
Secure Love
Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime
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Narrated by:
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Julie Menanno
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By:
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Julie Menanno
About this listen
Create a lasting and loving attachment with this national bestseller, a “must-read for every couple, at any stage of their relationship” (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone) from the expert couple’s therapist behind the popular Instagram account @TheSecureRelationship.
What does a healthy relationship look like?
A good question, in theory, but couple’s therapist Julie Menanno wants you to consider: what does a securely attached relationship feel like?
The answer to this question is the ultimate goal in Secure Love, an “incredibly wise and helpful guide” (Jen Sincero, New York Times bestselling author of You Are a Badass) to understanding secure attachment in adult relationships. While attachment theory has grown in popularity to explain the relationship between children and their caregivers, it’s also the closest science has come to making sense of our adult romantic connections.
In this book Julie Menanno, the expert behind the popular Instagram account @TheSecureRelationship, tackles:
-Why you and your partner have the same fight over and over (hint: it’s called a negative cycle, and underlying every fight, argument, silent treatment, or passive-aggressive comment is an unmet attachment need).
-“Instead of that, say this” suggested scripts of how to approach difficult situations in your relationship more effectively.
-The four attachment types, with exercises to understand you and your partner’s attachment style.
-How to improve communication, including staying connected during conflict by prioritizing vulnerability rather than protecting yourself.
-Why insecure attachment negatively impacts a couple’s sex life and how to ignite that sexual connection.
Secure Love is a crash course in understanding how you show up in a relationship and guides you on getting out of negative cycles to find safety in one another. In doing so, “you’ll be armed with eternal wisdom for strengthening your relationship” (Dr. Sue Johnson, founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy for Couples and bestselling author of Hold Me Tight) and establish a secure attachment with your partner to create the bond you’ve been longing for.
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Love Sense
- The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships
- By: Dr. Sue Johnson
- Narrated by: Dr. Sue Johnson
- Length: 12 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Every day, we hear of relationships failing and questions of whether humans are meant to be monogamous. Love Sense presents new scientific evidence that tells us that humans are meant to mate for life. Dr. Johnson explains that romantic love is an attachment bond, just like that between mother and child, and shows us how to develop our "love sense" - our ability to develop long-lasting relationships. Love is not the least bit illogical or random, but actually an ordered and wise recipe for survival.
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No real tips on HOW to become more securely attach
- By Sophia on 11-10-15
By: Dr. Sue Johnson
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The Anxious Hearts Guide
- Rising Above Anxious Attachment
- By: Rikki Cloos
- Narrated by: Rikki Cloos
- Length: 5 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s been three days with no call or text back...you can’t eat, sleep, or work. You’re going to die alone in your bed, gripping your phone, waiting for a response; or at least that’s what your brain keeps telling you. There’s a common flaw that people who chase partners all have in common. Are you an anxious attacher? If you’re still holding your phone hoping they’ll reply then drop it now and pick up this book.
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Helpful
- By Jessica H. on 06-28-24
By: Rikki Cloos
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Wired for Love (Second Edition)
- How Understanding Your Partner's Brain and Attachment Style Can Help You Defuse Conflict and Build a Secure Relationship
- By: Stan Tatkin PsyD MFT, Harville Hendrix PhD - foreword
- Narrated by: Stan Tatkin
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Every person is wired for love differently—with different habits, needs, and reactions to conflict. The good news is that most people's minds work in predictable ways and respond well to security, attachment, and routines, making it possible to neurologically prime the brain for greater love and connection and fewer conflicts. This go-to guide will show you how.
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Really helpful book
- By Lilly on 08-07-24
By: Stan Tatkin PsyD MFT, and others
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5 Reasons Why Your Relationship Won’t Last
- By: Jillian Turecki
- Narrated by: Jillian Turecki
- Length: 1 hr and 2 mins
- Original Recording
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People sabotage their relationships all the time without even knowing it! Jillian will share the five sneaky reasons why your current or future relationship won’t make it and what you can do about it. Expect about 10 minutes of teachings followed by extensive Q&A with Jillian.
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incredible insights
- By jes_solo18 on 01-07-25
By: Jillian Turecki
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Insecure in Love
- How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It
- By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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In Insecure in Love, you'll learn how to overcome attachment anxiety using compassionate self-awareness, a technique that can help you recognize your negative thoughts or unhealthy behavior patterns and respond to them in a nurturing way - rather than beating yourself up. You'll also learn how insecurity can negatively affect healthy dialog between you and your partner (or potential partners) and develop the skills needed to stop you from reverting back to old patterns of neediness and possessiveness.
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attachment theory
- By erika on 02-08-16
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Avoidant Attachment Recovery
- 5 Steps to Overcome Fear of Intimacy, Strengthen Connections and Transition from Avoidant to Secure Attachment (Fostering Personal Development)
- By: Amy Harper
- Narrated by: Keira Grace
- Length: 3 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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-Are you finding it hard to be close and open in your relationships?- Do you often find yourself withdrawing emotionally, maintaining a rigid self-sufficiency that ultimately leaves you feeling isolated and disconnected?- Are you on the quest for a sense of true emotional independence while still fostering deep and meaningful relationships?
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Disappointed
- By Katie Sarpy on 04-20-25
By: Amy Harper
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Anxious Attachment Recovery
- Go from Being Clingy to Confident & Secure in Your Relationships (Break Free and Recover from Unhealthy Relationships)
- By: Linda Hill
- Narrated by: Alene Sorensen
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Moths that get too close to the light burn their wings. Men and women who become too attached to their partners tear their relationships apart. Your relationship doesn't have to end in heartache like so many others.
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Healing Anxious Attachment
- By Jamie Bee on 08-25-23
By: Linda Hill
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How to Be the Love You Seek
- Break Cycles, Find Peace, and Heal Your Relationships
- By: Dr. Nicole LePera
- Narrated by: Courtney Patterson
- Length: 10 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Relationships have always been essential to human survival. Our bodies and brains are programmed to seek out connection, whether familial, romantic, or platonic. And yet, these vital bonds are often at the root of our deepest suffering. While our hearts are primed for compassionate connection, our nervous systems—which store all our past hurts and disappointments—are wired for threat and negativity.
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The conclusion— was this one big rationalization for self indulgence?
- By Susan G DeLorenzo on 04-30-24
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Us
- Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
- By: Terrence Real
- Narrated by: Terrence Real, Bruce Springsteen
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results.
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I preferred Fierce Intimacy
- By Jose on 06-23-22
By: Terrence Real
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Liberated Love
- Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire
- By: Mark Groves, Kylie McBeath
- Narrated by: Kylie McBeath, Mark Groves
- Length: 9 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Groves and McBeath’s work—through their Create the Love seminars, workbooks, and consultation programs—have educated a new generation of relationship seekers on the best ways to practice and cultivate love. In Liberated Love, you’ll explore your original relationship blueprint and learn how it informs your current relationships (spoiler alert: it’s often a pretty direct line), and discover how limitation can be the key to finding freedom and experiencing full, fully-realized love with another person.
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Thank you
- By Anonymous User on 07-03-24
By: Mark Groves, and others
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The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
- A Practical Guide from the Country’s Foremost Relationship Expert, Revised and Updated
- By: John M. Gottman PhD, Nan Silver
- Narrated by: Eric Michael Summerer
- Length: 10 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Just as Masters and Johnson were pioneers in the study of human sexuality, so Dr. John Gottman has revolutionized the study of marriage. As a professor of psychology at the University of Washington and the founder and director of the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, he has studied the habits of married couples in unprecedented detail over the course of many years. His findings, and his heavily attended workshops, have already turned around thousands of faltering marriages.
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not a good audiobook
- By jynlyn on 09-02-20
By: John M. Gottman PhD, and others
I Have Hope for Healing
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I've been recommending it to everyone!
Above anyone can benefit from
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I feel like my wife and I have a great relationship already - but I always struggled with “am I loving enough” and “what is love?”
I now have tools to be more in control of triggers and we can have much better conversations and solve things together.
Thanks for this, it was all I needed!
Just What I Needed
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Real examples of how to communicate differently
Amazing
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Lots of great info
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Attachment styles and the deep impact they have
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Simplify conflict resolution
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Great Read!
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Love the reading, love the examples, I feel like I was just given a phenomenal tool to use in all my relationships. DO NOT pass up the opportunity
If only we had this teaching as kids
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So incredibly helpful
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