The Mad Elf
A LitRPG Adventure
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Narrated by:
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P.J. Ochlan
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By:
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Ned Caratacus
About this listen
"Are you still alive? Then you're still learning."
Era Gualtieri lives his life on permanent hard mode. His right leg is gone, his hometown was bombed into toxic waste, and he's elvish in an age when pointy ears are the mother of all "kick me" signs. He's spent the past four years hopping trains and shoplifting just to survive, with only his flying sword to keep him safe.
Now, he's suddenly the only guy on the planet who's legally allowed to stop the new Dark Lord.
But Era's in no mood to bail out. Besides, his new government-appointed comrades (the edgiest sorceress in the food court, and a healer who's all heart and zero percent brains) wouldn't stand for such nonsense.
But there's an ancient conspiracy lurking at the heart of the whole Dark Lord fiasco, keeping the world in a cycle of constant violence for profit. Era's determined to get to the bottom of it, even if it means being branded an outlaw for the rest of his life.
Give a Gualtieri two paths to choose, and he'll take the third.
Neverstone: Mad Elf is a zany love letter to JRPGs far and wide. Thrilling, morbidly hilarious, and character-driven - what else can you ask for from a LitRPG Adventure?
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Katrina Darling’s only real friend has been murdered. And not just murdered - ritually sacrificed by a serial killer. Kat is sure more death will follow. She should know...she used to be the monster plunging the blade in. Trouble is, after 300 years of being a vampire, Kat has forgotten what it means to be human. One thing she does remember is that friends matter. Now she's determined to find whoever - or whatever - killed her friend before more victims surface. But just as the hunt begins, a mysterious young man discovers exactly what she was.
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Ugh
- By MsNing on 05-12-22
By: Ramy Vance
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Storm Front
- The Dresden Files, Book 1
- By: Jim Butcher
- Narrated by: James Marsters
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
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A call from a distraught wife, and another from Lt. Murphy of the Chicago PD Special Investigation Unit makes Harry believe things are looking up, but they are about to get worse, much worse. Someone is harnessing immense supernatural forces to commit a series of grisly murders. Someone has violated the first law of magic: Thou Shalt Not Kill. Tracking that someone takes Harry into the dangerous underbelly of Chicago, from mobsters to vampires....
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Excellent Story, Distracting Sound Engineering
- By Tom on 05-20-10
By: Jim Butcher
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The Epic Crush of Genie Lo
- By: F. C. Yee
- Narrated by: Nancy Wu
- Length: 8 hrs and 42 mins
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The struggle to get into a top-tier college consumes 16-year-old Genie's every waking thought. But when she discovers she's a celestial spirit who's powerful enough to bash through the gates of heaven with her fists, her perfectionist existence is shattered. Enter Quentin, a transfer student from China whose tone-deaf assertiveness beguiles Genie to the brink of madness. Quentin nurtures Genie's bodacious transformation - sometimes gently, sometimes aggressively - as her sleepy suburb in the Bay Area comes under siege from hell spawn.
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Enjoyed it more than I expected.
- By kevin on 07-27-21
By: F. C. Yee
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Death Becomes Her
- The Kurtherian Gambit, Book 1
- By: Michael Anderle
- Narrated by: Emily Beresford
- Length: 6 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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What you thought you knew about vampires and werewolves is wrong...so very, very, wrong. A thousand years of effort to keep the Unknown World hidden is unraveling and the Patriarch is tired. He needs to find someone to take over. He finds Bethany Anne.
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Vamp action at its' finest
- By BikeVON on 04-19-17
By: Michael Anderle
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The Age of Ra
- Pantheon, Book 1
- By: James Lovegrove
- Narrated by: Andy Cresswell
- Length: 10 hrs and 56 mins
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The Ancient Egyptian gods have defeated all the other pantheons and claimed dominion over the earth, dividing it into warring factions. Lt. David Westwynter, a British soldier, stumbles into Freegypt, the only place to have remained independent of the gods’ influence. There, he encounters the followers of a humanist leader known as the Lightbringer, who has vowed to rid mankind of the shackles of divine oppression. As the world heads towards an apocalyptic battle, there is far more to this freedom fighter than it seems.
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Fun but trite
- By Patrick Quinn on 02-10-21
By: James Lovegrove
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Unfettered
- Tales By Masters of Fantasy
- By: Terry Brooks, Patrick Rothfuss, Robert Jordan, and others
- Narrated by: Peter Ganim, Marc Vietor, Bronson Pinchot, and others
- Length: 20 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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You define life or it defines you. In Shawn Speakman’s case, it was both. Lacking health insurance and diagnosed with Hodgkin’s lymphoma in 2011, Shawn quickly accrued a massive medical debt that he did not have the ability to pay. That’s when New York Times best-selling author Terry Brooks offered to donate a short story that Shawn could sell to help alleviate those bills—and suggested he ask the same of his other writer friends. Unfettered is the result: An anthology built in order to relieve that debt, featuring short stories by some of the best fantasy writers in the genre.
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A TRULY BAD COLLECTION OF DOGS
- By Randall on 12-21-18
By: Terry Brooks, and others
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The Red Scrolls of Magic
- The Eldest Curses
- By: Cassandra Clare, Wesley Chu
- Narrated by: BD Wong
- Length: 10 hrs and 48 mins
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All Magnus Bane wanted was a vacation - a lavish trip across Europe with Alec Lightwood, the shadowhunter who against all odds is finally his boyfriend. But as soon as the pair settles in Paris, an old friend arrives with news about a demon-worshiping cult called the Crimson Hand that is bent on causing chaos around the world. A cult that was apparently founded by Magnus himself. Years ago. As a joke. Now, Magnus and Alec must race across Europe to track down the Crimson Hand and its elusive new leader before the cult can cause any more damage.
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OMG! I CANNOT WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE!!!
- By Anonymous User on 04-10-19
By: Cassandra Clare, and others
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The Henchmen Chronicles Collection, Books 1-5
- By: Craig Halloran
- Narrated by: Alexander Cendese
- Length: 39 hrs and 37 mins
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Contains the complete Henchmen Chronicles series.
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for a credit, why not
- By Daniel on 06-24-23
By: Craig Halloran
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Axe Druid Omnibus: Books 1-3
- By: Christopher Johns
- Narrated by: B.J. Harrison
- Length: 52 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Chris and his friends had been hearing voices begging for help, but aren’t dreams supposed to stay dreams? When they finally answer the call, they’re pulled into a fantastic world with themes similar to modern role-playing games. The world of Brindolla.
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harem
- By Anthony Baker on 03-21-24
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The Nate Temple Series: Books 0-3
- The Nate Temple Series Boxset Book 1
- By: Shayne Silvers
- Narrated by: Joel Richards
- Length: 41 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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My name is Nate Temple, and I’m secretly a wizard. I ride a foul-mouthed unicorn, I drink with Achilles, and I’m pals with the Four Horsemen. I’ve even cow-tipped the Minotaur. I understand the theory of following the rules...I’m just not very good at the application. Because rules were meant to be broken, and St. Louis has a bit of a supernatural infestation these days. Someone should probably be keeping an eye on these things -and probably an eye on me, too. Before I blow up another building...or three.
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Basically Batman with lizard brain
- By Ross Hageman on 04-01-20
By: Shayne Silvers
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Fractured Souls
- By: E. A. Copen
- Narrated by: Matt Cowlrick, Erin DeWard
- Length: 8 hrs and 8 mins
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Rogue wizard Josiah Quinn never met a rule he wouldn’t break. Even though he knows he’ll face plenty of backlash from both good and evil, he braves the fires of Hell to spring Satan’s captive daughter. But before they return to their lives, he’s got to track down the missing pieces of her soul.... As he attempts to unite the fragmented spirit of the succubus by his side, Josiah has one little problem: a power-hungry wizard aiming to rule the underworld.
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It grew on me - and I'm not done with this series
- By JEN on 06-30-20
By: E. A. Copen
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Adrian was on his way to work when he was summoned to another world. A world of magic and monsters, where he finds himself more alive than he has ever been on Earth. But also, where death awaits him in any corner, and he must become stronger. But at first, before he can even fight, he has to run, because he is too weak to win a battle against even the weakest monster. And that is why he invests all of his Essence Points into his Agility. Which eventually gives him the potential to overcome almost all his enemies— with the small caveat that he does not get hit, of course. His immense speed...
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Yesterday, Altai was a war hero. Today, he is a prisoner who chose exile to Rhapsody instead of death. This planet, the Range, knows no mercy. Here, thousands of prisoners fight each other for a place under the strange, cold sun. Here, the leftover alien biomechanisms and out-of-control Terran war machines roam in the ruins, and human life is measured in virtual experience that can be exchanged for armor and implants. Surviving in the Limbo slaughterhouse, upgrading to the 10th level, and getting into the Green Zone is all any dead man can hope for. Except not everyone succeeds.
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What happens when you suddenly find yourself in a reality of untold possibilities, in a place where technology and magic are indistinguishable? Every game location is a transformed physical world connected to others through an interstellar network of portals. Every player "avatar" is a living physical body with incredible survival traits. Once in this dreamscape, it would be unwise to not seize the moment! There are, however, a couple of catches.
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It started with a girl. Her father, as it turned out, was a barbaric maniac. Decades into the 21st century, the madman seemed terribly out of place. Yet he was also a powerful mogul - and determined to turn the life of every man who had ever been romantically involved with his daughter into a particular variant of hell only made possible by the latest VR technology. All 17 of his girl's former lovers would suffer in virtual reality until they snapped. For the first 16, the project succeeded. But the 17th was different. The 17th was Dark.
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Good start, can't wait to see where it goes from here.
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The Great Ones arrived on Earth and conquered us with little bloodshed. They collected our strongest warriors and shipped them off to a world called Hadran—a one-of-a-kind artificial planet, a cosmic gladiatorial arena where the slave races engage in blood sports for the Great Ones' entertainment. But Earth has lost the last of its real champions and now risks losing its candidate status. If that happens, it will become less than a slave colony.
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The battle with the Patriarch.
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Trojan Nightmare
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A tragic event called Violet Rain, or Purple Rain led to billions of deaths, civilization collapsing, and monsters roaming the planet. The danger of myths, legends, monsters, and portals to other worlds appearing on Earth has resulted in a surge of magical understanding and technological advancement.
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An awesome new direction for Blaise Corvin’s writing.
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The Unforgiven
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A lone DeathEater has forsaken his clan. Leaving behind his previous life, Skharr starts building a future next to a dangerous forest in an unknown land. He tells himself it is better than taking gold for questionable reasons. A lone old man travelling with a donkey offers him a choice: Continue this farm life, or trade him Skharr's just finished home and tilled land for a map. A map that Skharr can use to live large for years...if he survives.
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Kinda like an old Conan Book maybe.
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The Wasteland
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Enjoying his childhood, he paid no attention to the world, its secrets, or to those around him. Little did he know that his ignorance would be his undoing. Now, as an outcast looked down upon everyone, he has to endure humiliation as he stares into the eyes of the one who took everything from him. Life had taught him that the strong wouldn't hesitate to stab the weak in the back. But what if he became one of the strong?
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12 hours of bullying n not much else
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What listeners say about The Mad Elf
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- B.Y. McCray
- 11-30-24
I not sure
It took me almost a whole book to figure out what was going on if the next book wasn't free I don't think I would buy it but we'll see
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- George F Backofen
- 09-09-21
Better as You Go
P.J. Ochlan brings the entire cast of characters to life with unique and colorful voices for everyone, which is a relief since the the ensemble is quite large and diverse.
The story starts a bit slow for my taste, but once it gets moving, there is a sense that there is a whole world within it. We only get to scratch the surface of this world, but it's clear there is more to it than we see, and that makes it feel more real.
I was not fond of the narrative style, however. I felt it pulled me out of the immersion in a jerky and irregular pattern and it made me far to aware that I was listening to a story being told, rather than experiencing it. Towards the end, it becomes a bit more evident as to why, but I still didn't care for that aspect of it, much.
I'm on the fence as to whether I will continue with the next book, or if I've had my fill or this world. I like the characters and I like where the story seems to be headed, but I don't know that I want to spend the time jumping in and out of immersion for it.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 12-11-24
not gonna lie
it was odd. but overall a good listen. don't get me wrong the characters were great. but there were definitely flaws in the litrpg aspects. but overall it was quite humorous and felt trophy as heck.
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- Dallas Meck
- 09-21-21
The Best!
By flame, fleece and wheel this book is fantastic! It's hilarious, with a surprisingly good adventure. The world created by Ned Caratacus has been built masterfully. I am eagerly awaiting the second installment.
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- Fernando Granea
- 11-02-21
it's a lot of fun!!!
It's hilarious, creative, well written and i learned a lot about the genre, i absolutely recommend it!!!
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- Bryce
- 05-15-22
Don't Trust the Low Reviews,
Hello! I write reviews about books I like on here, as a few people do. Unfortunately, some people specifically write reviews because they see their views in the text, displayed openly, and they do not like it.
In, "The Mad Elf" The Primary villain is a race-supremacist, slur-touting, murder-happy idiot dude-bro and his cacophony of like-minded doofuses. They are portrayed as idiots without much in the way of critical thinking and social skills, in other words, this fantasy story about Elves, Dwarves, and Gods, has realistic villains that we all know and despise.
Some people think those kinds of folks aren't villains, however, I write this review after 3 consecutive mass shootings, one of which carried out on livestream by a man spouting about "Replacement Theory." Doing what the skin-heads are shown to be doing in chapter 1 of this very book, finding minorities and trying to find the easiest way to kill them while avoiding any blame for themselves.
Pick up this book, enjoy this book and its diverse set of characters, truly unique narration style, and systemic villains that we can all recognize as metaphor for our own world's problems. If you see my review and think "Wow, they aren't giving the other side enough credit" or "there's bad people on both sides" Please avoid this book, its glory is not for you.
If you are sick of all the hate, if you are LGBT, if you just want a story about nice people doing the right thing even though it can be VERY hard, then this book will be your refuge.
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- Tim
- 08-25-21
Can’t stop laughing - this is awesome!
Wow, this book is hilarious. It’s very strange (insert horse elemental, and that’s just getting started), but as you fall into this incredibly creative world, you also bust up laughing along the way.
This is my first PJ Ochlan narrated audiobook, but it won’t be my last. His ability to hit the snark and comedic tone is perfect. I’m so glad I bought this book!
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5 people found this helpful
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- Lizard
- 09-03-21
If Douglas Adams wrote an RPG after dropping acid
Favorite part was either the Taco Restaurant Mimic battle or the makeshift courtroom scene, this book is a riot. P.J. Ochlan knocked it outta the park with this one. I wasn't sure about the Koschei family having German accents but once I heard Gregor Koschei's morbidly hilarious plastic death gun advertisement, it won me over. Can't wait to listen to the next book!
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- Nisaa White
- 12-02-24
Berserker saved this book
I see what the author was trying to do. Bring to light that the far right and far left are all ididiots. It also shows the hypocritical nature of both sides... I can appreciate it.... The berserker and some of the narrations make this book actually funny. All and all it's a pretty good book with a pleasant combination of rpg, comedy, religion, politics... basically a Steampunk Monty Python Holy Grail kinda feel.
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- Daniel
- 03-14-22
Only thing I liked was the narrator
I'm not one to normally write reviews for stuff but I felt it appropriate in this particular case.
As I said in the title, one of the few things I liked about this book was the narrator. He was able to give each character a distinct voice and tone. I'd say the story idea had promise and I liked the fun narration tone of the writing style (although it could be a bit all over the place sometimes) but the author made basically the whole book overtly political. I don't mind some real-world politics in my books but the "big bad" wasn't well developed or written. It was basically what I think the author thinks of when they think of "the right" in terms of real life politics. I don't know about you, but when I read fiction I want a glimpse into another world. I want to laugh with the characters, I want to cry with them, I want to get angry with them, etc. I don't want to be preached at about controversial mondern day politics. This could have been so much better and I feel like the author could really make some fun stories if they could be more objective and focus in telling a story and not making hate mail for a group of people they disagree with.
I give the author one star, the story two stars, and the narrator five stars. I'll definitely be looking for more stuff he's done.
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3 people found this helpful