
I Never Thought of It That Way
How to Have Fearlessly Curious Conversations in Dangerously Divided Times
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Narrated by:
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Mónica Guzmán
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By:
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Mónica Guzmán
About this listen
We think we have the answers, but we need to be asking a lot more questions.
Journalist Mónica Guzmán is the loving liberal daughter of Mexican immigrants who voted - twice - for Donald Trump. When the country could no longer see straight across the political divide, Mónica set out to find what was blinding us and discovered the most eye-opening tool we’re not using: our own built-in curiosity.
Partisanship is up, trust is down, and our social media feeds make us sure we’re right and everyone else is ignorant (or worse). But avoiding one another is hurting our relationships and our society.
In this timely, personal guide, Mónica, the chief storyteller for the national cross-partisan depolarization organization Braver Angels, takes you to the real front lines of a crisis that threatens to grind America to a halt - broken conversations among confounded people. She shows you how to overcome the fear and certainty that surround us to finally do what only seems impossible: understand and even learn from people in your life whose whole worldview is different from or even opposed to yours.
Drawing from cross-partisan conversations she’s had, organized, or witnessed everywhere from the echo chambers on social media to the wheat fields in Oregon to raw, unfiltered fights with her own family on election night, Mónica shows how you can put your natural sense of wonder to work for you immediately, finding the answers you need by talking with people - rather than about them - and asking the questions you want, curiously.
Here, you’ll learn:
- How to ask what you really want to know (even if you’re afraid to)
- How to grow smarter from even the most tense interactions, online or off
- How to cross boundaries and find common ground - with anyone
Whether you’re left, right, center, or not a fan of labels: If you’re ready to fight back against the confusion, heartbreak, and madness of our dangerously divided times - in your own life, at least - Mónica’s got the tools and fresh, surprising insights to prove that seeing where people are coming from isn’t just possible. It’s easier than you think.
©2022 Mónica Guzmán (P)2022 BenBella BooksListeners also enjoyed...
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From the richest Romans to the robber barons to today's bankers and tech billionaires, Sam Wilkin offers Freakonomics-esque insights into what it really takes to make a fortune. These stories of larger-than-life characters, strategies, and sacrifices reveal how the wealthiest did it, usually by a passion for finding loopholes, working around bureaucratic systems, and creating obstacles to competitors.
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This is not a manual to getting "Obscenely Rich!"
- By Franck W. on 10-10-15
By: Sam Wilkin
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The Right Call
- What Sports Teach Us About Leadership, Excellence, and Decision-Making
- By: Sally Jenkins
- Narrated by: Sally Jenkins
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Sportswriter Sally Jenkins has spent her entire adult life observing and writing about great coaches and athletes. With her engaging and expert prose, she has helped shape the way we view these talented sports icons. But somewhere along the line, she realized, they had begun to shape her. Now, she presents the astonishing inner qualities in these same people that pushed them to overcome pressure, elevate their performances, and discover champion identities.
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one of the best reads in sport science
- By Allaire on 04-14-24
By: Sally Jenkins
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How Minds Change
- The Surprising Science of Belief, Opinion, and Persuasion
- By: David McRaney
- Narrated by: David McRaney
- Length: 9 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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What made a prominent conspiracy-theorist YouTuber finally see that 9/11 was not a hoax? Can you finally have a productive conversation about politics with your uncle at the next family gathering? How does an ordinary person find the courage to leave a cult? Can widespread social change only take place when a generation dies out?
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Fascinating, nuanced, well-written, but…
- By Jason J. Gay on 08-13-22
By: David McRaney
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How to Have Impossible Conversations
- A Very Practical Guide
- By: Peter Boghossian, James Lindsay
- Narrated by: Peter Boghossian
- Length: 6 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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In How to Have Impossible Conversations, Peter Boghossian and James Lindsay guide you through the straightforward, practical, conversational techniques necessary for every successful conversation—whether the issue is climate change, religious faith, gender identity, race, poverty, immigration, or gun control. Boghossian and Lindsay teach the subtle art of instilling doubts and opening minds.
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Important Skills Spoiled By Author Opinions
- By Robin on 02-27-20
By: Peter Boghossian, and others
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Down Girl
- The Logic of Misogyny
- By: Kate Manne
- Narrated by: Lauren Fortgang
- Length: 10 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Misogyny is a hot topic, yet it's often misunderstood. What is misogyny, exactly? Who deserves to be called a misogynist? How does misogyny contrast with sexism, and why is it prone to persist - or increase - even when sexist gender roles are waning? This book is an exploration of misogyny in public life and politics by the moral philosopher Kate Manne. It argues that misogyny should not be understood primarily in terms of the hatred or hostility some men feel toward all or most women. Rather, it's primarily about controlling, policing, punishing, and exiling the "bad" women.
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Five Star Book w/bad Narration
- By Cherrybomb on 02-08-19
By: Kate Manne
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Attitude Is Everything
- Change Your Attitude... Change Your Life!
- By: Jeff Keller
- Narrated by: Michael F. Walworth
- Length: 3 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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This is a "success manual" that gives readers a step by step plan for taking control of their lives and unleashing their incredible potential. The book consists of 12 Lessons.
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How important this message is!
- By Roger Johnson on 03-20-25
By: Jeff Keller
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Playful Parenting
- By: Lawrence J. Cohen Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Lawrence J. Cohen Ph.D.
- Length: 6 hrs and 48 mins
- Abridged
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Playful Parenting means joining children in their world of play, focusing on connection and confidence, giggling and roughhousing, and following your child's lead. This audiobook is an exciting approach to raising children that will help you nurture close relationships and solve behavior problems.
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How to say "play with your kids" for 100 pages
- By Helpful Reviewer on 10-20-11
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Things My Son Needs to Know About the World
- By: Fredrik Backman
- Narrated by: Santino Fontana
- Length: 3 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Things My Son Needs to Know About the World collects the personal dispatches from the front lines of one of the most daunting experiences any man can experience: fatherhood. As he conveys his profound awe at experiencing all the “firsts” that fill him with wonder and catch him completely unprepared, Fredrik Backman doesn’t shy away from revealing his own false steps and fatherly flaws, tackling issues both great and small, from masculinity and midlife crises to practical jokes and poop.
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Not my favorite Frederick Backman book
- By Frog on 06-16-19
By: Fredrik Backman
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Divergent Mind
- Thriving in a World That Wasn’t Designed For You
- By: Jenara Nerenberg
- Narrated by: Tegan Ashton Cohan
- Length: 6 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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A paradigm-shifting study of neurodivergent women - those with ADHD, autism, synesthesia, high sensitivity, and sensory processing disorder - exploring why these traits are overlooked in women and how society benefits from allowing their unique strengths to flourish.
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Provided no insight
- By Somebody on 06-24-20
By: Jenara Nerenberg
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Permission to Feel
- Unlocking the Power of Emotions to Help Our Kids, Ourselves, and Our Society Thrive
- By: Marc Brackett Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Marc Brackett Ph.D.
- Length: 7 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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This program is read by the author.
Marc Brackett is a professor in Yale University’s Child Study Center and founding director of the Yale Center for Emotional Intelligence. In his 25 years as an “emotion scientist”, he has developed a remarkably effective plan to improve the lives of children and adults - a blueprint for understanding our emotions and using them wisely so that they help, rather than hinder, our success and well-being. The core of his approach is a legacy from his childhood, from an astute uncle who gave him permission to feel.
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Learn to Read
- By Stonerchick on 04-19-20
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You're Not Enough (and That's Okay)
- Escaping the Toxic Culture of Self-Love
- By: Allie Beth Stuckey
- Narrated by: Allie Beth Stuckey
- Length: 3 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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From one of the sharpest Christian voices of her generation and host of the podcast Relatable comes a framework for escaping our culture of trendy narcissism - and embracing God instead. We're told that the key to happiness is self-love. Instagram influencers, mommy bloggers, self-help gurus, and even Christian teachers promise that if we learn to love ourselves, we'll be successful, secure, and complete.
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I’m Not Christian
- By Danielle Hamlin on 09-10-20
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Best Self
- Be You, Only Better
- By: Mike Bayer
- Narrated by: Mike Bayer, Phil McGraw
- Length: 8 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Mike Bayer, known to the thousands of clients whose lives he has changed as Coach Mike, has helped everyone from pop stars to business executives to people just like you discover the freedom to be their best selves. By asking them and leading them to ask themselves a series of important but tough questions, he helps them see what their best selves and anti-selves really look like. Best Self is an accessible and interactive audiobook that distills all of Coach Mike’s wisdom into a compact, focused guide that will ignite anyone’s desire for change.
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There wasn’t any enhancement file with the audio boo!
- By Marci on 09-01-19
By: Mike Bayer
What listeners say about I Never Thought of It That Way
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- Frank Gaughen
- 04-27-22
Great read!
I really enjoyed the book. it definitely helped me think about things differently. Great discussion and thoughts. i loved the exampkes and can defintiely see myself rereading. Great stuff
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1 person found this helpful
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- Bruce Richard Fox
- 04-10-22
Helpful book for our polarization crisis
I give this book five stars because the United States doesn’t feel so united these days and this book offers helpful tools to bridge the political divide. Doing so helps us to maintain, strengthen, and repair our existing relationships and to form new ones with people who have walked different paths and have different values and perspectives. Guzmán calls polarization “the monster that convinces us that we are the monsters” and she provides an explanation of how we have gotten where we are and lots of road-tested ideas for talking to folks we disagree with. Guzmán is left of the political center, but she is very close with her parents, who are on the right. My favorite section of the book is the one about values, how we all have them and how their relative order of importance is behind our different views. By the way, if you are interested in this important work, check out Braver Angels, the largest organization of people on opposite sides of the political divide working to depolarize the country.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Stephanie
- 02-27-23
Convivir. Because coexisting is simply not enough.
I read this after a very difficult break up that led me to finding out that I was missing very critical tools in my tool belt for communication and understanding the other person, and making them feel seen. It Gave me a new framework to build from and start over again, and having a better life experience and connecting with other people. I highly recommend this read, this audiobook to anybody trying to connect and trying to bridge the gap, bridge to divide in their circles.
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- Pedro Ibarra
- 09-06-24
INTOIT
Literally made me think of things a different way but doesn’t make me agree with them just understand them.
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- Crockett
- 06-26-22
Fantastic and Timely
The author does a great job explaining practical ways to communicate by coming from a place of learning. I'll be listening a second time. This time, though, with a pen and notepad.
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- Daryl
- 01-27-23
The art of conversation is lost
I loved this book because I hate written rules. In today's world we want a law for everything, because we don't really speak about anything, instead digging in our heels.
Monica lays out a road map back to conversation without (trying to ) offend the "other". I hope I can remember the tips laid out here when I'm in the heat of the moment.
The art of conversation is lost.....no more.
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- E. G. Leavitt
- 03-15-24
great tips
good book, well written and good tips! I enjoyed the book and definitely recommend.
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- Steven
- 02-27-25
useful for a 72-year-old woman
serious subject with a light-hearted tone. easy to listen to. great illustrative stories. useful for multiple arenas of talking with others.
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- Carrie
- 10-04-22
Great insight, suggestions and energy.
Learned a ton about how to be curious, how to call out the elephant in the room with less judgement.
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- Tara Peyman
- 05-26-23
A much needed book during these times!
I have talked about this book to so many of my friends. It’s a great way to help bring understanding and increase the chance of productive cooperation and collaboration in such a divisive, polarized world. All of our elected officials need to read this book!
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