Collaborating with the Enemy
How to Work with People You Don't Agree with or Like or Trust
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Narrated by:
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Jeff Hoyt
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By:
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Adam Kahane
About this listen
We're trying to get something done that really matters to us. To do this we need to work with others. But these others include people we don't agree with or like or trust, so working with them seems impossible - like collaborating with the enemy. What can we do?
International consultant Adam Kahane, whose work has been praised by Nobel Peace Prize winners Nelson Mandela and Juan Manuel Santos, has faced this challenge many times in working both on big issues, like economic restructuring, climate change, and civil war, and on ordinary issues within organizations and families. He has come to understand that everything we think we know about collaboration - that it requires a harmonious team that agrees on where it's going and how it's going to get there - is wrong. On the contrary, the only way to get things done with diverse others is to abandon harmony, agreement, and control and to learn to work with discord, experimentation, and genuine cocreation.
Kahane proposes a new approach to collaboration - stretch collaboration - that is built on this insight. He offers examples of how he's helped people apply it in all kinds of tough situations throughout the world. This approach requires stepping forward with openness and commitment, as in the words of poet Antonio Machado, "Walker, there is no path. The path is made by walking."
As our societies have become more polarized and globalized and our organizations have become less hierarchical, more of us need to collaborate across more heterogeneous groups than ever before. This means that increasingly often we face situations where conventional collaboration does not work. Kahane's book offers a proven and practical approach to getting things done in such complex and conflictual contexts. It could not be more timely.
©2017 Adam Kahane (P)2017 Adam KahaneListeners also enjoyed...
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Research indicates that emotional intelligence (EI) accounts for an astonishing 70-80 percent of management success. Technical expertise just isn't enough anymore: Project managers need strong interpersonal skills and the ability to recognize emotional cues in order to lead their teams to success. Emotional Intelligence for Project Managers introduces listeners to all facets of EI and shows how emotions can be leveraged to meet project goals.
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Fantastic Book!
- By Anonymous User on 04-09-21
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Questions Are the Answer
- A Breakthrough Approach to Your Most Vexing Problems at Work and in Life
- By: Hal Gregersen
- Narrated by: Rick Adamson
- Length: 8 hrs and 45 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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For innovation and leadership guru Hal Gregersen, the power of questions has always been clear - but it took some years for the follow-on question to hit him: If so much depends on fresh questions, shouldn’t we know more about how to arrive at them? That sent him on a research quest ultimately including more than 200 interviews with creative thinkers. Questions Are the Answer delivers the insights Gregersen gained about the conditions that give rise to catalytic questions - and breakthrough insights - and how anyone can create them.
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All you need is the title
- By Bob Jordy on 01-13-22
By: Hal Gregersen
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No Ego
- How Leaders Can Cut the Cost of Workplace Drama, End Entitlement, and Drive Big Results
- By: Cy Wakeman
- Narrated by: Cynthia Farrell
- Length: 4 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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No Ego is about increasing awareness of just how often individuals are operating out of ego at work, breeding drama and discord rather than innovation and constructive collaboration. It is high time to reinvent leadership thinking. The current work experience is so full of emotional waste that it's seen as a foregone cost in today's business environments. Cy Wakeman teaches straightforward strategies in which this time and energy can be re-commissioned and put toward the value that hired talent is intended to provide.
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It's a good dose of reality, but not enough...
- By Phaethon on 02-25-20
By: Cy Wakeman
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Making Ideas Happen
- Overcoming the Obstacles Between Vision and Reality
- By: Scott Belsky
- Narrated by: Don Hagen
- Length: 7 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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How the world's leading innovators push their ideas to fruition, time and time again. Edison famously said that genius is 1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration. Ideas for new businesses, solutions to the world's problems, and artistic breakthroughs are common, but great execution is rare. According to Scott Belsky, the capacity to make ideas happen can be strengthened by anyone willing to build their organizational habits and harness the forces of community.
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Terrible Narrator
- By Charl on 07-12-12
By: Scott Belsky
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Secrets to Winning at Office Politics
- How to Achieve Your Goals and Increase Your Influence at Work
- By: Marie G. McIntyre PhD
- Narrated by: Margaret Strom
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Whether you are a new player or a seasoned veteran, Secrets to Winning at Office Politics can help you increase your personal power without compromising your integrity or taking advantage of others. This smart, practical guide shows you how to stop wasting energy on things you can't change and start taking steps to get what you want.
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Amateur.
- By Christie on 08-11-18
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Winning from Within
- A Breakthrough Method for Leading, Living, and Lasting Change
- By: Erica Ariel Fox
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Life is a series of negotiations, whether or not you think of yourself as a negotiator. From seemingly insignificant daily decisions to major life choices, you negotiate every time you aim to persuade, argue over a decision, or resolve a conflict. But as negotiations and leadership expert Erica Ariel Fox reveals, the most important negotiations - the ones that determine the impact of our actions and the quality of our lives - are those we have with ourselves.
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Enlightening is an understatement
- By Lucas on 01-13-19
By: Erica Ariel Fox
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Leading with Cultural Intelligence, Second Editon
- The Real Secret to Success
- By: David Livermore
- Narrated by: Tim Andres Pabon
- Length: 7 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Business today is global - and success requires a new set of skills. But not to worry, whether you're negotiating with vendors in Asia, exploring potential markets in Africa, or leading a diverse team at home, you don't have to master the nuances of every culture you encounter. With cultural intelligence, or CQ, you can lead effectively in any context.
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good 101, but not more
- By V. Taras on 04-21-16
By: David Livermore
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How Did That Happen?
- Holding People Accountable for Results the Positive, Principled Way
- By: Roger Connors, Tom Smith
- Narrated by: Lloyd James
- Length: 9 hrs and 53 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Drawing on case studies, many from client companies, the authors show how to establish clear expectations and manage the unmet expectations that inevitably occur. And they offer a positive, principled way that engages hearts and minds. This book can help people at every level---from senior executives to front-line workers---enjoy greater productivity, profitability, and job satisfaction.
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HELP - How Can I Get The Lost Hours Back ?
- By Mike on 09-23-09
By: Roger Connors, and others
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Originals
- How Non-Conformists Move the World
- By: Adam Grant, Sheryl Sandberg - foreword
- Narrated by: Fred Sanders, Susan Denaker
- Length: 10 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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With Give and Take, Adam Grant not only introduced a landmark new paradigm for success but also established himself as one of his generation’s most compelling and provocative thought leaders. In Originals he again addresses the challenge of improving the world, but now from the perspective of becoming original: choosing to champion novel ideas and values that go against the grain, battle conformity, and buck outdated traditions. How can we originate new ideas, policies, and practices without risking it all?
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Interesting, but not science
- By Lloyd Fassett on 03-14-16
By: Adam Grant, and others
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Organizational Culture and Leadership, Fifth Edition
- By: Edgar H. Schein, Peter Schein
- Narrated by: Noah Michael Levine
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Organizational Culture and Leadership is the classic reference for managers and students seeking a deeper understanding of the inter-relationship of organizational culture dynamics and leadership. Author Edgar Schein is the 'father' of organizational culture, world-renowned for his expertise and research in the field; in this book, he analyzes and illustrates through cases the abstract concept of culture and shows its importance to the management of organizational change.
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Terrible listening experience
- By Ashley on 01-26-19
By: Edgar H. Schein, and others
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Bargaining with the Devil
- When to Negotiate, When to Fight
- By: Robert Mnookin
- Narrated by: Robert Mnookin
- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
- Abridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
One of the country's most eminent practitioners of the art and science of negotiation offers practical advice for the most challenging conflicts - when you are facing an adversary you don't trust, who may harm you, or who you may even feel is evil. The head of Harvard's famed Program on Negotiation, Robert Mnookin provides tools for confronting devils of all kinds - in business, politics, and family life.
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Morally questionable
- By Dave on 01-22-19
By: Robert Mnookin
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A Journey
- My Political Life
- By: Tony Blair
- Narrated by: Tony Blair
- Length: 16 hrs and 4 mins
- Abridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
This is Tony Blair’s firsthand account of his years in office and beyond. Here he describes for the first time his role in shaping our recent history, from the aftermath of Princess Diana’s death to the war on terror. He reveals the decisions necessary to reinvent his party, the relationships with colleagues including Gordon Brown, the negotiations for peace in Northern Ireland, the implementation of the biggest reforms to public services in Britain since 1945, and his relationships with leaders on the world stage.
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History can only ever be accepted judgments
- By W. J. Young on 09-14-10
By: Tony Blair
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For some kids, school offers a positive and engaging experience. For others, it's a boring, stressful, and frustrating waste of time. If your child is in the second category, why keep tormenting them? Instead, why not help them find an educational environment where they feel genuinely motivated, excited, and empowered? In this eye-opening book, Blake Boles makes the case for leaving conventional school and taking one of the many alternative paths through K-12 that exist today.
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eye opening/ must read for every parent
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Book is fully disinterested in male laborers
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How to Lead in a World of Distraction
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While many leaders have learned to tune out distractions that keep them from being productive, they remain deaf to their inner desires and emotions. In How to Lead in a World of Distraction, Clay Scroggins teaches leaders four simple habits that create space for emotional evaluation and exploration. These helpful practices will empower leaders to replace the chaos of their busy days with emotional competence and awareness that leads to a calmer, more fulfilling life.
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Turn Down for WHAT?!?
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What listeners say about Collaborating with the Enemy
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Dr. T.
- 05-05-23
Interestingly, impactful
I found the book to be interesting and useful in changing one’s mindset. But the way to get there was not fully flushed out. It is more of an invitation to seek self discovery. But I’m not sure I would call it a how to book. I am encouraged to approach my own concept of collaboration differently.
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1 person found this helpful
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- mlff
- 07-04-18
Simple, yet critical shift in perspective
This book offers a simple, yet a critical shift in perspective. In an increasingly complex world where agendas are unlikely to align, an essential skill is to be able to align actions for mutual benefit instead. In just a few hours this book helped me see that collective progress is more valuable than shared purpose. Highly recommended!
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3 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 06-01-24
The book wasn’t what I expected
I thought the book was mostly antidotal. I’m had to stop listening at the 4th chapter and I haven’t really learned anything new so far. The author enjoys talking about how smart they are so I think the message of lowering expectations of having it your way and seeking to forge a joint path forward may have been a bit muddled for me.
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- Reba
- 06-26-22
Last chapter the best advice
Last chapter has timeless, excellent advice for all, for all situations.
I didn’t get much out of the beginning of book. Glad I continued to the end. Shows I’m already on my way to being open to listen to others thoroughly.
Definitely a keeper book! Refresher from time to time.
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- Tya
- 11-10-24
Force, adapt, exit or collaborate.
Enjoyed perspective. If you’re not part of the problem then you can’t be part of the solution. Less energy on blaming. More energy on doing your part.
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- Dale
- 11-24-20
Interesting concept but short on details
While the concept this author offers is interesting and unique, he falls way short of providing details on how to implement it.
He does give a conceptual outline and interesting stories that support the model however does not provide a framework on how to implement it on your own.
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- Anonymous User
- 08-06-21
A Go-To Book
Found myself re-listening to pieces to really take in the content. This is one that you'll come back to a few times to refine the value you get.
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- Anonymous User
- 12-21-23
not exactly what I was looking for
the book didn't touch on some of the areas it's summary indicated. I picked up a few ideas but overall it left me wanting something different.
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- Anonymous User
- 04-16-24
Very good book
Very well structured, and delivered. Very helpful and practical. I loved it. My best read of 2024.
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- MM
- 11-11-18
A practical approach on collaboration
The myth of collaboration equivalent to full agreement is debunked by Adam Kahane in this work. The author uses examples of high stakes and very complex negotiations to show that collaborating/negotiating is not about reaching a given result or persuading others to your point of view but about the ability to move forward, one step at a time. This book is not about easy wins in negotiation but about negotiations that endure.
#collaboration #negotiation #Tagsgiving #sweepstakes
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2 people found this helpful