Witches Be Crazy
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Narrated by:
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James Patrick Cronin
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By:
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Logan J. Hunder
About this listen
Real heroes never die. But they do get grouchy in middle age. The beloved King Ik is dead, and there was barely time to check his pulse before the royal throne was supporting the suspiciously shapely backside of an impostor pretending to be Ik's beautiful, long-lost daughter. With the land's heroic hunks busy drooling all over themselves, there's only one man left who can save the kingdom of Jenair. His name is Dungar Loloth, a rural blacksmith turned innkeeper, a surly hermit, and an all-around nobody oozing toward middle age, compensating for a lack of height, looks, charm, and tact with guts and an attitude. Normally politics is the least of his concerns, but after everyone in the neighboring kingdom of Farrawee comes down with a severe case of being dead, Dungar learns that the masquerading princess not only is behind the carnage but also has similar plans for his own hometown. Together with the only person senseless enough to tag along, an eccentric and arguably insane hobo named Jimminy, he journeys out into the world he's so pointedly tried to avoid as the only hope of defeating the most powerful person in it. That is, if he can survive the pirates, cultists, radical Amazonians, and assorted other dangers lying in wait along the way. Logan J. Hunder's hilarious debut blows up the fantasy genre with its wry juxtaposition of the fantastic and the mundane, proving that the best and brightest heroes aren't always the best for the job.
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In one of the last cities standing after the world fell to monsters, best friends Zed Kagari and Brock Dunderfel have high hopes for the future. Zed desperately wishes to join the ranks of the Mages Guild, where his status as Freestone's only half-elf might finally be an asset. Brock, the roguishly handsome son of merchants, is confident he'll be welcomed into the ranks of the Merchants Guild. But just as it seems the boys' dreams have come true, their lives take a startling turn...and they find themselves members of the perilous Adventurers Guild.
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Well written and well read.
- By Reviewer on 05-22-19
By: Zack Loran Clark, and others
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The Sellsword
- Dragonlance: Tracy Hickman Presents: The Anvil of Time, Book 1
- By: Cam Banks
- Narrated by: James Langton
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Strike the Anvil of Time! Vanderjack is a mercenary with a troubled past and a sword haunted by ghosts. Hired to rescue a nobleman's daughter from behind enemy lines, the sellsword finds himself a pivotal player in the liberation of Nordmaar from the Red Dragon army. The Chronicler is charged to use the ancient Anvil of Time to travel back along the river of time and find the lost stories that fell between the pages of the history books of Krynn in this new series created and guided by the creative mind of Tracy Hickman.
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Interesting story, alittle different at the end
- By Dennis on 04-16-13
By: Cam Banks
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In the Land of Hershel
- The Sunrider Saga, Book 0
- By: Rafael Hohmann
- Narrated by: Ralph Lister
- Length: 51 mins
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Five knights tell stories of ancient lands, madness, and terrifying monsters...but no one can top Knight Elric's tale of the Land of Hershel, a monstrous swamp filled with horrifying creatures and an ever-present threat. If you stop moving, you drown. "In the Land of Hershel" is a short story set in the thrilling world of SunRider.
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Good but
- By Mistina on 05-09-23
By: Rafael Hohmann
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The Spirit Thief
- The Legend of Eli Monpress, Book 1
- By: Rachel Aaron
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
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He's not just any thief. He’s the greatest thief of the age - and he’s also a wizard. And with the help of his partners - a swordsman with the most powerful magic sword in the world but no magical ability of his own, and a demonseed who can step through shadows and punch through walls - he’s going to put his plan into effect. The first step is to increase the size of the bounty on his head, so he’ll need to steal some big things. But he’ll start with somethingsmall. Something like a king....
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Entertaining light fantasy
- By Kindle Customer on 02-16-12
By: Rachel Aaron
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Caverns and Creatures: Volume I (Books 1-4)
- By: Robert Bevan
- Narrated by: Jonathan Sleep
- Length: 32 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Swords. Sorcery. Dick Jokes. Truly do the gods smile upon you, dear listener, for the first four books in the hilarious Caverns and Creatures series are now available in one audiobook set. Join Tim, Dave, Julian, and Cooper as they are thrown into a hostile fantasy world filled with magic and monsters, and ruled over by a cruel and sadistic game master who taunts and harasses them while he sits back and eats their fried chicken.
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A great listen, but don't listen while in public!
- By Jonathan on 06-26-19
By: Robert Bevan
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Madrenga
- By: Alan Dean Foster
- Narrated by: Tim Gerard Reynolds
- Length: 11 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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He is plainly too young and too inexperienced for the mission, but on the advice of her aged adviser Natoum, and with her husband off at war, the queen reluctantly assigns the task of delivery to...Madrenga. Accompanied only by a runt of a pony and a scrap of a pup, he sets off to transport the royal message to its destination. No matter what it might take. But things are not always what they seem. Heroes are sometimes made of the strangest stuff, and love is to be found in the most unexpected places...if one doesn’t die while treading the lethal path.
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Unique and captivating!
- By Julie Moran on 02-05-21
By: Alan Dean Foster
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Cry Havoc
- Jack Frey, Book 1
- By: Mike Morris
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
They say when the demons come, you either fight or you die.The Black Dogs know this all too well. For three hundred years, the warrior priests have sacrificed their lives to keep the island nation of Abios safe from the flesh-eating Nostros, while the rest of the world fell under the demons' savagery. However, an armada now stands poised to invade mankind's last bastion.
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truly evil enemies
- By VJG on 02-01-18
By: Mike Morris
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Dragon Age: The Stolen Throne
- By: David Gaider
- Narrated by: Stephen Hoye
- Length: 13 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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After his mother, the beloved Rebel Queen, is betrayed and murdered by her own faithless lords, young Maric becomes the leader of a rebel army attempting to free his nation from the control of a foreign tyrant. His countrymen live in fear; his commanders consider him untested; and his only allies are Loghain, a brash young outlaw who saved his life, and Rowan, the beautiful warrior maiden promised to him since birth.
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Fantastic Read
- By Brandon on 01-30-11
By: David Gaider
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Pathfinder Tales: Beyond the Pool of Stars
- By: Howard Andrew Jones
- Narrated by: Steve West
- Length: 11 hrs and 34 mins
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Mirian Raas comes from a long line of salvagers, adventurers who use magic to dive for sunken ships off the coast of tropical Sargava. When her father dies, Mirian has to take over his last job: a dangerous expedition into deep jungle pools, helping a tribe of lizardfolk reclaim the lost treasures of their people.
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Wonderful!
- By Andrew J Fix on 03-05-23
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Elizabeth's Legacy
- Royal Institute of Magic, Book 1
- By: Victor Kloss
- Narrated by: Peter Kenny
- Length: 8 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Two years after his parents' sudden disappearance, Ben Greenwood stumbles upon a cryptic letter that could shed some light on their whereabouts. But before he can track them down, he'll need to find the mysterious organization that sent the letter: The Royal Institute of Magic. To succeed, Ben will have to navigate a land filled with fantastic creatures and spellshooters, where magic can be bought and sold, to unravel an ancient family secret that could hold the key to defeating an evil the institute has been fighting for the last 500 years.
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What a fantastic tribute to Kloss
- By Evry1sLostButMe on 01-24-17
By: Victor Kloss
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Elseerian
- The Chronicles of Lumineia, Book 1
- By: Ben Hale
- Narrated by: Derek Perkins
- Length: 12 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The assassination of heroes was once a warning... for an invasion that nearly destroyed the world. Nations were slaughtered, cities were erased from existence, and defending armies were crushed into oblivion. In weeks, all life stood on the verge of extinction. But the end did not come. Instead the black horde vanished, leaving terrified survivors... and rumors. As the centuries passed the holocaust faded into legend, and finally myth. Across the southern sea a gifted young man is completing his training.
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Loved this book!
- By Andrew Stone on 10-06-13
By: Ben Hale
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Thornbear
- Champions of the Dawning Dragons, Book 1
- By: Michael G. Manning
- Narrated by: Derek Perkins
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
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Overall
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Story
Gram lives in the long shadow cast by his father, the late hero Dorian Thornbear. Struggling to find his place in a world where politics and wizardry appear to have replaced the need for men of might and main, he must make his own mark. Trapped within the seemingly safe confines of Castle Cameron, Gram faces both love and tragedy. His choices will not only define himself but serve to remind others of his family's legacy and the reason only a fool threatens those a Thornbear protects.
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An excellent story by an exceptional author
- By JW on 02-28-15
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The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
- By: Christopher Healy, Todd Harris
- Narrated by: Bronson Pinchot
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
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Overall
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Story
Prince Liam. Prince Frederic. Prince Duncan. Prince Gustav. You've never heard of them, have you? These are the princes who saved Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, and Rapunzel, respectively, and yet, thanks to those lousy bards who wrote the tales, you likely know them only as Prince Charming. But all of this is about to change.
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Warning Gushing Ahead……..
- By MissSusie66 on 05-27-12
By: Christopher Healy, and others
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Looking for a way out of the rat race? Tired of your ho-hum, workaday life? Have an inexplicable love of turning human beings into inanimate objects? Then professional supervillainy might just be for you! With tips from the renowned founder and overlord of the International Society of Supervillains, The Supervillain Handbook is your one-stop-shop for everything evil. Gain invaluable insight on the art of revenge, choosing your evil name, where to find the perfect lair, and much more!
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ehhhh...
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NPCs
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What happens when the haggling is done and the shops are closed? When the quest has been given, the steeds saddled, and the adventurers are off to their next encounter? They keep the world running, the food cooked, and the horses shoed, yet what adventurer has ever spared a thought or concern for the Non-Player Characters? In the town of Maplebark, four such NPCs settle in for a night of actively ignoring the adventurers drinking in the tavern when things go quickly and fatally awry.
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Enjoyable if you manage your expectations
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Captain Quasar is out of time. Pursued by vengeful Goobalob toll collectors, savage Arachnoid bounty hunters, and formidable Amazonians, Captain Bartholomew Quasar must do whatever he can to keep the crew of the Effervescent Magnitude out of harm's way. All in a day's work - except time is not on his side. Torn from the present to relive his past, he vows to keep mistakes from occurring the second time around. But is he doomed to repeat history? Or can he erase his regrets?
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Unexpected Entertainment
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One moment, he was enjoying a breakfast of salmon trimmings in his home in South Wales. The next, he was teleported across time and space onto the cold stone floor of an evil warlock. Locked in the warlock's tower through day and night, Ben may have to serve him for a while. He'll hate this, especially having to hunt those infernal demon rats when the warlock doesn't feed him well at all.
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Jig the goblin was the runtiest member of an admittedly puny race. Jig was scrawny, so nearsighted as to be almost blind, and had such a poor self-image that when he chose a god to worship, it was one of the forgotten ones - after all, what other sort of god would have him as worshiper? He also had a cowardly fire-spider for a pet, a creature that was likely to set your hair on fire if it got into a panic. Made to stand tunnel watch by the goblin bullies who'd been assigned the job, it was just Jig's luck to be taken captive by a group of adventurers.
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Theater of the mind
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What listeners say about Witches Be Crazy
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Customer
- 07-03-18
Great book and narration
I really enjoyed the book ! I had to be careful not to laugh too much while listening at the gym!
Narration was fantastic, characters were voiced well and accents were very good. Highly recommend!
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18 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 01-13-21
Great
Loved everything about this. Funny, entertaining. Great job all around! Nice twists and turns. Never quite sure what’s gonna happen next
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1 person found this helpful
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- Mark
- 09-18-20
Good Old Fashioned Nonsensical Romp
Okay, I'll admit this one took me a little to get in to. I wasn't overly sucked in right away, but the more I listened to the story unfold the more I had to keep sticking my earbuds in and keep on listening.
The story is a nonsense romp through a medieval type world filled with fantasy creatures and magic. Our long suffering hero, Dungar Loloth, kicks off on a quest that sees him kidnapped or otherwise held against his will an astonishing amount of time. Along the way he meets Jimminy, an... eccentric lad, chipper to the point of being possibly insane. Together they march towards their goal - to rid the kingdom of a witch who intends on usurping the throne.
There were a few moments that pulled me out of the immersion of the world along the way. Two examples I can think of are referring to whiskey as "scotch" and another time referring to "Kool-Aid". Whiskey I can believe exists, but calling it scotch didn't make sense...and Kool-Aid likely needs to explanation.
That said, Hunder packed a hell of a lot of story into the almost 11 hours of plot. The narrator, James Patrick Cronin, did a great job of voicing the characters and making each unique and for the most part, believable.
There were some more obvious jokes and cliches relied upon, but nothing that stopped me from listening. All up, I'd certainly give any other books written by Logan J. Hunder consideration for a listen.
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- Susi
- 09-14-20
Awesome.
Not your usual read but well worth it. I don't usually like spoofs but this is well done. Very well written and the narrator did a great job.
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- Amcabby
- 09-16-20
Nice surprise
Glad I stumbled upon this book. I caught myself snickering & LOL several times! Enjoyed the narrator.
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- Toni
- 09-19-20
Everybody!
I loved this weird and funny book. I really hope to see more of these characters in the future and would could definitely see this being at least a limited series on Netflix.
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- michael
- 09-17-20
Entertaining and amusing.
An unusual fantasy story that kept me listening Very good narration. I look forward to more from the author.
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- Surp Addy
- 03-17-21
Easy listening
Narration brought the story to life. Utterly talented voice over. Kudos to both and gold star to the narrator.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-27-20
SURPRISING GEM
This was a fun satirical fantasy. Once i figured out it WAS satirical, I just let go and enjoyed it very much. The author is very clever. Lighthearted adventure and a pleasant surprise.
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- Kanea
- 01-09-22
Predictable but Enjoyable
The narrator did a fun job with the voices, the story at times can feel either rushed or slow, but surprisingly it got quite a few chuckles out of me. My favorite characters are Captain Nobeard and the tag along minstrel Jiminey for sure. All in all, the narrator did such a steady job I'm going to give another book he reads a shot.
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