When Narcissism Comes to Church
Healing Your Community from Emotional and Spiritual Abuse
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Narrated by:
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Jim Denison
About this listen
Why does narcissism seem to thrive in our churches?
We've seen the news stories and heard the rumors. Maybe we ourselves have been hurt by a narcissistic church leader. It's easy to throw the term around and diagnose others from afar. But what is narcissism, really? And how does it infiltrate the church?
Chuck DeGroat has been counseling pastors with Narcissistic Personality Disorder, as well as those wounded by narcissistic leaders and systems, for over 20 years. He knows firsthand the devastation narcissism leaves in its wake and how insidious and painful it is. In When Narcissism Comes to Church, DeGroat takes a close look at narcissism, not only in ministry leaders but also in church systems. He offers compassion and hope for those affected by its destructive power and imparts wise counsel for churches looking to heal from its systemic effects.
DeGroat also offers hope for narcissists themselves - not by any shortcut, but by the long, slow road of genuine recovery, possible only through repentance and trust in the humble gospel of Jesus.
©2020 Charles R. DeGroat (P)2020 eChristianListeners also enjoyed...
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When you really care about someone, it’s easy to get stuck in painful, even destructive patterns - caving in to a spouse’s manipulation, ignoring a live-at-home son’s irresponsibility, not confronting a friend’s addiction. We excuse people again and again, and then kick ourselves for not setting better boundaries. But this important audiobook, with its transformational tools from leading Christian counselor Tim Clinton and noted author Pat Springle, will guide you in not only breaking through to better relationships but making big changes for the better.
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The Enneagram
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- By: Richard Rohr, Andreas Ebert
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This runaway best seller shows both the basic logic of the Enneagram and its harmony with the core truths of Christian thought from the time of the early Church forward. Experience author Richard Rohr's expertise and advanced thought on the subject, easily laid out for all audiences.
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Not truly a Christian view
- By Ben on 07-27-21
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How to Be an Adult in Relationships
- The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
- By: David Richo
- Narrated by: David Richo
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
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"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this audiobook, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships - one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life.
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Missing text
- By Annah Nimouse on 07-26-19
By: David Richo
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The Emotionally Destructive Relationship
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Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools.
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Thank you
- By Anonymous User on 08-27-24
By: Leslie Vernick
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Living an Examined Life
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- Narrated by: Kevin M. Connolly
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How do you define “growing up?” Does it mean you achieve certain cultural benchmarks - a steady income, paying taxes, marriage, and children? Or does it mean leaving behind the expectations of others and growing into the person you were meant to be? Here acclaimed author James Hollis guides you through 21 areas for self-inquiry and growth - such as how to exorcise the ghosts of your past, when to choose meaning over happiness, how to construct a mature spirituality, and how to seize permission to be who you really are.
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Extraordinary compilation of Dr. Hollis' works
- By Joseph on 02-17-18
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Men's Work
- A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom
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In Men’s Work, ManTalks founder Connor Beaton offers the tactical, self-led guide men have been looking for. Here, he destigmatizes inner work by reframing it as a kind of psychological warrior training that many men can relate to and have been craving. Beaton walks you through a framework for facing the hidden and rejected aspects of yourself—factors that lead to self-sabotage, anxiety, and depression.
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From a woman’s perspective
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Changes That Heal
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Many of us struggle with anxiety, loneliness, and feelings of inadequacy. We know that God created us in his image, but how can we be loving when we feel burned out? How can we be free when we struggle with addiction? Will we ever enjoy the complete healing God promises? Combining his professional expertise and personal experience, renowned psychologist Dr. Henry Cloud guides us through four basic ways to become joy-filled, mature followers of Christ.
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Terrible production, excellent book
- By R. Carlson on 10-05-08
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You and your ego: how to develop a healthy sense of self without becoming an egotist - and how to see through that sense of self for the happiness of yourself and others. How can you build the healthy ego necessary to be effective in life - yet avoid the kind of egotism that makes people dislike you? Don't worry; Dave Richo has the answers. His new book shows you how to navigate the tricky waters between egotism and selflessness in a way that avoids both extremes and makes you much more effective and loving.
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Extraordinarily Revealing
- By Steve D. on 12-16-21
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Befriend
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Is real friendship too risky? We live in a world where real friendship is hard to find. Suspicious of others and insecure about ourselves, we retreat into the safety of our small, self-made digital worlds. Tragically, even the church can become a place that reinforces this isolation. Jesus models a much richer vision of friendship. Scott Sauls, pastor and teacher, invites you to see the breadth of Christ's love in this audiobook, Befriend.
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Great post election therapy.
- By Manoli on 12-20-16
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Untangling Emotions
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Our emotions are complex. Some of us seem able to ignore our feelings, while others feel controlled by them. But most of us would admit that we don’t always know what to do with how we feel. The Bible teaches us that our emotions are an indispensable part of what makes us human―and play a crucial role in our relationships with God and others. Exploring how God designed emotions for our good, this book shows us how to properly engage with our emotions.
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So good
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No Perfect People Allowed
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How do we live out the message of Jesus in today’s ever-changing culture? The church is facing its greatest challenge - and its greatest opportunity - in our postmodern, post-Christian world. God is drawing thousands of spiritually curious “imperfect people” to become his church - but how are we doing at welcoming them? No Perfect People Allowed shows you how to deconstruct the five main barriers standing between emerging generations and your church by creating the right culture.
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No Perfect People Allowed
- By Robin on 04-19-09
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What listeners say about When Narcissism Comes to Church
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Lisa Taedter
- 04-26-23
Great information
So many levels to NPD; it truly is relatable to every person that you come in contact with.
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- Michelle Archer
- 03-12-22
Great Book
Enjoyed the content and the narrator. Great read of toxic behavior and culture within the church. How to spot it, how to heal, how to see it in yourself. Great resource.
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- Jennifer Dixon
- 03-04-22
Becareful if you're a victim of abuse
I struggled at points with this book. I do believe people can change with God's help. I would caution a person who is in an abusive situation, not to think that they are in the appropriate position to help their narcissist. Otherwise, I appreciate the hope that Chuck has and his compassion for a discarded group of people.
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- Lady Day
- 03-10-23
Believer Must Read
Must read for all who 'say' they are followers of Jesus Christ. I challenge us all to read with a the thought of possibly seeing ourselves. If we each do this, The Church would begin to heal and get back to where it is supposed to be
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- cathy1509
- 11-20-21
Confirmation & Explanation Of Everything I Was F
Excellent listen! Not like any other book ok I’ve read.
Educated in not only secular psychology (BS)have also finished 2 post graduate, 2 year studies at The AACC( American Assoc of Christian Counselors), titled, “Caring for people God’s Way”, & “Extraordinary Women”, I believe this book is an must read for all Christians. Jesus picked Luke as a disciple, I believe to let us know that medicine & science are things God works thru. If you go to the Doctor then you shouldn’t be against “ psychology as it is a social science. This will open many people eyes as to why they felt hurt by church & Pastors.
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- Ray
- 03-06-23
Mmhmm
I found myself understanding and agreeing with much of what was said after having been in two previous churches with narcissistic leaders. Such a shame they’re allowed to continue their ways. The book was very enlightening and worth the time.
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- Andrea D. Lawson
- 03-08-23
Very eye opening.
After having experienced this myself, listening to this book was one revelation after the other. There were so many red flags I ignored. I'm going to be more aware the next time a narcissist comes to church.
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- 💟🌧uhm🌧💟
- 01-29-24
The etiology of a narcissist system
This is an excellent book. I learned so much about narcissism and that this looks like in a church structure.
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- Lolo
- 12-03-22
Great read
This was a great read from a psychological and theological perspective.
I Highly recommend adding it to your reading list.
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- EddyB
- 01-25-23
Very good and informative book
Overall I enjoyed listening to this book. It is both thorough and holistic in its approach to narcissism. The author does his due diligence to not only characterize this issue, both as a cautionary tale and tool for hope. He also provides advice to not only victims but systems/churches and even perpetrator/narcissists themselves (since we are not merely our symptoms), all while referencing the gospel. My only negative criticism is his use of the enneagram and giving it its own dedicated chapter. It’s a highly debated tool with questionable at best origins. But other than that the other chapters are solid. Highly recommended with that one caveat
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