
Carpet Diem
Or...How to Save the World by Accident
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Narrated by:
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Matthew Lloyd Davies
About this listen
Fifteen years after losing most of his family to a devastating, pudding-related tragedy, Simon Debovar has settled into a life of self-imposed exile from the stinking, selfish morass of humanity. Content that his daily highlights will include hazelnut coffee, a long bath, and the occasional jar of olives, his life is completely upturned by the discovery that his ornate living room carpet is the deciding factor in a bet between God and Satan.
When mysteriously well-timed carpet thieves deprive him of the crucial heirloom, Simon is forced to leave his hermit's existence behind for a world of angels, demons, witches, and immortals.
And then it gets complicated.
©2015 Justin Lee Anderson (P)2017 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
When Jonathon Fairfax accidentally helps a murderer bump off Sarah Morecambe, the secretary of a senior politician, he sets off a chain of events that astonishes him. Jonathon is wrong-footed by even the most everyday things, so he's particularly startled to find himself caught up in a conspiracy that goes right to the heart of government. Teaming up with a suave private investigator, a glamorous granny and the probable love of his life, Jonathon must confront his greatest fears - including talking to girls and balaclava-clad killers - and answer some very difficult questions.
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Great story with LOL moments
- By Bethany on 12-11-20
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Plain Heathen Mischief
- By: Martin Clark
- Narrated by: David Aaron Baker
- Length: 19 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Plain Heathen Mischief ups the existential ante, as Joel King, a defrocked Baptist minister, finds life even more bedeviling once he's served six months for a career-ending crime he might not even have committed. Now his incommunicado wife wants a divorce, the teenage vixen of his disgrace is suing him for a cool $5 million, a fresh start in Montana offers no hope for ex-cons of any religious persuasion, and the refuge provided by his sister turns as nasty as his parole officer. Talk about a crisis of faith.
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Brilliant!
- By squishy on 02-05-20
By: Martin Clark
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The Last Adventure of Constance Verity
- By: A. Lee Martinez
- Narrated by: Cynthia Farrell
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Constance Verity has been saving the world since she was seven, and she's sick of it. She sets off on one last adventure to reset her destiny and become the one thing she's never been: ordinary. Ever since she was granted a wish at birth by her fairy godmother, Constance Verity has become the world's great adventurer. She is a master of martial arts and a keen detective and possesses a collection of strange artifacts. Constance has spent the past 28 years saving the world, and she's tired of it.
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Baffled by the enthusiasm
- By Michael Linehan on 07-24-16
By: A. Lee Martinez
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The Supervillain Handbook
- The Ultimate How-to Guide to Destruction and Mayhem
- By: King Oblivion PhD, Matt Wilson - read to
- Narrated by: Richard Allen
- Length: 3 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Looking for a way out of the rat race? Tired of your ho-hum, workaday life? Have an inexplicable love of turning human beings into inanimate objects? Then professional supervillainy might just be for you! With tips from the renowned founder and overlord of the International Society of Supervillains, The Supervillain Handbook is your one-stop-shop for everything evil. Gain invaluable insight on the art of revenge, choosing your evil name, where to find the perfect lair, and much more!
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all time best narrator performance
- By AE on 10-14-20
By: King Oblivion PhD, and others
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Coyote Blue
- By: Christopher Moore
- Narrated by: James Jenner
- Length: 10 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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With New York Times best-sellers like Bloodsucking Fiends to his credit, Christopher Moore has developed a devoted cult following. Coyote Blue introduces Samuel Hunter, a young man who's running from his past while being tormented by an ancient Crow God with a talent for mischief.
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ehhhh...
- By Michelle on 08-17-09
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The Rose Well Files
- A Tale of Woozles and UFOs
- By: David Luddington
- Narrated by: Nigel Planer
- Length: 9 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Rose Well Holiday Park needs a hero. This once shining icon of the Great British Holiday Camp is dying and the last residents are more interested in preparing for a zombie apocalypse or fighting off imaginary UFOs than playing crazy golf or bingo. In addition, a foreign bottled water company is attempting to force a sale so they can seize the last asset of Rose Well Park, the Rose Well Spring. What Rose Well Park could probably do without is a hero whose belief in a better tomorrow far outweighs any of his past achievements. But William Fox is all they have.
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Not a total waste of time
- By Amazon Customer on 03-09-25
By: David Luddington
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Dead Famous
- An Unexpected History of Celebrity from Bronze Age to Silver Screen
- By: Greg Jenner
- Narrated by: Greg Jenner
- Length: 12 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Celebrity, with its neon glow and selfie pout, strikes us as hypermodern. But the famous and infamous have been thrilling, titillating, and outraging us for much longer than we might realize. Whether it was the scandalous Lord Byron, whose poetry sent female fans into an erotic frenzy; or the cheetah-owning, coffin-sleeping, one-legged French actress Sarah Bernhardt, who launched a violent feud with her former best friend; or Edmund Kean, the dazzling Shakespearean actor whose monstrous ego and terrible alcoholism saw him nearly murdered by his own audience....
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Wonderful Performance!
- By Leanna Humble on 11-01-24
By: Greg Jenner
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The Strange Case of the Moderate Extremists
- By: Alexander McCall Smith
- Narrated by: David Rintoul
- Length: 2 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Detective Ulf Varg from the Department of Sensitive Crimes is often called upon to investigate unusual matters. But rarely is he asked to conduct an inquiry on behalf of his own family. Is such a thing ethical? Adding to Ulf's moral discomfort is the fact that he does not exactly see eye to eye with his younger brother Bjorn - a leading player in one of Sweden's right-wing parties, the Moderate Extremists. Still, family is family, so Ulf finds himself working to uncover the mole leaking secrets to a rival party, the Extreme Moderates.
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I wanted to know who did what.
- By A. Bohn on 07-31-20
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Paranormal Real Estate
- Dirk Cooper, Book 1
- By: Matthew Howry
- Narrated by: Scott Aiello
- Length: 9 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
The problems in Dirk Cooper's life were ghosts, money and the Mob. The solution was real estate. Join notable hobo Dirk Cooper as he lies, cheats and steals his way through life, desperate to recover the things he lost during the housing crash of 2008. When he is approached by a wealthy and powerful man with haunted houses to sell, Dirk thinks his troubles are over. Things are not as they seemed, however, and soon he is caught up in a web of dark magic and danger the likes of which he has never encountered before.
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really refreshing, can't wait for more
- By riley on 05-13-22
By: Matthew Howry
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Skin Tight
- By: Carl Hiaasen
- Narrated by: George Wilson
- Length: 14 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
This novel by Carl Hiaasen, author of Tourist Season and Native Tongue, begins as most thrillers do, with a killing. But this is no everyday, hum-drum, garden variety killing. Our hero, Nick Stranahan, a 42-year-old private investigator who has killed five men and been married five times, skewers his attacker's aorta with the razor-sharp bill of a stuffed marlin.
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Skintight
- By Chris on 08-02-04
By: Carl Hiaasen
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The Eiger Sanction
- By: Trevanian
- Narrated by: Joe Barrett
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
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In a renovated Gothic church on Long Island lives Jonathan Hemlock, an art professor and a world-renowned mountain climber who finances his black-market art collection by working as a freelance assassin. Now, Hemlock is being tricked into a hazardous assignment that involves an attempt to scale one of the most treacherous mountain peaks in the Swiss Alps: the Eiger. His target is one of his three fellow climbers. The problem is that the CII can't tell him which one.
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Great story, great narration
- By Andrew on 05-14-09
By: Trevanian
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Damned
- By: Chuck Palahniuk
- Narrated by: Sophie Amoss
- Length: 7 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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The daughter of a narcissistic film star and a billionaire, Madison is abandoned at her Swiss boarding school over Christmas, while her parents are off touting their new projects and adopting more orphans. She dies over the holiday of a marijuana overdose - and the next thing she knows, she’s in Hell.
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Delightful
- By Kimberly S. on 03-04-22
By: Chuck Palahniuk
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The Substitution Order
- By: Martin Clark
- Narrated by: David Aaron Baker
- Length: 13 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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From Martin Clark - praised by Entertainment Weekly as "our best legal-thriller writer" - comes a wickedly clever, tenderhearted, and intricately plotted novel about a hard-luck lawyer's refusal to concede defeat, even as fate, the court system, and a gang of untouchable con artists conspire against him.
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Poor Poor (Brilliant!) Kevin
- By Meg on 07-10-19
By: Martin Clark
Entertaining with Great Narrator
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Super funny!
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Bizarrely fun
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Fantasy about nothing serious but also about the most important stuff in life.
Taty
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Enjoyable ride
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a good but long story.
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Brilliant!!!!
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engaging and hilarious read
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Incredible
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The narrator does an excellent job of handling all the different characters’ very different voices.
I highly recommend this audio book!
Devilishly Good
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