convention by choosing a friend as a life partner—these are friends who are home co-owners, co-parents or each other’s caregivers.
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Best book I’ve read in a while, and I will definitely recommend it!
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I wanted to like this book
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Unuseful
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By the time Will Schwalbe was a junior at college, he had already met everyone he cared to know: the theater people, writers, visual artists and comp lit majors, and various other quirky characters including the handful of students who shared his own major, Latin and Greek. He also knew exactly who he wanted to avoid: the jocks. The jocks wore baseball caps and moved in packs, filling boisterous tables in the dining hall, and on the whole seemed to be another species entirely, one Will might encounter only at his own peril.
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Great read
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Together
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Humans are social creatures: In this simple and obvious fact lies both the problem and the solution to the current crisis of loneliness. In his groundbreaking audiobook, the 19th surgeon general of the United States Dr. Vivek Murthy makes a case for loneliness as a public health concern: a root cause and contributor to many of the epidemics sweeping the world today from alcohol and drug addiction to violence to depression and anxiety.
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Losing 7 Friends to Suicide, I’m Glad I Read This
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Friendships Don't Just Happen!
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Every woman is searching for a happier, healthier, more fulfilling life. Many realize the significant role that an intimate, tightly knit circle of friends plays in creating a more fulfilling life, but with hectic schedules, frequent moves, and life changes, it's more important than ever for women to establish natural, meaningful friendships. In Friendships Don't Just Happen!, Shasta Nelson, friendship expert and CEO of GirlFriendCircles.com, reveals the most important proven steps, processes, and secrets vital to establishing the five different levels of friendships.
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Hope to revise this review soon...
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Find Your People
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In a world that's both more connected and more isolating than ever before, we’re often tempted to do life alone, whether because we’re so busy or because relationships feel risky and hard. But science confirms that consistent, meaningful connection with others has a powerful impact on our well-being. We are meant to live known and loved. But so many are hiding behind emotional walls that we’re experiencing an epidemic of loneliness. In Find Your People, you’ll discover exactly how to dive into the deep end and experience the full wonder of community.
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Christian
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Think Like a Breadwinner
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Nearly half of working women in the United States are now their household's main breadwinner. And yet, the majority of women still aren't being brought up to think like breadwinners. In fact, they're actually discouraged - by institutional bias and subconscious beliefs - from building their own wealth, pursuing their full earning potential, and providing for themselves and others financially. In Think Like a Breadwinner, financial expert Jennifer Barrett reframes what it really means to be a breadwinner.
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Great advice
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Fighting for Our Friendships
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Bumble BFF’s resident friend expert identifies the 9 most common conflict types in women's platonic relationships, sharing practical strategies to resolve issues and strengthen ties.
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A book about women’s friendships
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Imperfect Courage
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In 2015, Inc. magazine recognized Noonday Collection as one of the fastest-growing companies in America. Years earlier, as Jessica Honegger stood at a pawn-shop counter in Austin, Texas, and handed over her grandmother's gold jewelry, her goal was personal: to fund the adoption of her Rwandan son by selling artisan-made jewelry. This first step launched an unexpected side-hustle that would grow into Noonday Collection. She teamed up with her first artisan partner, Jalia, a Ugandan jewelry maker and saw the meaningful impact Noonday brought to Jalia's community.
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Too Church for me
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The 2-Hour Cocktail Party
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"You know that well-connected friend who only exists in the movies? The one who throws the best parties and can set up any introduction you need? Everyone wants to know someone magical like this who brings people together. The secret is: you can be that person. You should be that person. The 2-Hour Cocktail Party will show you how.
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Genius approach: “make it easy for yourself as the host”
- By Osborne C. on 01-19-23
By: Nick Gray
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I'll Be There (But I'll Be Wearing Sweatpants)
- Finding Unfiltered, Real-Life Friendships in This Crazy, Chaotic World
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Loneliness doesn't care what age you are, how many Instagram followers you have, or where you call home. It doesn't care how "put together" you appear to the outside world. We have a collective wound that only authentic sisterhood can heal. With real-life vulnerability and "I’ve been there, too" wisdom about building deep and satisfying friendships, Amy and Jess unpack the lies we've been told about friendship
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Heavy religious content slightly off-putting
- By Gary on 03-12-22
By: Amy Weatherly, and others
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The Connection Cure
- The Prescriptive Power of Movement, Nature, Art, Service and Belonging
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Traditionally, when we get sick, health care professionals ask, “What’s the matter with you?” But around the world, teams of doctors, nurses, therapists, and social workers have started to flip the script, asking “What matters to you?” Instead of solely pharmaceutical prescriptions, they offer ‘social prescriptions’—referrals to community activities and resources, like photography classes, gardening groups, and volunteering gigs. The results speak for themselves.
By: Julia Hotz
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The Art and Science of Connection
- Why Social Health Is the Missing Key to Living Longer, Healthier, and Happier
- By: Kasley Killam
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A groundbreaking redefinition of what it means to be healthy that introduces the need for social health—the part of wellbeing that comes from feeling connected—to truly flourish. Exercise. Eat a balanced diet. Go to therapy. Most wellness advice is focused on achieving and maintaining good physical and mental health. But Harvard-trained social scientist and pioneering social health expert Kasley Killam reveals that this approach is missing a vital component: human connection.
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Social Health Movement
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What listeners say about We Should Get Together
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Amazon Customer
- 11-25-22
Close to perfect for me
I am writing a book about friendships. :)
I really liked all of the content of this book and find it very honest and whole. The only thing that I would recommend for those who are listening to it because they find it hard to start new friendships is to start with the chapters about awkwardness. If you feel awkward in situations, than if you listen to the book from the beginning, it sound like: “… mmm ok, but how should I do this?” I think most peoples problem is not that they do not know what they should do but they do not know how. You can tell people to go to someone and ask them if they want to hang out, but what if 500 people all tell you no? I find the solutions good, but a little shallow.
The parts that were missing for me were the parts that go deeper about fears and about behavior that make it hard to make friend with others. I think that it’s easier to make a new friend when you are young, beautiful and have a normal human behavior, but it’s really much harder when you are really weird and most people find you irritating or just not a good company. Other then this missing topic, perfect book!
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- Elvis
- 06-29-24
Best book on Friendship!
Kat's passion and experience comes through clearly in this well-thought-out distillation of her wisdom on friendship. I appreciate the time and experience she beings to bear and her warm way of communicating. Her reading voice is great too!
I've been searching for good books on friendship and belonging, and this is the best one yet, by far!
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- Lexi
- 02-08-23
Enjoyable and Relatable
I enjoyed listening to this. The author has a warm, kind, animated voice. The examples were modern and real. Lots of good thoughts about social media. I really liked the story about the developer / Uber driver, and the ideas around hanging out in homes. I used to not choose books if they weren’t written by experts with lots of degrees. But I find that well researched books written by people who aren’t PhDs can be more pleasant and relatable.
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- J. Randle
- 01-21-23
connection
Absolutely love this book. Life is connection to people. The author uses a friendly, welcoming style to help readers with ideas to have a richer connection with others.
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- Lisi
- 08-18-24
Love this book
I have no idea how this book ended up in my queue, but I am so grateful it did and it couldn’t have been better timed. Thank you for the wonderful material within. Very validating and practical suggestions!
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- Revive Media Group
- 03-15-22
A beautiful and brilliant wake up call to the richness we’re missing out on in life.
I had high hopes for this book based on hearing the author Kat talk at an event. And let me tell you, this book did not disappoint.
It was very thorough in dismantling the excuses for why we as adults don’t invest in cultivating true and life giving friendships.
It’s insightful and hopeful. It has the type of honesty that stings a bit yet in the end makes you better for it.
Not only does Kat go over the issues plaguing us from making friendships, she is generous and abundant with providing practical and flexible ways to start, rekindle and invest in friendships that thrive.
I loved it.
The only chapter I was missing was one on kindling online connections. Which from my experience give so much value especially when your local community you’re in may not be able to provide.
But really, I’m knit-picking here.
We Should Get Together is a practical handbook for those of us craving connection in a world that belittles platonic, deep and real friendships.
It’s a refreshing read for the friendship thirsty.
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- Heidi K. Paa
- 02-10-22
Great for another audience
Majority of books applies to young people not in a committed relationship or with children. Good ideas but little attention paid to difficulties experiences by parents, etc
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- Bellarific
- 06-17-24
Short on solutions, big on explaining the problem
Both the introduction and conclusion of the book talk about how many people struggle to create and maintain friendships.
The takeaway advice is so simple— make the effort, be honest, be consistent, and make it happen. It’s not that insightful.
Example: people are busy. Can’t meet? Oh well, find someone who is more available.
I wish this book had more practical applications. It’s painfully emphasizing all the ways friendships fail to form or end too soon.
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- MTE
- 06-29-24
Lost me at her woke story
It was ok until she brought the story of her “white male friend “ saying “that’s gay”. And how wrong he was. NOOOO. That term is older than she is. Gay means many things. Smh. STOP with the woke sensitivity bs. Done with the audio right there.
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