
Tell Me What You Want
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Narrated by:
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Justin J. Lehmiller
About this listen
A leading expert on human sexuality and author of the blog Sex and Psychology offers an unprecedented look at sexual fantasy based on the most comprehensive, scientific survey ever undertaken.
What do Americans really want when it comes to sex? And is it possible for us to get what we want? Justin J. Lehmiller, one of the country's leading experts on human sexuality and author of the popular blog Sex and Psychology, has made it his career's ambition to answer these questions. He recently concluded the largest and most comprehensive scientific survey of Americans' sexual fantasies ever undertaken, a monumental two-year study involving more than 4,000 Americans from all walks of life, answering questions of unusual scope.
Based on this study, Tell Me What You Want offers an unprecedented look into our fantasy worlds and what they reveal about us. It helps readers to better understand their own sexual desires and how to attain them within their relationships, but also to appreciate why the desires of their partners may be so incredibly different.
If we only better understood the incredible diversity of human sexual desire and why this diversity exists in the first place, we would experience less distress, anxiety, and shame about our own sexual fantasies and better understand why our partners often have sexual proclivities that are so different from our own. Ultimately, this book will help readers to enhance their sex lives and to maintain more satisfying relationships and marriages in the future by breaking down barriers to discussing sexual fantasies and allowing them to become a part of readers' sexual realities.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2018 Justin J. Lehmiller (P)2018 Hachette AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Lehmiller's smart, warm, sex-positive book breaks the toxic silence around our sexual fantasies. Reading it may be the best thing you ever do for your sex life, your relationships and your self-acceptance." (Geoffrey Miller, author of The Mating Mind, Spent, and Mate)
"Lehmiller's groundbreaking book points to an alarming divide between the conversations we're having about sex and the conversation we should be having about sex. It provides the nudge we need to change the conversation - and, in doing so, to live healthier, hotter lives." (Eli J. Finkel, professor of psychology, Northwestern University)
"A penetrating, erotic X-ray into the hidden recesses of our sexual psyches. Illuminating and incisive, Lehmiller lays bare the gray matter of great sex." (Ian Kerner, PhD, New York Times best-selling author of She Comes First)
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The Ultimate Guide to Sexual Fantasy
- How to Have Incredible Sex with Role Play, Sex Games, Erotic Massage, BDSM and More (Ultimate Guides)
- By: Violet Blue
- Narrated by: Lia Langola
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Join the legions of couples and singles who are making their hottest sexual fantasies come true. Whether you're looking for an endless supply of fantasy ideas or expert advice for a playful, imaginative sex life that turns you both on, this information-packed book has everything you need to know.
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SOOOOOOO GOOOOOD!!!! A+++++++
- By Kim BookJunkie, Editor/Proofreader on 03-04-15
By: Violet Blue
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She Comes First
- A Guide for Sassy Women Who Want to Get Back in Control of Their Life
- By: Brian Nox
- Narrated by: Jerod McBrayer
- Length: 3 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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An empowering audiobook about standing your ground in dating, in marriage, in your career, and anywhere else. As an author and a coach who has been helping women for more than a decade, I noticed some women were in trouble. But there are women out there who have designed the life they live. I call these women high-value women. It turns out the high-value woman follows a set of strategies and principles. I'll share them with you throughout this audiobook.
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Impressively Useful
- By Trevor medbery on 02-27-18
By: Brian Nox
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Open Deeply
- A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships
- By: Kate Loree
- Narrated by: Carol Jacobanis
- Length: 12 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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A full one-fifth of the United States has engaged in consensual non-monogamy (CNM) at some point in their lives, and 29 percent of adults under 30 today consider open relationships to be morally acceptable—yet there are few resources to turn to when it comes to navigating this more non-traditional and explorative territory.
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Very important book
- By J. Oakley on 12-13-22
By: Kate Loree
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The Loving Dominant
- By: John Warren, Libby Warren
- Narrated by: Anastasia Watley
- Length: 10 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Previous editions of The Loving Dominant taught more than 40,000 people the fundamentals of safe, affectionate dominance and submission. Now, John and Libby Warren, two of the scene's most respected educators, have updated this seminal work for a new generation of practitioners. Includes an all-new chapter on partner-finding, plus new information on electricity play, ethical play with multiple partners, water sports, kinky digital photography, and more!
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I'm completely a novice, but this opened my eyes
- By Nismo240 on 05-09-19
By: John Warren, and others
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You Are Not Broken
- Stop “Should-Ing” All over Your Sex Life
- By: Kelly Casperson M.D.
- Narrated by: Kelly Casperson M.D.
- Length: 5 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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In You Are Not Broken, Dr. Kelly Caperson offers a unique perspective as a urologist, coach, and fellow woman wondering, when it comes to sex, "Is this all there is?" Dr. Casperson explores how to adjust your mindset and provides an in-depth look at what makes women physiologically unique. Better sex creates a better relationship between you and your partner. With real-life stories, ideas for journaling, and tips to get the conversation going, this book is the sex empowerment secret weapon you really need to live the life you've always wanted.
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excellent
- By kris racer on 03-31-25
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The Anxious Person’s Guide to Non-Monogamy
- Your Guide to Open Relationships, Polyamory and Letting Go
- By: Lola Phoenix, Kathy G. Slaughter LCSW
- Narrated by: Lola Phoenix
- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Embarking on a non-monogamous relationship can be a daunting experience, opening old wounds that cause anxiety, fear and confusion, something Lola Phoenix knows about all too well. In this all-you-need-to-know guide to exploring non-monogamy, polyamory and open relationships, Lola draws upon their years of experience in giving advice and being non-monogamous to provide guidance for every stage of your journey, helping you to prioritise your mental health and well being along the way.
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vulnerability and transparent narrative
- By Amazon Customer on 05-07-25
By: Lola Phoenix, and others
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Sex at Dawn
- How We Mate, Why We Stray, and What It Means for Modern Relationships
- By: Christopher Ryan, Cacilda Jetha
- Narrated by: Allyson Johnson, Jonathan Davis, Christopher Ryan (Preface)
- Length: 10 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. Mainstream science - as well as religious and cultural institutions - has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing....
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Strawmen and Ad Hominems
- By Carolyn on 09-18-12
By: Christopher Ryan, and others
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My Secret Garden
- Women's Sexual Fantasies
- By: Nancy Friday
- Narrated by: Cindy Harden, Annie Hinkle, Raquel Harris, and others
- Length: 13 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Nancy Friday's taboo-shattering best seller My Secret Garden is the most popular and controversial book of women's sexual fantasies ever published. Women who feared their erotic fantasies called it scandalous. Women who recognized their own fantasies in its pages, rejoiced. Outspoken, graphic, vulnerable and shameless, My Secret Garden is a classic study of female sexuality. Friday interviewed hundreds of women from every part of the country to learn their sexual private thoughts, and she listened like no one else.
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Great read! Even for men!
- By Thomas Carter on 12-31-18
By: Nancy Friday
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The Erotic Mind
- Unlocking the Inner Sources of Passion and Fulfillment
- By: Jack Morin PhD
- Narrated by: Matthew Boston
- Length: 12 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Challenging accepted theories about what makes for terrific sex, The Erotic Mind is a breakthrough exploration of the least understood dimensions of human sexuality - the psychology of desire, arousal, and fulfillment. Sex therapist Dr. Jack Morin offers a new perspective that celebrates the joys of Eros without denying its risks. Based on an in-depth analysis of over 1,000 provocative stories of peak sexual experiences, The Erotic Mind offers clear, accessible guidance on how anyone can utilize their own peak encounters and fantasies as powerful tools of self-discovery.
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The BEST book in sex and psychology
- By Jesse Malan on 09-07-24
By: Jack Morin PhD
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No Holes Barred
- A Dual Manifesto of Sexual Exploration and Power
- By: Mandii B, Weezy WTF, Tempest X
- Narrated by: Mandii B, Weezy WTF
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
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Mandii B and WeezyWTF, hosts of the Decisions, Decisions (formerly WHOREible Decisions) podcast, deliver a bold, unfiltered, and raw, sex-positive collection of relatable tales. They tackle everything from pleasure to pain and the journey of healing through progression to reclaim your personal and sexual power.
By: Mandii B, and others
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Mating in Captivity
- Reconciling the Erotic & the Domestic
- By: Esther Perel
- Narrated by: Esther Perel
- Length: 8 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Esther Perel takes on tough questions, grappling with the obstacles and anxieties that arise when our quest for secure love conflicts with our pursuit of passion. She invites us to explore the paradoxical union of domesticity and sexual desire, and explains what it takes to bring lust home.
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Slices of life
- By Eric on 12-03-18
By: Esther Perel
This book helped me understand my own fantasies and provided insight into the fantasies of my partner. I cannot recommend highly enough! If you only have one credit, use it on this book!
Insightful and entertaining!
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Informative
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This book is life-changing
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Wow, I am full
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Interesting.
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Clear and scientific read
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love the book, but I can't find the pdf?
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Educational, informative fact based book!
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Thanks to the author for putting this book together!
Enlightening
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If you only read one book on sex, read this one.
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