Preview
  • Growing Up as the Scapegoat to Narcissistic Parents

  • A Guide to Healing
  • By: Jay Reid
  • Narrated by: Todd Lewandowski
  • Length: 8 hrs and 15 mins
  • 4.8 out of 5 stars (39 ratings)

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Growing Up as the Scapegoat to Narcissistic Parents

By: Jay Reid
Narrated by: Todd Lewandowski
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Publisher's summary

This book is for those who suffered as the scapegoat child to a narcissistic parent. The scapegoat child is emotionally deprived, devalued and trapped by the parent. The child comes to believe they are defective and undeserving. These beliefs can plague the individual into adulthood.

Scapegoating reflects the narcissistic parent’s own emotional disturbance–not the child’s.

Healing is possible for scapegoat survivors! New healthy beliefs about oneself can be established. This book explains how to heal with the three pillars of recovery:

  1. Making sense of the narcissistic abuse so you know it was not your fault
  2. Creating distance from narcissistic abusers in your life today
  3. Living in defiance of the narcissist's rules

Listeners will learn to apply these pillars in their own lives and reclaim the quality of life they deserve.

©2023 Jay Reid (P)2023 Jay Reid

What listeners say about Growing Up as the Scapegoat to Narcissistic Parents

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Great book

This was a great book. It was quite validating. Must read if you have a toxic family.

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Wow! Clarity on So Many Levels!

This is the best book I’ve come across that explains what it’s like to grow up as the scapegoat in a toxic family. I’ve listened to it 3 times; gleaning more validation each listen. Bought the paperback too with plans to highlight certain nuggets of wisdom.

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So good

I will be listening to this again as it's full of great information! I'm so glad I found this book.

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    3 out of 5 stars

Sounds like AI

I can’t get past the narration sounding like AI. I doubt I’ll be able to finish it. Probably a great book

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This is my story!

I have never heard my story, and the issues with the narcissists in my life. described so honestly. The Narratoration is flawless. Told brilliantly! Everything I've always thought and felt was described perfectly. I couldn't stop listening! As I just turned 60, I wish I would have had this book decades ago. Everything described in this book was my experience and it was awful being the scapegoat. I finally see that I'm not the bad person. My parents were awful people. Every example was either them or me. And at 60, I'm in therapy to try and undo the damage done to me. It's good to know It wasn't me, but I've got a long road ahead. If only they had been decent, I could have become something great. God only knows what I couldve become. Anything in life but the sorry scapegoat would have been amazing. Unfortunately I had sick violent Borderline/Narcissistic mother and FULL ON Narcissistic Father. And I hate them. They are truly evil. I'm glad the book shows who they really are.
Thank You!!

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intelligent practicality

nice combination of professional opinion and supportive data that is easily applied to self improvement.

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If you've ever felt like the family loser and don't know why

This is such a great book, its hard to express how this hits the mark on scapegoats, why they are chosen, why those not being scapegoated seem to jump on them and take the side of the abuser, why the abuser/abusers do what they do and why the scapegoat takes their survival skills into the world only to self sabotage, choose narc friends, stay in bad relationships, and have a lack of skills to be kind to themselves. It explains that and so much more.

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Helpful for Scapegoats to Understand Their Toxic Family’s Disorder/Dysfunction

I identify with the scapegoat role all too much. Jay Reid accurately illustrates what my parebts and siblings did to me for decades and the toxic narcissistic traits that compelled them to carry out the abuse. He shares useful insight for the scapegoat whose awareness has led to cutting contact from the narcissistic family in order to heal. I no longer feel so alone in the darkness and am working on self-compassion every day with the support of experts like Jay Reid.

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The story of the G.O.A.T.

I learned much inside this book of what I already knew without being able to articulate. Thank you Jay Reid. Love you guys, We are worthy.

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The information is invaluable!

The wealth of information is the best part about this book! This is the only book I have seen on the subject. If only I had it while growing up as a scapegoat! The performance of the narrator was good but lacking a bit between paragraphs. He rushed words together without giving people a chance to absorb the ending. The quality of the author's writing is adequate but also lacking. It seems as though no one edited this book.

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