Open
An Uncensored Memoir of Love, Liberation, and Non-Monogamy
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Narrated by:
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Rachel Krantz
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By:
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Rachel Krantz
About this listen
An award-winning journalist chronicles her first open relationship with “breathtaking honesty” (Los Angeles Times) in this “sexy, messy, necessary look at polyamory” (The Advocate).
FINALIST FOR THE LAMBDA LITERARY AWARD • ONE OF THE BEST BOOKS OF THE YEAR: PopSugar, Them
When Rachel Krantz met and fell for Adam, he told her that he was looking for a committed partnership—just one that did not include monogamy. Intrigued and more than a little nervous, Krantz decided to see whether their love could coexist with the freedom to date other people. Could they strike an exquisite balance between intimacy and independence, and find a way to feel passion for each other once the honeymoon phase ended?
Krantz documents her dive into polyamory, from Brooklyn sex parties to swinging and beyond, in her extraordinary debut memoir. As she attempts to write a new plot for her love story with Adam, she runs up against miscommunications, gaslighting, and ancient power dynamics, and seeks solid ground in a relationship where the rules are ever-shifting. An award-winning journalist, she interviewed scientists, psychologists, and people living and loving outside the mainstream as she searched to understand what polyamory would do to her heart, her mind, and her life.
With an unflinching eye and page-turning storytelling, Open is groundbreaking in both its documentarian approach to polyamory and its explicit subject matter. From debilitating anxiety spirals to heart-opening connections with the men and women she dates, Rachel puts her whole self on the line as she attempts to redefine what a relationship is—or could be.
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Critic reviews
“Open is . . . neither a manifesto of polyamorous ideals nor an argument against it. Instead, it’s Krantz’s sincere and curious reckoning with the cultural messaging we all receive about gendered expectations and power dynamics in romantic and sexual relationships in general . . .”—NPR
“[Krantz’s] breathtaking honesty in probing the serious downsides of polyamory while eschewing outmoded patriarchal codes of morality should allow for an overdue dialogue about what makes any relationship work.”—Los Angeles Times
“Titillating . . . Krantz sweeps readers into a narrative that seduces and educates in equal measure . . . [Open] offers an alluring and insightful look at a life lived outside of conventional structures.”—Publishers Weekly
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Not What I Thought It Would Be
- By Kevin on 05-06-16
By: Andrea Tantaros
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Us
- Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
- By: Terrence Real
- Narrated by: Terrence Real, Bruce Springsteen
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results.
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I preferred Fierce Intimacy
- By Jose on 06-23-22
By: Terrence Real
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Unrequited
- Women and Romantic Obsession
- By: Lisa A. Phillips
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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The summer Lisa A. Phillips turned 30, she fell in love with someone who didn't return her feelings. She soon became obsessed. She followed him around, called him compulsively, and talked about him endlessly. One desperate morning, after she snuck into his apartment building, he picked up a baseball bat to protect himself and began to dial 911. Her unrequited love had changed her from a sane, conscientious college teacher and radio reporter into someone she barely recognized.
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Great book! So-so narrator....
- By ToluGrace on 04-14-15
By: Lisa A. Phillips
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Sex with Shakespeare
- Here's Much to Do with Pain, but More with Love
- By: Jillian Keenan
- Narrated by: Jillian Keenan
- Length: 9 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Four hundred years after Shakespeare's death, Keenan's smart and passionate memoir brings new life to his work. With 14 of his plays as a springboard, she explores the many facets of love and sexuality - from desire and communication to fetish and fantasy. In A Midsummer Night's Dream, Keenan unmasks Helena as a sexual masochist - like Jillian herself. In Macbeth, she examines criminalized sexual identities and the dark side of "privacy".
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Innovative
- By Just Joe on 01-21-17
By: Jillian Keenan
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It's Not You
- 27 (Wrong) Reasons You're Single
- By: Sara Eckel
- Narrated by: Nina Alvamar
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on her popular Modern Love column, Sara Eckel’s It’s Not You challenges these myths, encouraging singletons to stop picking apart their personalities and to start tapping into their own wisdom about who and what is right for them. Supported by the latest psychological and sociological research, as well as interviews with people who have experienced longtime singledom, Eckel creates a strong and empowering argument to understand and accept that there’s no one reason why you’re single - you just are.
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Good Book
- By Anonymous User on 05-24-20
By: Sara Eckel
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An Intimate Life
- Sex, Love, and My Journey as a Surrogate Partner
- By: Cheryl Cohen-Greene
- Narrated by: Rebecca Gibel
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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For the past 40 years, Cheryl Cohen Greene has worked as a surrogate partner, helping clients to confront, consider, and ultimately accept their sexuality. In this riveting memoir, Cohen Greene shares some of her most moving cases, and also reveals her own sexual coming-of-age. Beginning with a rigid Catholic upbringing in the 1950s, where she was taught to think sex and sexual desires were unnatural and wrong, Cohen Greene struggled to reconcile her sexual identity.
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The Tender Memoir of a Sex Surrogate
- By Susie on 12-06-12
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Dirty Thirty
- By: Asa Akira
- Narrated by: Veronica Worthington
- Length: 5 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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As she contemplates turning 30 years old while still being in the adult film trade, Asa Akira, author of the best-seller Insatiable, delves into her past, present, and future, exploring the events that brought her to where she is now and the surprising and insightful plans she has for her future. Internationally known as a porn star, Akira's perceptive, funny, and straightforward writings on love, sex, death, marriage, and celebrity come together in a surprising book of essays.
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this was fun I'm going to buy her other book 2
- By Sir Lawrence on 01-09-19
By: Asa Akira
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It Takes One to Tango
- How I Rescued My Marriage with (Almost) No Help from My Spouse - and How You Can, Too
- By: Winifred M. Reilly MA MFT
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Conventional wisdom says that "it takes two" to turn a troubled marriage around and that both partners must have a shared commitment to change. So when couples can't agree on how - or whether - to make their marriage better, many give up or settle for a less-than-satisfying marriage (or think the only way out is divorce). Fortunately, there is an alternative. It Takes One to Tango is a groundbreaking guide that shows how one determined partner can spark lasting, significant change in a marriage.
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Great book!
- By colette on 05-08-17
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This Is Not Over
- A Novel
- By: Holly Brown
- Narrated by: Madeleine Maby, Donna Postel
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Two very different women with this in common: Each harbors her own secret, her own reason why she can't just let this go. Neither can yield, not before they've dredged up all that's hidden, even if it has the power to shatter all they've built.
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Pettiness Turn Twisted!
- By Jenn on 01-19-17
By: Holly Brown
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I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You
- Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship
- By: Andrew G. Marshall
- Narrated by: Andrew G. Marshall
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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For Young Women Only
- What You Need to Know About How Guys Think
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Lisa Author Rice
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Why are guys so weird? Unravel the mystery. A national scientific survey and in-depth personal interviews give you an unprecedented look inside the teenage male mind. Discover how: He'd be perfectly fine if he was loved by few and hated by many as long as he was respected by all. His ego is the size of Africa (but so are his insecurities). He hides his real feelings under a tough exterior.
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For Christians
- By R. Burdick on 07-18-09
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
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Super You
- Release Your Inner Superhero
- By: Emily Gordon
- Narrated by: Emily Gordon
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Superheroes don't start from glorious beginnings. Their origins are almost always marked by traumatic events that leave them helpless and scared. Batman witnessed his parents' murder. Superman was sent away from his dying planet with no one to guide him as he grew up. Orphaned Catwoman was forced to steal food to survive on the streets of Gotham. What makes these superheroes super is their determination to not be defined by helplessness. They embrace their origins, their flaws, and their mistakes and strive every day to become the best versions of themselves.
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A wonderful book filled with empathy and humanity.
- By Vincent on 10-06-15
By: Emily Gordon
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Molly Roden Winter was a mother of small children with a husband, Stewart, who often worked late. One night when Stewart missed the kids’ bedtime—again—she stormed out of the house to clear her head. At a bar, she met Matt, a flirtatious younger man. When Molly told her husband that Matt had asked her out, she was surprised that Stewart encouraged her to accept.
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engaging but contradictory
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Finally, a book about open marriage that grapples with the problems surrounding monogamy and fidelity in an honest, heartfelt, and non-fringe manner. Jenny Block is your average girl next door, a suburban wife and mother for whom married life never felt quite right. While many books on this topic presuppose that the listener is ready to embrace an "alternative lifestyle", Block operates from the assumption that most couples who are curious about or engaged in open marriages are in fact more like her - normal people who question whether monogamy is right for them.
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"Open" inspires a new look at marriage
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A must have resource
- By Marty B on 11-17-22
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Insatiable Wives
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Long before the term cuckold was a common word thrown around in the media, Dr. Ley explored the history and science of cuckolding. This groundbreaking work explores why and how some men not only allow, but encourage, their wives to pursue sexual relationships with other men.
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Communication about adventure vs security
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Open All the Way
- Confessions from My Open Marriage
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- Narrated by: Sadie Smythe
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
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Open All the Way marks Sadie Smythe's foray into long-range storytelling. Most well known for her outspoken commentary on her blog, about relationship paradigms and the navigation through her own alternative arrangement with her husband Scott, Sadie is very excited to offer her loyal readers a larger-lensed view into her openly married life. Each chapter of Open All the Way is an individual story in itself. But the combined ensemble compellingly chronicles her journey.
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Don't bother with the audio version, annoying!
- By C. O'Keefe on 11-13-16
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Raised in figure skating, Ashleigh brought the quest for perfectionism into marriage and motherhood, striving for the highest level of difficulty while trying to make it all appear effortless and beautiful. Hilarious, heartbreaking, and hopeful, what will she do when she realizes she has taken "doing it all" to a level she never intended?
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Not What I Was Expecting ‘aka never judge a book by its cover’
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By: Ashleigh Renard
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More: A Memoir of Open Marriage
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Molly Roden Winter was a mother of small children with a husband, Stewart, who often worked late. One night when Stewart missed the kids’ bedtime—again—she stormed out of the house to clear her head. At a bar, she met Matt, a flirtatious younger man. When Molly told her husband that Matt had asked her out, she was surprised that Stewart encouraged her to accept.
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engaging but contradictory
- By Eyal Goldshmid on 03-15-24
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"Open" inspires a new look at marriage
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A full one-fifth of the United States has engaged in consensual non-monogamy (CNM) at some point in their lives, and 29 percent of adults under 30 today consider open relationships to be morally acceptable—yet there are few resources to turn to when it comes to navigating this more non-traditional and explorative territory.
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A must have resource
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Long before the term cuckold was a common word thrown around in the media, Dr. Ley explored the history and science of cuckolding. This groundbreaking work explores why and how some men not only allow, but encourage, their wives to pursue sexual relationships with other men.
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Communication about adventure vs security
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By: David J. Ley
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Open All the Way
- Confessions from My Open Marriage
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Don't bother with the audio version, annoying!
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Worth a read
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The Anxious Person’s Guide to Non-Monogamy
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Embarking on a non-monogamous relationship can be a daunting experience, opening old wounds that cause anxiety, fear and confusion, something Lola Phoenix knows about all too well. In this all-you-need-to-know guide to exploring non-monogamy, polyamory and open relationships, Lola draws upon their years of experience in giving advice and being non-monogamous to provide guidance for every stage of your journey, helping you to prioritise your mental health and well being along the way.
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good poly book
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A fixation on porn and orgasm, strings of failed relationships and serial hook-ups with strangers, inevitable blackouts to blunt the shame - these are not things we often hear women share publicly, and not with the candor, eloquence and introspection Erica Garza brings to Getting Off. Garza draws an evocative, studied portrait of the anxiety that fuels her obsessions as well as the exhilaration and hope she begins to feel when she suspects she might be free of them. And yet there is no false or prepackaged sense of redemption here.
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If you suffer from PMO addiction, it's not for you
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Swingers
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Kim’s sexuality is one thing she’s had control over in her life. And she’ll be damned if any husband forces her to make herself small. Still, it’s Dallas, Texas, and Kim keeps her open marriage as secret as possible. There are seven suspects. Her life changes in a moment when Billy turns up dead in the pool later that night. Six guests, plus Kim, are the only people who were in the house, and Detective Troy Underwood already has his sights set on Kim as the killer.
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Twisty crime story.
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The Ethical Slut
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For anyone who has ever dreamed of love, sex, and companionship beyond the limits of traditional monogamy, this groundbreaking guide navigates the infinite possibilities that open relationships can offer. Experienced ethical sluts Dossie Easton and Janet W. Hardy dispel myths and cover all the skills necessary to maintain a successful and responsible polyamorous lifestyle.
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The information and advice is 100% totally solid!
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Open Monogamy
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Open Monogamy is Dr. Nelson's guidebook for couples who wish to explore new directions in their relationships - to bring in excitement, variety, and fresh experiences without sacrificing trust, security, and respect. In this practical, skill-based book, she helps you find your place on the "monogamy continuum"; have honest conversations about attraction and desire; remove shame and suspicion from an open relationship; and create agreements - traditional or otherwise - that are fulfilling, exhilarating, and built for enduring love.
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People, listen: THIS is the book you need
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Polywise
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As polyamory continues to make its way into the mainstream, more and more people are exploring consensual nonmonogamy in the hope of experiencing more love, connection, sex, freedom and support. While for many, the move expands personal horizons, for others, the transition can be challenging, leaving them blindsided and overwhelmed. Beyond the initial transition to nonmonogamy, many struggle with the root issues beneath the symptoms of broken agreements, communication challenges, increased fighting and persistent jealousy.
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The book is a gift, performance is not
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By: Jessica Fern, and others
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Sex at Dawn
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Since Darwin's day, we've been told that sexual monogamy comes naturally to our species. Mainstream science - as well as religious and cultural institutions - has maintained that men and women evolved in families in which a man's possessions and protection were exchanged for a woman's fertility and fidelity. But this narrative is collapsing....
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Strawmen and Ad Hominems
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Nonmonogamy and Neurodiversity
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Too often, the neurodivergent community is marginalized, de-sexualized or patronized. Neurodivergent people are often not seen as part of the romantic or sexual landscape, let alone as people who can have multiple partners. However, the fact that neurodivergent people do not see the world or operate within it as other people do can make nonmonogamy both uniquely challenging and uniquely well-suited to them. This book is for neurodivergent people considering or practicing nonmonogamy.
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Helpful
- By Lori on 10-30-24
By: Alyssa Gonzalez
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The Polyamory Toolkit
- A Guidebook for Polyamorous Relationships
- By: Dan Williams, Dawn Williams
- Narrated by: Dan Williams, Dawn Williams
- Length: 5 hrs and 33 mins
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For nearly two decades, Dan and Dawn have navigated their journey in polyamory by being proactive, insightful and analytical. Early on, there was very little information or resources available, so the adventure required them to learn from their mistakes as well as their successes.
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Unexpected and Very Useful
- By Phoenician on 10-14-24
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Whore of New York
- A Confession
- By: Liara Roux
- Narrated by: Liara Roux
- Length: 5 hrs and 50 mins
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Liara Roux is accustomed to being mislabeled and misunderstood. As a child, Liara’s inquisitive, instinctive, and rebellious nature was frequently problematized, in a world designed around the requirements of their neurotypical, cis, heterosexual male colleagues. Coming of age in an oppressively restrictive home, they shuffled tarot and explored self portraiture to rationalize the injustice of chronic pain, toxic lovers, and the cruel silence of divinity.
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Great story
- By Anonymous User on 05-22-24
By: Liara Roux
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Refusing Compulsory Sexuality
- A Black Asexual Lens on Our Sex-Obsessed Culture
- By: Sherronda J. Brown, Hess Love - foreword, Grace B Freedom - afterword
- Narrated by: Yu-Li Alice Shen
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The notion that everyone wants sex—and that we all have to have it—is false. It’s intertwined with our ideas about capitalism, race, gender, and queerness. And it impacts the most marginalized among us. For asexual folks, it means that ace and A-spec identity is often defined by a queerness that’s not queer enough, seen through a lens of perceived lack: lack of pleasure, connection, joy, maturity, and even humanity. In this exploration of what it means to be Black and asexual in America today, Sherronda J. Brown offers new perspectives on asexuality.
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Important and Insightful
- By E on 06-21-23
By: Sherronda J. Brown, and others
What listeners say about Open
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Cedric
- 02-08-22
Captivating!
It was like a scary roller-coaster ride. A fantastic insight into an alternative lifestyle.
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- Michelle M
- 03-16-22
Whew
Well, that was intense. But worth it. It reminded me so much of previous toxic relationships I've been in that my own trauma was triggered multiple times. (I'm made thankful that I only stayed for a few months, not years...) But I'm glad I pushed through to the finish and the healing process. Very relatable, well written, and inspiring!
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- Tiffany Dominick
- 04-09-22
Really relatable
I really like how honest this came across and loved the moments that as someone in the life style there were parts were I'm like "That was totally my exp too!" reg little things that are talked about that are details that only someone that has been in the life style would be familiar with and it really brings home this is someones account it's not just fiction. Totally worth the read
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- Josiah M. Gillespie
- 02-11-22
Starts like a Poly 50 Shades, but finished so strong. I would recommend
I really had a hard time with the first… maybe half of the book. Reminding myself this is a memoir and not a “how to” helped center the story better. The book starts out like the poly version of 50 Shades of Grey and I just wanted to shake her out of the train wreck I was observing. This says something, the author lived this experience and she rose from it. I can really appreciate that non-monogamy is a difficult journey for many, for some of the same reasons monogamy is hard. Any relationship can be hard and so many of us could use better communication, self awareness and therapy. Not all relationships are good or healthy and it starts with us doing our own work.
The author really bared herself out there for us. Her candor and authenticity are shocking at times, relatable, frustrating, and in the end therapeutic because she is not alone.
Great Job Rachel, and glad for your story to be out there.
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- Kindle Customer
- 02-19-22
Just So Good
She spoke so many of my thoughts and feelings, made the crazy I've felt and experienced seem so much less mine or mine alone which was a beautiful experience. I have kept so much internalized that she powerfully, vulnerably, and knowledgeably shared...truly allowing her painful experiences to heal herself and others through this book. I couldn't stop listening and thank the universe for sending me this book when I needed it, and thank Rachel for writing it!
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- Eleanor Boothroyd
- 02-04-24
Tragic love story meets polyamory dissertation
This book intrigued me. I enjoyed hearing it all in the author’s own voice and her footnotes throughout were incredibly well researched and taught me a lot about polyamory, relationship anarchy, swingers, as well as racism and feminism. The plentiful sex scenes (full of pornographic details) ranged from fascinating to shocking to distressing. But ultimately the polyamory is just a context: it is at its core a tragic love story of one woman’s downward spiral in (and reemergence from) a bad relationship.
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- Amber Desmond
- 05-12-24
Moved to tears countless times
I’m in a particular phase of my life right now where I don’t know if the traditional mold of relationships fits with my personality anymore.
I’ve been in a long term monogamous ( not married, but we live together) relationship for 11yrs.
I however am 44 and not starting off as this author did, in her 20’s, but I don’t know what would be best suited for my partner and I.
This book was incredibly informative, inspiring, interesting, and my heart broke with her on her journey of discovery and growth during her relationship with “ Adam”. I have not been in officially open relationships, but I have ABSOLUTELY been Gaslighted before & as it was unfolding on the page my heart squeezed in anxiety and anger.
I identified tremendous with Rachel ( especially the younger me in my 20’s and exploring relationships)
This book managed to be be filled with so much information in regards to ALL the different types of ways of being in relationships these days, as well as so much inclusivity in queer and all related subjects ways of being in relationship ( if there was something to note that was different)
Also factoring race and culture in , this book was very politically correct and sensitive, without feeling righteous or preachy.
It felt raw, authentic, it felt like a woman sharing her story, her feelings, even when they might not be deemed socially acceptable by the general standard of normative ways of being.
But I devoured it and I am beyond grateful for this author and her words and honesty.
I would absolutely recommend reading this.
It’s at once a beautiful story of a young woman growing and learning, discovering who she is and what she’s really made of, a love story, and sexual exploration journey, and also a wealth of information about a ton of topics that are truly fascinating to learn about.
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- Anonymous User
- 11-30-22
An honest, well written contemporaneous journal of one person’s experience testing open relationships.
I think what I found most interesting about this book is that it vulnerably explores the pains and the pleasures of an open relationship. That it’s from a woman’s perspective and based on real time journal entries with after-the-fact research offered in support of many of the ideas and experiences ultimately makes for a well written, engaging read or listen.
If you are at all interested in the topic of open relationships, this book should be on your short list.
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- Stephen D. Sloan
- 02-22-22
Kudos!
Krantz is a wicked smart person. Wow, what a powerful book. I finished it a couple of days ago. I am still digesting it. I believe people should be able to love and have sex how they authentically love and have sex, without being shamed, as long as it's done with consent. Krantz had a long-term relationship that involved abusive behavior. This is not a mark against consensual non-monogamy (CNM). Plenty of monogamous relationships also involve abusive behavior.
I like that Krantz included enough footnotes to substantiate that many of her points were not just opinions she conjured up. I listened to the Audible version. I may need to buy a hard copy to follow up on her references. Yes, it's that good.
I liked how Krantz breaks the fourth wall and writes directly to her future readers at times. It's like she's writing a letter to a friend. This really personalizes and makes more intimate the connection between Krantz and her readers.
Krantz joins Gracie X and Sophie Lucido Johnson and other amazing talented women who have written books about CNM relationships. We need more books on this subject. These books are stories that expand the imagination of the possible and encourage people to live more authentic lives without shame. We definitely need that.
Kudos Rachel Krantz, kudos!
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- Elizabeth Beck
- 02-04-22
Realistic and informative
I love being able to hear about an authentic polyam experience. So often we feel the need to be represented, that we do so at the cost of being real. Real people in relationships aren’t always the best. Thank you for sharing your true experience. This is art.
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