
Andrea Vernon and The Big Axe Acquisition
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $33.90
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Bahni Turpin
About this listen
The supervillains of DESTRON have conquered the country, The Big Axe has been imprisoned, and the heroes of the Corporation for UltraHuman Protection have been reduced to hiding behind a force field surrounding New York City.
And if that's not enough, Andrea Vernon is pregnant. With a Little Axe.
But Andrea’s not one to sit on the sidelines. She has to make a plan to save the country, rescue her boyfriend, and figure out what exactly people do with babies. And a whole new slate of enemies is coming for CUP, led by the newly installed dictator of America, Dr. Robotfury, and his ingenious mecha-administrative assistant who bears a rather frightening resemblance to Andrea.
It’s a lot to wrap up before you go on maternity leave.
©2021 Alexander C. Kane (P)2021 Audible Originals, LLC.Listeners also enjoyed...
-
John Dies at the End
- By: David Wong
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 14 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?
-
-
Vulgar Funny. 4.95 Sale Win.
- By C Yohe on 11-19-12
By: David Wong
-
Sign Here
- By: Claudia Lux
- Narrated by: MacLeod Andrews, Brittany Pressley
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Peyote Trip has a pretty good gig in the deals department on the fifth floor of Hell. Sure, none of the pens work, the coffee machine has been out of order for a century, and the only drink on offer is Jägermeister, but Pey has a plan—and all he needs is one last member of the Harrison family to sell their soul.
-
-
The Woman Narrator Is Incredibly Annoying
- By Mary Grace on 09-17-24
By: Claudia Lux
-
Dragon Heist
- By: Alexander C. Kane
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Birdie Binkowitz is just a little bitter. As a young actress, she was the toast of Hollywood, definitely destined for greatness. Then the dragons had to rise up from their thousand-year slumber, take over Earth and ruin everything. Twenty years later, Birdie is living her worst life in her hometown of Tuscaloosa, Alabama, working at her father's Seed and Feed (and Bagels). Then, a mysterious dragon appears in front of the store seeking her help. He’s got a bone to pick with his fellow dragons–and he wants to hit them where it hurts.
-
-
Just finished my second listen
- By Kalena on 05-05-23
-
Orlando People
- By: Alexander C. Kane
- Narrated by: Kristen Sieh
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Gretch Wolgast is a bit of a dud. Just ask her. She’s a 21-year-old college dropout who has a loser job at the mall. Sure, she can lift a tennis ball with her telekinetic powers. But only three feet in the air. And she has to be sitting. Gretch is an OP, one of thousands born in Orlando, Florida, in the early 1980s who mysteriously developed the ability to move things with their minds. Unfortunately, she turned out to be the weakest of the bunch. Now, Gretch’s life is being turned upside down. She witnesses a murder and discovers a wide-ranging conspiracy.
-
-
Super(natural) fun!
- By Jules H on 12-12-19
-
Underland
- A Dark Fantasy
- By: Maxime J. Durand, Void Herald
- Narrated by: Tim Campbell
- Length: 14 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Underland, hope has nearly been extinguished. All things living and undead exist under the dominion of the Dark Lords, whose power is all but unlimited and whose evil is all but eternal. Sorcerer Valdemar Verney is not one of them. The last of his line, Valdemar has devoted himself to locating his grandfather’s realm, a legendary place called Earth, where there is air and vibrant life. His latest attempt to uncover the way to Earth is thwarted, however, when the cunning Dark Lord Och captures him—not to imprison him, but to nurture Valdemar’s talents for his own ends.
-
-
Best in class of the tired "reincarnation" trope.
- By Jacob on 09-07-22
By: Maxime J. Durand, and others
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
John Dies at the End
- By: David Wong
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 14 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?
-
-
Vulgar Funny. 4.95 Sale Win.
- By C Yohe on 11-19-12
By: David Wong
-
Sign Here
- By: Claudia Lux
- Narrated by: MacLeod Andrews, Brittany Pressley
- Length: 10 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Peyote Trip has a pretty good gig in the deals department on the fifth floor of Hell. Sure, none of the pens work, the coffee machine has been out of order for a century, and the only drink on offer is Jägermeister, but Pey has a plan—and all he needs is one last member of the Harrison family to sell their soul.
-
-
The Woman Narrator Is Incredibly Annoying
- By Mary Grace on 09-17-24
By: Claudia Lux
-
Dragon Heist
- By: Alexander C. Kane
- Narrated by: Khristine Hvam
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Birdie Binkowitz is just a little bitter. As a young actress, she was the toast of Hollywood, definitely destined for greatness. Then the dragons had to rise up from their thousand-year slumber, take over Earth and ruin everything. Twenty years later, Birdie is living her worst life in her hometown of Tuscaloosa, Alabama, working at her father's Seed and Feed (and Bagels). Then, a mysterious dragon appears in front of the store seeking her help. He’s got a bone to pick with his fellow dragons–and he wants to hit them where it hurts.
-
-
Just finished my second listen
- By Kalena on 05-05-23
-
Orlando People
- By: Alexander C. Kane
- Narrated by: Kristen Sieh
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Gretch Wolgast is a bit of a dud. Just ask her. She’s a 21-year-old college dropout who has a loser job at the mall. Sure, she can lift a tennis ball with her telekinetic powers. But only three feet in the air. And she has to be sitting. Gretch is an OP, one of thousands born in Orlando, Florida, in the early 1980s who mysteriously developed the ability to move things with their minds. Unfortunately, she turned out to be the weakest of the bunch. Now, Gretch’s life is being turned upside down. She witnesses a murder and discovers a wide-ranging conspiracy.
-
-
Super(natural) fun!
- By Jules H on 12-12-19
-
Underland
- A Dark Fantasy
- By: Maxime J. Durand, Void Herald
- Narrated by: Tim Campbell
- Length: 14 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Underland, hope has nearly been extinguished. All things living and undead exist under the dominion of the Dark Lords, whose power is all but unlimited and whose evil is all but eternal. Sorcerer Valdemar Verney is not one of them. The last of his line, Valdemar has devoted himself to locating his grandfather’s realm, a legendary place called Earth, where there is air and vibrant life. His latest attempt to uncover the way to Earth is thwarted, however, when the cunning Dark Lord Och captures him—not to imprison him, but to nurture Valdemar’s talents for his own ends.
-
-
Best in class of the tired "reincarnation" trope.
- By Jacob on 09-07-22
By: Maxime J. Durand, and others
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
-
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
Into the Real
- TransDimensional Hunter, Book 1
- By: John Ringo, Lydia Sherrer
- Narrated by: Sarah Mollo-Christensen
- Length: 18 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lynn Raven may be the boss master of WarMonger 2050 with her online persona of "Larry the Snake", but when the CEO of Tsunami Entertainment personally asks her, as a favor, to beta test a new augmented-reality game, she has to face her greatest fear: going outside and dealing with, ugh, people.
-
-
Hunters Ready!
- By EchoSniper on 11-30-22
By: John Ringo, and others
-
Extinction Reversed
- Project Transhuman, Book 1
- By: J.S. Morin
- Narrated by: Mikael Naramore
- Length: 11 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Charlie7 is the progenitor of a mechanical race he built from the ashes of a dead world—Earth. He is a robot of leisure and idle political meddling—a retirement well-earned. Or he was, until a human girl named Eve was dropped in his lap. Geneticists have restored Earth’s biome and begun repopulation. But primate cloning is in its infancy; human cloning is banned. Far from a failed genetics experiment, Eve is brilliant, curious, and heartbreakingly naïve about her species’ history. But Eve’s creator wants her back and has a gruesome fate planned for her.
-
-
Do not buy
- By pete on 04-09-23
By: J.S. Morin
-
Oh, Great! I Was Reincarnated as a Farmer
- By: Benjamin Kerei
- Narrated by: Travis Baldree
- Length: 17 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Accidentally murdered by a cleric in another universe during a botched resurrection, Arnold, a semi-pro gamer, wakes upon an altar to find himself incarnated into the overweight body of a farmer who could have been his fatter twin. He’s not the hero. He’s not the villain. He’s certainly not the chosen one who is there to save the world. He’s a clerical error. It could be a bad joke, but apparently, it happens so often that they have a standard procedure for returning you.
-
-
Not bad, but not as good as the hype suggests.
- By Christopher on 09-20-21
By: Benjamin Kerei
-
Space Academy Dropouts
- Space Academy, Book 1
- By: C.T. Phipps, Michael Suttkus
- Narrated by: Jeffrey Kafer
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The newly renamed Vance Turbo has sabotaged his own career at Space Fleet Academy due to a desire to atone for a training accident. Unfortunately, his actions result in him getting press-ganged into an expendable crew of misfits recruited by a legendary starship captain. Their mission? To recover a collection of lost sun-destroying missiles that could restart a galactic war. Unfortunately, Vance is smart enough to know something is wrong with this picture. After all, no sane person would recruit this crew to save the universe.
-
-
Fun, entertaining, adventurous!
- By Montzalee Wittmann on 04-15-22
By: C.T. Phipps, and others
-
Vigor Mortis: Volume 1
- Vigor Mortis, Book 1
- By: Natalie Maher, Thundamoo
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy
- Length: 14 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Casting necromancy without ever learning how to isn't supposed to be possible. A starving orphan girl named Vita is somehow managing it anyway, and she's not sure if this is going to be the solution to her life's problems or a horrifying, spiraling mess of problems she can hardly conceive.
-
-
How do I put this…
- By Jonathan Yelli on 01-21-22
By: Natalie Maher, and others
-
Dead Mech Walking
- Armored Souls, Book 1
- By: Xavier P. Hunter
- Narrated by: Mikael Naramore
- Length: 11 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Sgt. Reggie King wakes up from a battlefield injury to find himself physically intact. But the hospital staff insist he’s not fit to return to duty. As part of his psychological recovery, they introduce him to a game. Armored Souls is a tank game on steroids. Giant, walking mechs called juggernauts engage in interplanetary wars as noble houses and mercenary factions wage endless battles for supremacy. For the pilots of these juggernauts, the rewards are glory, cash, and XP.
-
-
Makes me want to play armored core again
- By LOKI on 04-13-23
By: Xavier P. Hunter
-
Sidekick
- Raptors, Book 1
- By: Jaime Castle, C.J. Valin
- Narrated by: Jackie Meloche
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
My name is Sawyer William Vincent - I know, it sounds like three first names - but most people know me as the Red Raptor. Well, technically no one knows I'm the Red Raptor, he's just a bit more popular. Wow. Enough about my name. Let me start over. I’m a superhero - the legendary Black Harrier’s partner. Not sidekick. I don't care if I'm still in high school. We work together to bring down the city's most dangerous villains. When the Black Harrier gets a mysterious note, then goes missing in New York City, things are pretty much left up to me. But don’t worry...I’ve got this.
-
-
Whoa, Jack Meloche
- By Rob Bew on 03-24-21
By: Jaime Castle, and others
-
The Utterly Uninteresting and Unadventurous Tales of Fred, the Vampire Accountant
- By: Drew Hayes
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 7 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Timid, socially awkward, and plagued by self-esteem issues, Fred has never been the adventurous sort. One fateful night - different from the night he died, which was more inconvenient than fateful - Fred reconnects with an old friend at his high school reunion. This rekindled relationship sets off a chain of events thrusting him right into the chaos of the parahuman world.
-
-
Stories are great, not crazy about the format
- By Sugarpucker on 08-10-15
By: Drew Hayes
-
Ritualist
- Completionist Chronicles, Book 1
- By: Dakota Krout
- Narrated by: Vikas Adam
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The decision to start a new life is never an easy one, but for Joe the transition was far from figurative. Becoming a permanent addition to a game world, it doesn't take long to learn that people with his abilities are actively hunted. In fact, if the wrong people gained knowledge of what he was capable of, assassins would appear in droves.
-
-
Ritual is necessary for us to know anything
- By LITRPG Audiobook Reviews on 05-18-18
By: Dakota Krout
-
Forging Hephaestus
- Villains' Code Series, Book 1
- By: Drew Hayes
- Narrated by: Amy Landon
- Length: 26 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Gifted with meta-human powers, Tori Rivas kept away from the limelight, preferring to work as a thief in the shadows. But when she's captured trying to rob a vault that belongs to a secret guild of villains, she's offered a hard choice: prove she has what it takes to join them or be eliminated. Apprenticed to one of the world's most powerful (and supposedly dead) villains, she is thrust into a strange world where the lines that divide superheroes and criminals are more complex than they seem.
-
-
A Nice Surprise with some Really Fun Characters
- By Small Mountain on 09-29-17
By: Drew Hayes
-
Hammered
- Legacy of Magic, Book 1
- By: Lindsay Buroker
- Narrated by: Vivienne Leheny
- Length: 9 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
She’s happy renovating homes and occasionally thumping bad guys until she learns of a mysterious artifact hidden under the house she’s working on. Everybody from humans to orcs to werewolves wants it, and they’re willing to kill to get it. Things go from bad to worse when someone frames her for murder.
-
-
it's just okay, read the Kindle book.
- By Quinn on 04-16-23
By: Lindsay Buroker
-
He Who Fights with Monsters: A LitRPG Adventure
- He Who Fights with Monsters, Book 1
- By: Shirtaloon, Travis Deverell
- Narrated by: Heath Miller
- Length: 28 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It’s not easy making the career jump from office-supplies-store middle manager to heroic interdimensional adventurer. At least, Jason tries to be heroic, but it's hard to be good when all your powers are evil. He’ll face off against cannibals, cultists, wizards, monsters...and that’s just on the first day. He’s going to need courage, he’s going to need wit, and he’s going to need some magic powers of his own. But first, he’s going to need pants.
-
-
Great!
- By tb3 on 03-10-21
By: Shirtaloon, and others

About the Creator

About the Performer
What listeners say about Andrea Vernon and The Big Axe Acquisition
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- DaisyBell
- 07-18-21
Another magical book
Fun and romcoms and lovely ending of this story arc. I’ve loved every single one in this series and hope there will be more!
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Kandi Valentine
- 09-21-21
Bahni Turpin takes this to a whole new level!
While the story is in itself, entertaining, Bahni Turpin's performance takes this to a whole new level. She brings such life to the characters.. you can't help but feel you know each one of them personally.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Nemo71
- 08-12-21
The Shaolin Soccer of the superhero genre
These books have been fun. Alexander Kane's writing is droll and absurdist, yet grounded, and Bahni Turpin has good crazy fun with it, It's not only an amazing comic performance but also subtle and well observed. They're so attuned to each other that you forget that there was both a writer and a narrator.
You can only take this sort of schtick so far, though, and Kane wisely structured this as a trilogy and brought it to a definite end. If you stop before it's too late, you'll never come to any harm, as the Taoist saying goes. Well done.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- La Madre de Isa
- 01-26-22
Another Amazing Story!!!!
Ok, it's official! This series combined with Bahni's reading is my all time favorite!!!!!! I NEED another book stat! The writing is entertaining and exciting and Bahni's different voices are really good. I can really visualize what is happening as I listen. This series would make a great movie series!!! Thank you, Mr. Kane and Ms. Turpin, thank you!!!!👏👏👏
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Victoria
- 09-03-22
FABULOUS!
Love this narrator and hoping for more books in the series. Many, MANY more. "Glaaaaaare!!!"
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Roni Garrison-Joyner
- 12-01-22
Banhi Turpin never disappoints!
I enjoyed all the books in this series due in no small part to the narrator’s dynamic and exciting performance. I’ve been running around my house saying “I am at my brightest when night is at its nightest!” “GLARE!!” I literally forget that it’s just one person doing all those voices.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- C. Porter
- 03-20-23
the third does not disappoint...
I am hoping for a 4th installment, hopefully with the characters identified in the epilogue.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Shannon Mueller
- 10-13-23
Sets the bar
This series sets the bar for audio books. Great story that pulls all of the threads together in the end. Amazing narration. Bahni Turpin is my absolute favorite audio book narrator. She brings the story to life.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- another know it all
- 09-24-23
I like this series
But, it gets a bit repetitive and I’m not sure I am going to continue. But I think I felt that way after the last and I did enjoy this one.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Michele C.
- 04-23-24
Entertaining, Fun, Whimsical
I enjoyed this while series of wacky super heroes and villains. Their names made me smile every time I heard them. Thoroughly enjoyed the humor. Highly recommended for a break from reality.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!