Friend and Foe
When to Cooperate, When to Compete, and How to Succeed at Both
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Narrated by:
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Tom Perkins
About this listen
In Friend and Foe, researchers Galinsky and Schweitzer explain why this debate misses the mark. Rather than being hardwired to compete or cooperate, humans have evolved to do both. It is only by learning how to strike the right balance between these two forces that we can improve our long-term relationships and get more of what we want.
Galinsky and Schweitzer draw on original, cutting-edge research across the social sciences to show how to maximize success in work and in life by deftly navigating between cooperation and competition. They offer insights into topics ranging from how to get and keep power, how to recognize deception and build trust, how to turn our weaknesses into strengths, and when to begin a negotiation to get the best outcome - while ensuring that our counterparts walk away wanting to negotiate with us down the road.
And along the way, they pose and offer surprising answers to a number of perplexing puzzles: When too much talent undermines a team's or company's success; when acting less competently helps you gain status; why many gender differences in the workplace may simply be power differences in disguise; why ending an auction at 2:00 a.m. can get you the best outcome; how our best intentions can ironically make us appear racist; and why husbands gain weight during pregnancy. We perform at our very best when cooperation and competition are held in the right balance. This audiobook is a guide for better navigating our social world by learning when to cooperate as a friend and when to compete as a foe - and how to be better at both.
©2015 By arrangement with Crown Business, an imprint of Crown Publishing Group, a division of Random House, Inc. (P)2015 HighBridge, a division of Recorded BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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- By Andre on 04-18-17
By: Robert H. Frank
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Leadership BS
- Fixing Workplaces and Careers One Truth at a Time
- By: Jeffrey Pfeffer
- Narrated by: Mike Chamberlain
- Length: 7 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In Leadership BS Jeffrey Pfeffer shines a bright light on the leadership industry, showing why it's failing and how it might be remade. He sets the record straight on the oft-made prescriptions for leaders to be honest, authentic, and modest; tell the truth; build trust; and take care of others. By calling BS on so many of the stories and myths of leadership, he gives people a more scientific look at the evidence and better information to guide their careers.
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Antidote to Bromides from Leadership Gurus
- By Sean Lannan on 09-23-15
By: Jeffrey Pfeffer
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The Secret Handshake
- Mastering the Politics of the Business Inner Circle
- By: Kathleen Kelley Reardon
- Narrated by: Ruth Ann Phimister
- Length: 8 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Drawing on interviews with executives from Fortune 500 companies, Kathleen Kelley Reardon has compiled essential advice on how to break into the inner circle of power at the top of the corporate ladder. Many books cover practical business knowledge, but few address the issue of interpersonal skills. The ever-changing circle of power within a corporation may not necessarily follow the same guidelines it publicly professes. The most talented employee isn't always the one promoted; there is an intangible quality the upper echelon look for.
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This book EXCELLENT!!!
- By Amazon Customer on 01-26-24
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Executive Presence
- The Missing Link between Merit and Success
- By: Sylvia Ann Hewlett
- Narrated by: Rosalind Ashford
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Do you exude confidence and credibility? Can you command a room? Sylvia Ann Hewlett, one of the world's most influential business thinkers, cracks the code of Executive Presence (EP) for men and women intent on winning the next plum assignment and doing something extraordinary with their lives. You might have the qualifications to be considered for your dream job, but you won't get far unless you can signal that you're "leadership material" and that you "have what it takes."
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Disappointing
- By Marisol on 03-12-17
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In Defense of Troublemakers
- The Power of Dissent in Life and Business
- By: Charlan Nemeth
- Narrated by: Joyce Bean
- Length: 6 hrs and 2 mins
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We've decided by consensus that consensus is good. In In Defense of Troublemakers, psychologist Charlan Nemeth argues that this principle is completely wrong: left unchallenged, the majority opinion is often biased, unoriginal, or false. It leads planes and markets to crash, causes juries to convict innocent people, and can quite literally make people think blue is green. In the name of comity, we embrace stupidity. We can make better decisions by embracing dissent. Dissent forces us to question the status quo, consider more information, and engage in creative decision-making.
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A Good Review of Group Thinking
- By J. Justice on 03-20-24
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Bargaining with the Devil
- When to Negotiate, When to Fight
- By: Robert Mnookin
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- Length: 7 hrs and 44 mins
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One of the country's most eminent practitioners of the art and science of negotiation offers practical advice for the most challenging conflicts - when you are facing an adversary you don't trust, who may harm you, or who you may even feel is evil. The head of Harvard's famed Program on Negotiation, Robert Mnookin provides tools for confronting devils of all kinds - in business, politics, and family life.
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Morally questionable
- By Dave on 01-22-19
By: Robert Mnookin
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Women Don't Ask
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When Linda Babcock asked why so many male graduate students were teaching their own courses and most female students were assigned as assistants, her dean said: "More men ask. The women just don't ask." It turns out that whether they want higher salaries or more help at home, women often find it hard to ask.
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Interresting subject, bad delivery.
- By Guilherme on 01-11-14
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Winning from Within
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- By: Erica Ariel Fox
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- Length: 10 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Life is a series of negotiations, whether or not you think of yourself as a negotiator. From seemingly insignificant daily decisions to major life choices, you negotiate every time you aim to persuade, argue over a decision, or resolve a conflict. But as negotiations and leadership expert Erica Ariel Fox reveals, the most important negotiations - the ones that determine the impact of our actions and the quality of our lives - are those we have with ourselves.
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Enlightening is an understatement
- By Lucas on 01-13-19
By: Erica Ariel Fox
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The Art of Strategy
- A Game Theorist's Guide to Success in Business and Life
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Game theory means rigorous strategic thinking. It’s the art of anticipating your opponent’s next moves, knowing full well that your rival is trying to do the same thing to you. Though parts of game theory involve simple common sense, much is counterintuitive, and it can only be mastered by developing a new way of seeing the world. Using a diverse array of rich case studies - from pop culture, TV, movies, sports, politics, and history - the authors show how nearly every business and personal interaction has a game-theory component to it.
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Completely misleading title
- By Motorjaw on 01-28-15
By: Barry J. Nalebuff, and others
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The Upside of Irrationality
- The Unexpected Benefits of Defying Logic at Work and at Home
- By: Dan Ariely
- Narrated by: Simon Jones
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
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In his groundbreaking book Predictably Irrational, social scientist Dan Ariely revealed the multiple biases that lead us into making unwise decisions. Now, in The Upside of Irrationality, he exposes the surprising negative and positive effects irrationality can have on our lives. Focusing on our behaviors at work and in relationships, he offers new insights and eye-opening truths about what really motivates us on the job.
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Not as good as the first
- By Stephen on 06-20-10
By: Dan Ariely
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Blind Spots
- Why We Fail to Do What’s Right and What to Do about It
- By: Max H. Bazerman, Ann E. Tenbrunsel
- Narrated by: Kate McQueen
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When confronted with an ethical dilemma, most of us like to think we would stand up for our principles. But we are not as ethical as we think we are. In Blind Spots, leading business ethicists Max Bazerman and Ann Tenbrunsel examine the ways we overestimate our ability to do what is right and how we act unethically without meaning to.
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Great book! Poor narration
- By Susie on 11-20-17
By: Max H. Bazerman, and others
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What listeners say about Friend and Foe
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Williamb
- 07-28-16
Incredibly useful
The content is very matter of fact. The narrator is too. The material is very useful. This may seem dry to you. If you skip it, it is your loss. The unadulterated nature of both the material and the narration give ample opportunity to absorb the facts. Listen and learn.
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- David Mcclish
- 03-23-16
Excellent guide for handling all interaction
Great insight into handling personal interactions. It help me understand having a competitive relationship and how to benefit from the interaction.
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- Lena
- 01-05-19
A lot of insights
There are still things I don’t necessarily agree with the author or I still have questions for him to clarify those points but overall this book provides maybe great insights. Some I absolutely agreed because they worked for me before in many occasions. Very helpful advice. I strongly recommend everyone reads this book. You may not agree to all but there’s still a lot of interesting information and great to consider.
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- Antonio T Smith Jr
- 04-26-16
Amazing Book
This book is absolutely amazing. It is filled with facts and great nerd-nuggets, just perfect for a nerd like me. I have learned so many new things reading this book. I have over 50 people who work or volunteer for me, and I consider myself an expert at relationships. So, to encounter a book that can teach me so many different things, and most of them new, it's just simply amazing.
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- A. Yoshida
- 02-08-17
Great tips on when to be friend or foe
This is a fascinating book about how humans have evolved to be both friend and foe. That is why there is brotherly love but yet also sibling rivalry. We could have friends that support us in need but they could also be the reasons why we strive to earn more, buy more, or do more - as we compete to outdo our friends. The book provides research and guidance on balancing these two forces. There are also interesting examples of friend/foe relationships. For example, star athletes on a team are competing against each other for power, which undermines the team's objective of winning the game. Sometimes having only one star athlete on a team is better than having two star athletes. There is also a useful chapter on detecting deception, understanding how core trust can be broken, and rebuilding trust in a relationship (unless it was a core trust that was broken).
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6 people found this helpful
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- GJM_FL
- 06-21-17
Material gets a LONG way from the Title
Is there anything you would change about this book?
The authors spend a LOT of time talking about sociological characteristics with very little indication about how that relates to the subject. Want to know how many hierarchical levels there are in the military? In the Catholic Church? You'll know when you're done reading this. Interested in gender or racial biases? I listened to a little more than half way and finally switched to another book.
Has Friend and Foe turned you off from other books in this genre?
No
Would you listen to another book narrated by Tom Perkins?
Yes
Did Friend and Foe inspire you to do anything?
No.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Eric
- 02-14-18
Some good stuff but a bit skewed
Any additional comments?
The book started off reminding me of Malcom Gladwell's books ... taking psych findings and applying them, but without focusing on a story. Around chapter 2 or 3 it seems to turn into a treatise on women's equality. I'm all for empowering women, but he went on and on about it. It also doesn't help that he used the misused quote about women making 77 cents for every dollar a man makes. (All things being equal, women make about 94 cents to a man's dollar, and economists don't know why.) I tried to continue reading but everything after that made me think he had an agenda ... or maybe it's that I'm a white male and some of the same reasoning he is using has been used by others that tried to empower women, blacks, and others but instead simply used it to lower white males.
I also didn't find much advice on how to apply the things he was saying. It's much more analysis and not so much guidance on how to do something.
On a different note, I thought the reading was done well. So if you buy into what he's saying it might be a good read for you.
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- Pritish
- 12-23-15
Second Half of the Book is Insightful
Good One... Must read for negotiators,sales, Business development, HR & Startups. You really see who and when you can go against and for with your friends and family
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12 people found this helpful
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- VerdereC
- 03-23-19
It's a Winner
Very Informative and engaging book. I learned a few new ideas which I'm looking to try out.
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- Garron Rose
- 01-05-16
Unexpected
My initial impression of this book is that it was weird. What I mean is that it's not exactly the book I was expecting to read. I had purchased the book looking for a refresher in negotiation. This book did eventually deliver that -- along with insights I'd not heard anywhere else -- but it took an unexpected path to get there, which made for an interesting journey.
The scope of this book is bigger than I expected. It took me a while to get in step with where they were going. This had more to do with my expectations than anything else. But the path they led me down was profitable. Negotiation is a big topic. Bigger still are the dynamics of trust. This book set negotiations on the backdrop of human interaction better than any I've experienced. There are several concepts that are worth the effort to purposeful application.
My current field of study is how to cultivate and curate intrinsic motivation within organizations and systems. The research on the negative and positive ramifications of empowerment in different social structures alone will get this book another listen from me.
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37 people found this helpful