
The Gaslight Effect
How to Spot and Survive the Hidden Manipulation Others Use to Control Your Life
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Narrated by:
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Nan McNamara
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By:
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Dr. Robin Stern
About this listen
Are You Being Gaslighted?
Check for these telltale signs:
- You constantly second-guess yourself.
- You wonder, "Am I being too sensitive?" a dozen times a day.
- You wonder frequently if you are a "good enough" girlfriend/wife/employee/friend/daughter.
- You have trouble making simple decisions.
- You think twice before bringing up innocent topics of conversation.
- You frequently make excuses for your partner's behavior to friends and family.
- Before your partner comes home from work, you run through a checklist in your head to anticipate anything you might have done wrong that day.
- You buy clothes for yourself, furnishings for your apartment, or other personal purchases thinking about what your partner would like instead of what would make you feel great.
- You actually start to enjoy the constant criticism, because you think, "What doesn't kill me will make me stronger."
- You start speaking to your husband through his secretary so you don't have to tell him things you're afraid might upset him.
- You start lying to avoid the put-downs and reality twists.
- You feel as though you can't do anything right.
- You frequently wonder if you're good enough for your lover.
- Your kids start trying to protect you from being humiliated by your partner.
- You feel hopeless and joyless.
Your husband crosses the line in his flirtations with another woman at a dinner party. When you confront him, he asks you to stop being insecure and controlling. After a long argument, you apologize for giving him a hard time.
Your boss backed you on a project when you met privately in his office, and you went full steam ahead. But at a large gathering of staff - including yours - he suddenly changes his tune and publicly criticizes your poor judgment. When you tell him your concerns for how this will affect your authority, he tells you that the project was ill-conceived and you'll have to be more careful in the future. You begin to question your competence.
Your mother belittles your clothes, your job, your friends, and your boyfriend. But instead of fighting back as your friends encourage you to do, you tell them that your mother is often right and that a mature person should be able to take a little criticism.
If you think things like this can't happen to you, think again. Gaslighting is when someone wants you to do what you know you shouldn’t and to believe the unbelieveable. It can happen to you and it probably already has.
How do we know? If you consider answering “yes” to even one of the following questions, you’ve probably been gaslighted:
Does your opinion of yourself change according to approval or disapproval from your spouse?
When your boss praises you, do you feel as if you could conquer the world?
Do you dread having small things go wrong at home — buying the wrong brand of toothpaste, not having dinner ready on time, a mistaken appointment written on the calendar?
Gaslighting is an insidious form of emotional abuse and manipulation that is difficult to recognize and even harder to break free from. That’s because it plays into one of our worst fears — of being abandoned — and many of our deepest needs: to be understood, appreciated, and loved. In this groundbreaking guide, the prominent therapist Dr. Robin Stern shows how the Gaslight Effect works and tells you how to turn up your Gaslight Radar, so you know when a relationship is headed for trouble.
Includes a bonus PDF of appendices from the book.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2007 Dr. Robin Stern (P)2018 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
The psychopath carefully selects the most indifferent and heartbreaking way imaginable to abandon you. They destroy you as a way to reassure themselves. Psychopath Free will help you out of the darkness so that you can begin making better choices that will forever alter the course of your life. So say farewell to love triangles, cryptic letters, self-doubt, and manufactured anxiety. You are no longer a pawn in the mind games of a psychopath. You are free.
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Be kind to yourself and read this book.
- By GoodMonster on 09-19-15
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Boundaries After a Pathological Relationship
- By: Adelyn Birch
- Narrated by: Kitty Hendrix
- Length: 1 hr and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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If you were involved in a pathological relationship - or you want to prevent it from happening in the first place - this book is for you. It gets to the heart of the matter of personal boundaries. Identifying and setting clear boundaries is vital for survivors and for anyone who wants to become more confident, improve relationships, and prevent victimization. When you create boundaries you take a stand for yourself and your life, and you communicate your worth to others in a real and practical way. This concise and powerful book is filled with practical wisdom and useful tips.
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short but great information
- By Renita S. Creasy on 06-01-18
By: Adelyn Birch
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Healing from Toxic Relationships
- 10 Essential Steps to Recover from Gaslighting, Narcissism, and Emotional Abuse
- By: Stephanie Moulton Sarkis PhD
- Narrated by: Suehyla El-Attar, Stephanie Moulton Sarkis PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Surviving and escaping a toxic or abusive relationship can often only be part of the struggle. Long after, survivors often struggle to heal; your self‑esteem may be damaged, you may feel rage and betrayal, and you may punish and/or blame yourself. The author of Gaslighting and specialist in toxic behavior, narcissistic abuse, and personality disorders, Dr. Stephanie Sarkis has seen it all—and she is here to help you understand how to move forward.
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Made sense
- By Amanda on 10-07-23
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Coercive Control
- How Men Entrap Women in Personal Life
- By: Evan Stark
- Narrated by: William Sarris
- Length: 21 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Evan Stark, founder of one of America's first battered women's shelters, shows how "domestic violence" is neither primarily domestic nor necessarily violent, but a pattern of controlling behaviors more akin to terrorism and hostage-taking. Drawing on court records, interviews, and FBI statistics, Stark details coercive strategies that men use to deny women their very personhood, from "beeper games" to food logs to micromanaging dress, speech, sexual activity, and work.
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Wow
- By Emily Meyers on 03-22-21
By: Evan Stark
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Dark Psychology and Gaslighting Manipulation
- The Shadow Side of Influence: A Guide to Dark Psychology and Gaslighting Tactics and How to Recognize and Defend Yourself from Manipulative Behavior
- By: Joshua Roundtree
- Narrated by: Deedee Ash
- Length: 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you tired of feeling manipulated and controlled by others? Do you want to understand the dark psychological tactics used by manipulators and how to protect yourself from their influence? If so, this audiobook is for you.
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Repetitive and as waste of money.
- By Anonymous User on 04-14-23
By: Joshua Roundtree
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When Love Is a Lie
- Narcissistic Partners & the Pathological Relationship Agenda
- By: Zari L Ballard
- Narrated by: Lisa Bunting
- Length: 4 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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When our partner is a narcissist, only those who've actually experienced the madness will ever understand what we're going through. When Love Is a Lie is a straight-up, tell-all book about narcissism in relationships that skips the clinical bullshit to focus solely on the personal experience. A narrative that holds nothing back, Zari Ballard's story will educate, enlighten, and empower you to evaluate (and fully understand) the mind-boggling dysfunction in your own relationship.
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Greatfull to have found this!
- By Joy on 03-13-17
By: Zari L Ballard
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What a Narcissist Does at the End of a Relationship
- Dealing with and Understanding the Aftermath of a Narcissistic Relationship
- By: Lauren Kozlowski
- Narrated by: Stephanie Murphy
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Breaking up in normal circumstances is hard enough. If you throw a narcissist into the equation, it makes it all the more difficult. If you're looking to listen to this audiobook, you're likely heartbroken and looking for some guidance, support, or understanding. As someone who has been through the hell of a narcissistic relationship, I can offer you all three, and I hope this audiobook can help you make sense of this heartbreaking time.
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Horrible! Read if you want to become a narcissist!
- By DJ on 01-21-21
By: Lauren Kozlowski
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87 Tips and Tricks for Women with ADHD
- Survive the Chaos of Living with Adult ADHD, Manage Your Symptoms, and Live Your Best Life
- By: Kristen Thrasher
- Narrated by: Cara Firestone
- Length: 1 hr and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (Also known as ADHD) presents itself in three main symptoms: inattention and hyperactivity or impulsivity. Hyperactivity and impulsivity are closely related and oftentimes coexist with inattention. Women and girls with ADHD most often go undiagnosed for several reasons. This is due in part because women tend do have less obvious or less misbehaved characteristics than men do.
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horrible narration
- By Keri on 12-10-21
By: Kristen Thrasher
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Healing from Hidden Abuse
- A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse
- By: Shannon Thomas LCSW
- Narrated by: Wendy Tremont King
- Length: 6 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Within every community, toxic people can be found hiding in families, couples, companies, and places of worship. The cryptic nature of psychological abuse involves repetitious mind games played by one individual or a group of people. Psychological abuse leaves no bruises. There are no broken bones. There are no holes in the walls. The bruises, brokenness, and holes are held tightly within the target of the abuse.
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Proceed with caution
- By Kamel on 10-17-18
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Slay the Bully
- How to Negotiate with a Narcissist and Win
- By: Rebecca Zung Esq.
- Narrated by: Rebecca Zung Esq.
- Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Slay narcissists—the ultimate bullies—in negotiations by following this simple formula—developed by one of the top 1 percent of attorneys in the nation—a proven method to take you from victim to victory, without backlash!
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Finally. A strategy for WINNING.
- By Anonymous on 12-17-23
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F*ck No!
- How to Stop Saying Yes When You Can't, You Shouldn't, or You Just Don't Want To
- By: Sarah Knight
- Narrated by: Sarah Knight
- Length: 5 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Are you burnt out from taking on more than you can handle or accepting less than you deserve? Tired of giving in instead of sticking up for yourself? Sick of saying yes all the time? You're gonna love F*CK NO! No is an acceptable answer, and it's time to start using it. Whether you're a People-Pleaser, Overachiever, Pushover, or have serious FOMO, bestselling "anti-guru" Sarah Knight helps you say what you really mean without being really mean—or burning out for fear of missing out.
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End of the line
- By ili pika on 02-10-20
By: Sarah Knight
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The Verbally Abusive Relationship, Expanded Third Edition
- By: Patricia Evans
- Narrated by: Annette Romano
- Length: 9 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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In this fully expanded and updated third edition of the best-selling classic, you learn why verbal abuse is more widespread than ever, and how you can deal with it. You'll get more of the answers you need to recognize abuse when it happens, respond to abusers safely and appropriately, and most important, lead a happier, healthier life. In two all-new chapters, Evans reveals the outside stresses driving the rise in verbal abuse - and shows you how you can mitigate the devastating effects on your relationships.
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Caution is needed
- By Anonymous User on 10-19-19
By: Patricia Evans
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Men Who Hate Women and the Women Who Love Them
- When Loving Hurts and You Don’t Know Why
- By: Dr. Susan Forward, Joan Torres
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Is this the way love is supposed to feel? Does the man you love assume the right to control how you live and behave? Have you given up important activities or people to keep him happy? Does he belittle your opinions, your feelings, or your accomplishments? Does he withdraw love, money, approval, or sex to punish you? If the questions here reveal a familiar pattern, you may be in love with a misogynist. In this superb self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward helps you understand your man's destructive pattern and the part you play in it.
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FANTASTIC!!
- By Lara Cockrell on 07-24-18
By: Dr. Susan Forward, and others
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The Covert Passive-Aggressive Narcissist
- Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse
- By: Debbie Mirza
- Narrated by: Debbie Mirza
- Length: 6 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Finding Healing After Hidden Emotional and Psychological Abuse is the most comprehensive and helpful audiobook on the topic of covert narcissism. This type of narcissism is one of the most damaging forms because the abuse is so hidden and so insidious. You can be in a relationship that can last for decades and not realize you are being psychologically and emotionally controlled, manipulated, and abused.
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This book CHANGED MY LIFE!
- By Mojo on 12-19-18
By: Debbie Mirza
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Why Does He Do That?
- Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Peter Berkrot
- Length: 13 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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He says he loves you. So...why does he do that? You've asked yourself this question again and again. Now you have the chance to see inside the minds of angry and controlling men---and to change your life. In this groundbreaking book, a counselor who specializes in working with abusive men shows you how to improve, survive, or leave an abusive relationship.
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I needed this.
- By james p weiss on 09-07-17
By: Lundy Bancroft
THE ORIGINAL: STILL A GREAT PLACE TO START
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Life changing
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Gender examples need updating
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Excellent book audio
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Easy to understand. Easy to listen.
Keep your eyes open!
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Amazing!
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Educational
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excellent!
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Thank you Thank you
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Critical information for all
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good read
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