Swords. Sorcery. Dick Jokes. Truly do the gods smile upon you, dear listener, for the first four books in the hilarious Caverns and Creatures series are now available in one audiobook set. Join Tim, Dave, Julian, and Cooper as they are thrown into a hostile fantasy world filled with magic and monsters, and ruled over by a cruel and sadistic game master who taunts and harasses them while he sits back and eats their fried chicken.

A man. His ex-girlfriend's cat. A sadistic game show unlike anything in the universe: a dungeon crawl where survival depends on killing your prey in the most entertaining way possible. In a flash, every human-erected construction on Earth - from Buckingham Palace to the tiniest of sheds - collapses in a heap, sinking into the ground. The buildings and all the people inside have all been atomized and transformed into the dungeon: an 18-level labyrinth filled with traps, monsters, and loot.

Large chests are said to encompass all manner of hopes and dreams. Men covet them. Women envy them. But one fact holds true - everyone wants to get their hands on some big ones. The same holds true for one intrepid adventurer - a strapping young lad by the name of Himmel. Armed with his grandfather's trusty longsword and the dream of being the strongest, he sets out on the journey of a lifetime!

What happens when the haggling is done and the shops are closed? When the quest has been given, the steeds saddled, and the adventurers are off to their next encounter? They keep the world running, the food cooked, and the horses shoed, yet what adventurer has ever spared a thought or concern for the Non-Player Characters? In the town of Maplebark, four such NPCs settle in for a night of actively ignoring the adventurers drinking in the tavern when things go quickly and fatally awry.

It was a day like any other when suddenly the world changed. The universe reached a threshold humanity didn’t even know existed, and it was time to finally be integrated into the vast multiverse. A place where power is the only thing anyone can truly rely on.

Hi. I am Brandon Thighmaster. Monk. Hero. Inspiration. I enjoy crunching, squats, looking at myself, looking at other people looking at myself, and long walks on the beach. I also do adventures and stuff, and I guess you can read about them here. But enough about you, let's talk about me. Brandon Thighmaster.

The decision to start a new life is never an easy one, but for Joe the transition was far from figurative. Becoming a permanent addition to a game world, it doesn't take long to learn that people with his abilities are actively hunted. In fact, if the wrong people gained knowledge of what he was capable of, assassins would appear in droves.

The collection begins with "The Ghost of Hooker Alley," which introduces listeners to 10-year-old Sarah and six-year-old Tommy. After a quick bus ride into town to buy a gun, Sarah and Tommy think their problems are all but solved. That is, until a creepy weirdo follows them into an alley. But they aren't the only ones in that alley.... "The Monkey's Penis" features Chris, a teenage boy who receives a birthday gift unlike any other. In "Gary's Children," a man's quest for stress relief leads to terror, and an unexpected kidnapping takes place in "Aliens Wrecked Our Kegger."

Jason logs into Awaken Online fed-up with reality. He's in desperate need of an escape, and this game is his ticket to finally feeling the type of power and freedom that are so sorely lacking in his real life. Awaken Online is a brand new virtual reality game that just hit the market, promising an unprecedented level of immersion. Yet Jason quickly finds himself pushed down a path he didn't expect. In this game, he isn't the hero. There are no damsels to save. There are no bad guys to vanquish.

Hank is a thug. He knows he's a thug. He has no problem with that realization. In his view the galaxy has given him a gift: a mutation that allows him to withstand great deals of physical trauma. He puts his abilities to the best use possible and that isn't by being a scientist. Besides, the space station Belvaille doesn't need scientists. It is not, generally, a thinking person's locale. It is the remotest habitation in the entire Colmarian Confederation. There is literally no reason to be there.

It’s not easy making the career jump from office-supplies-store middle manager to heroic interdimensional adventurer. At least, Jason tries to be heroic, but it's hard to be good when all your powers are evil. He’ll face off against cannibals, cultists, wizards, monsters...and that’s just on the first day. He’s going to need courage, he’s going to need wit, and he’s going to need some magic powers of his own. But first, he’s going to need pants.

Gifted with meta-human powers, Tori Rivas kept away from the limelight, preferring to work as a thief in the shadows. But when she's captured trying to rob a vault that belongs to a secret guild of villains, she's offered a hard choice: prove she has what it takes to join them or be eliminated. Apprenticed to one of the world's most powerful (and supposedly dead) villains, she is thrust into a strange world where the lines that divide superheroes and criminals are more complex than they seem.

After dying and being reborn into a world that's built like a video game, Jim has found himself stuck in a very old-world style new-player zone for low-level adventurers. Unfortunately, the zone fell out of use centuries ago, and no one told the monsters they were supposed to take it easy on the Noobs. Even worse, the only new player around is Jim. Jim has been given an opportunity, and he'll do his best to take advantage of it.

A peaceful organization of civilized planets is faced with a threat to their very existence. Desperate to save themselves, they turn for help to the most brutal, backward, violent species in the known galaxy: humans.

Sinclair Rutherford is a young Seattle cop with a taste for the finer things. Doing menial tasks and getting hassled by superiors he doesn't respect are definitely not "finer things". Good police work and bad luck lead him to crack a case that changes quickly from a career-making break into a high-profile humiliation when footage of his pursuit of the suspect - wildly inappropriate murder weapon in hand - becomes an Internet sensation.

Swords. Sorcery. Dick Jokes. Truly do the gods smile upon you, dear listener, for the first four books in the hilarious Caverns and Creatures series are now available in one audiobook set. Join Tim, Dave, Julian, and Cooper as they are thrown into a hostile fantasy world filled with magic and monsters, and ruled over by a cruel and sadistic game master who taunts and harasses them while he sits back and eats their fried chicken.

When freakish storms envelope the Earth, people start disappearing without a trace. Wild theories abound: Is it aliens, spontaneous combustion, or perhaps quantum entanglement? The only ones who might know are those who have vanished. An average group of gamers is setting up to start a new campaign. The storms rage across the world, but they only care about the game they are about to start. Little do they know that they would be next to disappear from the face of the Earth.

Udo's biggest problem isn't being a digger (that's low class), or staying drunk (that's damn expensive), or avoiding the Dwergaz (they're monsters), or even pissing off the supposed Gods. It's that his reality...well, it isn't what he thought. And now, he can't even afford to drink because his so-called friend Nicz is cutting into his business, digging up tin, iron, and copper. So Udo forms a new plan: clay. After all, clay jars are used to store everything: meat, herbs, and, his personal favorite, ale.

Two hundred years ago the earth was destroyed by the World’s Worst Day Ever. Keeping his head down for the last few centuries, a mutated vampire has taken advantage of the new post-apocalyptic normal. Now, Ryder is provided an opportunity to escape his tyrannical rule...but she won’t stand for simply disappearing; it’s time for justice. Taking one mutated vampire down should be no problem, right? Wrong! Throw in a newly developed herd of zombies, and Ryder is facing a full recipe for disaster. Get ready to enjoy the ride!

After the death of his best friend, Ryuk logs into the online fantasy world of Tritania in hopes of seeing her again. Joined by a cantankerous goblin, a famous Swedish gamer, and a dragon, his guild sets out on an epic quest to find Tamana. Despite pressures from the real world and a mysterious faction known as the Shinigami, Ryuk uncovers a mind-blowing secret....

In a world invaded by demons, it's up to Katie and her Killers to restore order while also evading enemies - and friends - who want her in the worst way.

He thought it was the end, and his gun sat ready to make sure. But an oddball offer from his last friend comes at the literal last second. Curiosity gets the best of him, and he finds himself sucked into iNcarn8, a game claiming to be a whole new life. Now, as Montana, the larger-than-life tank warrior, he has one more last time to get his life right.

What is a billionaire heiress supposed to do when all of her older siblings take to business like her parents, proving that business is in their blood. But not hers? There are many good choices. Unfortunately, Chloe decided that partying was the right one. Now, to keep her money, she’s required to attend daily meetings with the family psychologist - daily meetings about how she must change her present to change her future.

When I got the letter, I couldn't believe it. When I drove down the highway, I still couldn't believe it. And when I got there? I finally realized I had a purpose: breaking rocks with my crazy new roommates.

Chad Johnson built his following by being a troll. Online games, social media, you name it—he's there with a witty comeback. But when he goes too far during a televised stream, he's handed a punishment unlike any other. Instead of the usual ban or suspension, Chad's sentenced to thirty days of full immersion therapy in Isle of Mythos—a world of epic fantasy filled with dungeons and mythical creatures. The twist? He's forced to embody a forest troll, one of the most-despised races in Mythos.

Once upon a time, in an alleyway in the slums of the City of Lockes, a young and somewhat lonely boy named Sam Haversford turns a group of teenage douchebags into stone completely by accident. Of course, this catches the attention of a higher power, and Sam's pulled from the only world he knows to become an apprentice to the king's wizard, Morgan of Shadows.

Chase Berrymore dreams of adventure, excitement, and getting the heck out of her pastoral halven village. But when adventure finds her, she'll be scrambling to save her family and friends from a necromancer's wrath. Outmatched in almost every way, she'll have to use her wits, charisma, and a bit of divine favor to figure out the path to victory. Even worse, she'll have to figure out ways to deal with the weird and nigh-immortal beings that call themselves "playas"...and she'll have to do it with the most powerful weapon she has available: words.

"You have two days to pass your audition. You better pass it, feller. You’re joining the circus. Ain’t that the best news you ever got?" Delivered by a trio of psychotic clowns, this ultimatum plunges Jamie into the horrific alternate universe that is the centuries-old Pilo Family Circus, a borderline world between Hell and Earth from which humankind’s greatest tragedies have been perpetrated. Yet in this place - peopled by the gruesome, grotesque, and monstrous - where violence and savagery are the norm, Jamie finds that his worst enemy is himself.

When Caleb reported for his normal shift, he never expected to go from the front seat of his ambulance to a bloody battlefield in a medieval Fey Realm. Kidnapped and beaten unconscious, he wakes up with a concussion and a fresh tattoo. While this might not be totally unusual for him, having the tattoo project the image of his stats and equipment like an old school tabletop RPG kind of is.

The slumbering dragon has awakened. Ten years ago in a demonic underworld, my enemies almost killed me. With the help of a disguised demon serving his own agenda, I survived. Barely...After a decade off the supernatural grid, I needed to sip from Goibniu's Chalice of Agelessness to restore my eternal youth. What started as a quick trip changed dramatically when Goibniu uttered those two magic words...Retirement was fun while it lasted.

Swords. Sorcery. Dick Jokes. Truly do the gods smile upon you, dear listener, for the first four books in the hilarious Caverns and Creatures series are now available in one audiobook set. Join Tim, Dave, Julian, and Cooper as they are thrown into a hostile fantasy world filled with magic and monsters, and ruled over by a cruel and sadistic game master who taunts and harasses them while he sits back and eats their fried chicken.

This is a collection of six short stories from the Caverns and Creatures series. It includes the following stories: "Slimes and Misty Wieners", "Great Balls on Fire", "Your Anus Is a Gas Giant", "Clear and Present Ranger", "The Mimic's Chest", and "Styxian Stoners May Break My Boners".

This is a collection of the sixth six short stories in the Caverns and Creatures series...Sound interesting? The author thinks so too! Listen to 6d6 and experience the compelling world of dark humor and fantasy.

In October of 2013, Drew Hayes began posting a story to his website. Written over the thirteen days leading up to Halloween, when each chapter ended the next step was chosen by the readers. Sometimes this led to great discoveries and triumphs, other paths led to Dead Ends, though even in those there was much to be gleaned. For ten years, this tradition occurred, until in the year of 2022, the readers chose a finale. This is their story: a tale of deaths and decisions that spanned a decade.

Can you outrun the past? Can you outlive the future? One time traveler must find out. Accidental time traveler Ben Travers is thrown into a multiverse of adventure in this action-adventure through past and future. This compilation includes: In Times Like These, The Chronothon, The Day After Never, and The Warp Clock. Now you can get them in one volume! All the adventure at a fraction of the price. Start your time travel adventure today, because yesterday may be too late!