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The Anxious Hearts Guide
Rising Above Anxious Attachment
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Narrated by:
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Rikki Cloos
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By:
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Rikki Cloos
About this listen
It’s been three days with no call or text back...you can’t eat, sleep, or work. You’re going to die alone in your bed, gripping your phone, waiting for a response; or at least that’s what your brain keeps telling you.
There’s a common flaw that people who chase partners all have in common. Are you an anxious attacher? If you’re still holding your phone hoping they’ll reply then drop it now and pick up this book.
Stop the self-fulfilling prophecy of worrying that your relationships will all end in disaster. Take a deep dive into healing your anxious attachment, learn how to boost your self-esteem and independence, and build a foundation for healthy love. The Anxious Hearts Guide is a collection of years of psychology research, book recommendations, and strategies to help supercharge your relational health and stop pushing potential partners away. It is an approachable, accessible, and enlightening window into why anxious attachers do the frustrating things that we do for love and how to rise above it.
©2021 Rikki Cloos (P)2023 Octopi Publishing PartnersListeners also enjoyed...
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This sequel to the bestselling The Anxious Hearts Guide dives deep into the complex dynamic between anxious and avoidant attachment styles. You'll learn why you crave closeness while your partner needs space, and how these opposing needs create a frustrating push-pull cycle.
By: Rikki Cloos
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Healing Your Attachment Wounds
- How to Create Deep and Lasting Intimate Relationships
- By: Diane Poole Heller
- Narrated by: Diane Poole Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
From our earliest years, teaches Diane Poole Heller, we develop an attachment style that follows us through life, replaying in our intimate relationships, with our children, and at work. And traumatic events can deeply affect that core relational blueprint. With Healing Your Attachment Wounds, a pioneer in attachment theory and trauma resolution brings together these two fields to help us understand and benefit from their complementary principles and methods.
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u mean i’m not doomed to self inflicted suffocating loneliness?
- By SidVid on 01-20-20
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Anxiously Attached
- Becoming More Secure in Life and Love
- By: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Narrated by: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Length: 9 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
An estimated 47 million Americans identify as having an anxious attachment style, which can make being in relationships turbulent and emotionally taxing for them. According to groundbreaking research in the field of attachment, anxious types are more prone to insecurity, jealousy, codependency, and other behaviors that get in the way of finding and sustaining love.
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So slow
- By RSC on 04-20-23
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Insecure in Love
- How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It
- By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Insecure in Love, you'll learn how to overcome attachment anxiety using compassionate self-awareness, a technique that can help you recognize your negative thoughts or unhealthy behavior patterns and respond to them in a nurturing way - rather than beating yourself up. You'll also learn how insecurity can negatively affect healthy dialog between you and your partner (or potential partners) and develop the skills needed to stop you from reverting back to old patterns of neediness and possessiveness.
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attachment theory
- By erika on 02-08-16
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Loving an Avoidant Partner
- Understand Dismissive Attachment Style to Bridge Emotional Distance and Create a Secure Relationship
- By: Krista Cantell
- Narrated by: Jennifer Perez
- Length: 4 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Introducing "Loving an Avoidant Partner," a groundbreaking guide that takes you deep into the enigmatic maze of an avoidant person's inner world like never before. Armed with remarkable insights, you'll decode the guarded secrets and fears of your elusive partner, shattering the barriers that have kept you apart.
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Great insight and easy to follow
- By Dede on 02-20-25
By: Krista Cantell
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The Complete Healing Journey for Anxious Attachers
- This Book Includes: Attachment Styles Mastery + Anxious Attachment No More!! Define Your Attachment Style, Decode Your Partner's Brain, Discover the Proven Shortcut to Ditch Your Anxiety Away, and Start Living Securely Attached
- By: Taha Zaid
- Narrated by: KC Wayman
- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
If you have an anxious attachment style, you may struggle to believe you will ever be worthy enough for potential partners, and you may doubt that relationships will ever work out. While it takes hard work to change an insecure attachment style, research shows that people can create secure attachment by doing work on themselves and facilitating better communication with partners. All you need is to learn the tools that this book provides and begin to apply them to your life.
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Perfect Book!
- By Elizabeth Uribe on 08-05-22
By: Taha Zaid
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Anxious and Avoidant
- Healing the Dynamic
- By: Rikki Cloos
- Narrated by: Rikki Cloos
- Length: 7 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
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Performance
-
Story
This sequel to the bestselling The Anxious Hearts Guide dives deep into the complex dynamic between anxious and avoidant attachment styles. You'll learn why you crave closeness while your partner needs space, and how these opposing needs create a frustrating push-pull cycle.
By: Rikki Cloos
-
Healing Your Attachment Wounds
- How to Create Deep and Lasting Intimate Relationships
- By: Diane Poole Heller
- Narrated by: Diane Poole Heller
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From our earliest years, teaches Diane Poole Heller, we develop an attachment style that follows us through life, replaying in our intimate relationships, with our children, and at work. And traumatic events can deeply affect that core relational blueprint. With Healing Your Attachment Wounds, a pioneer in attachment theory and trauma resolution brings together these two fields to help us understand and benefit from their complementary principles and methods.
-
-
u mean i’m not doomed to self inflicted suffocating loneliness?
- By SidVid on 01-20-20
-
Anxiously Attached
- Becoming More Secure in Life and Love
- By: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Narrated by: Jessica Baum LMHC
- Length: 9 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
An estimated 47 million Americans identify as having an anxious attachment style, which can make being in relationships turbulent and emotionally taxing for them. According to groundbreaking research in the field of attachment, anxious types are more prone to insecurity, jealousy, codependency, and other behaviors that get in the way of finding and sustaining love.
-
-
So slow
- By RSC on 04-20-23
-
Insecure in Love
- How Anxious Attachment Can Make You Feel Jealous, Needy, and Worried and What You Can Do About It
- By: Leslie Becker-Phelps PhD
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 6 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Insecure in Love, you'll learn how to overcome attachment anxiety using compassionate self-awareness, a technique that can help you recognize your negative thoughts or unhealthy behavior patterns and respond to them in a nurturing way - rather than beating yourself up. You'll also learn how insecurity can negatively affect healthy dialog between you and your partner (or potential partners) and develop the skills needed to stop you from reverting back to old patterns of neediness and possessiveness.
-
-
attachment theory
- By erika on 02-08-16
-
Loving an Avoidant Partner
- Understand Dismissive Attachment Style to Bridge Emotional Distance and Create a Secure Relationship
- By: Krista Cantell
- Narrated by: Jennifer Perez
- Length: 4 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Introducing "Loving an Avoidant Partner," a groundbreaking guide that takes you deep into the enigmatic maze of an avoidant person's inner world like never before. Armed with remarkable insights, you'll decode the guarded secrets and fears of your elusive partner, shattering the barriers that have kept you apart.
-
-
Great insight and easy to follow
- By Dede on 02-20-25
By: Krista Cantell
-
The Complete Healing Journey for Anxious Attachers
- This Book Includes: Attachment Styles Mastery + Anxious Attachment No More!! Define Your Attachment Style, Decode Your Partner's Brain, Discover the Proven Shortcut to Ditch Your Anxiety Away, and Start Living Securely Attached
- By: Taha Zaid
- Narrated by: KC Wayman
- Length: 5 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If you have an anxious attachment style, you may struggle to believe you will ever be worthy enough for potential partners, and you may doubt that relationships will ever work out. While it takes hard work to change an insecure attachment style, research shows that people can create secure attachment by doing work on themselves and facilitating better communication with partners. All you need is to learn the tools that this book provides and begin to apply them to your life.
-
-
Perfect Book!
- By Elizabeth Uribe on 08-05-22
By: Taha Zaid
-
Anxious Attachment Healing
- Overcoming Avoidant and Anxious Styles: A Recovery Book to Heal and Forge Healthier Relationships with No More Fear
- By: Amanda Thompson
- Narrated by: Barbara Fernandez
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Embark on a journey of healing and transformation with a guide that offers a profound understanding and resolution of anxious and avoidant attachment styles.
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Helpful as a teacher
- By Anonymous User on 05-22-24
By: Amanda Thompson
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Anxious Attachment Recovery
- Go from Being Clingy to Confident & Secure in Your Relationships (Break Free and Recover from Unhealthy Relationships)
- By: Linda Hill
- Narrated by: Alene Sorensen
- Length: 4 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Moths that get too close to the light burn their wings. Men and women who become too attached to their partners tear their relationships apart. Your relationship doesn't have to end in heartache like so many others.
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Healing Anxious Attachment
- By Jamie Bee on 08-25-23
By: Linda Hill
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Enough Overthinking
- 11 Insane Ways Overthinking Can Affect Your Health, Destroy Your Happiness, and Steal Your Joy–and How to Neutralize It
- By: Robert J. Charles
- Narrated by: Rodney Tompkins
- Length: 1 hr and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Overthinking is when your brain just won’t switch off. It feels like it’s stuck going around and around on the same loop as a hamster stuck on a wheel. But while the hamster is having fun and getting fit, you’re feeling lower and lower and burning out.
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The simple layout of the book
- By Amazon Customer on 12-04-24
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Secure Love
- Create a Relationship That Lasts a Lifetime
- By: Julie Menanno
- Narrated by: Julie Menanno
- Length: 10 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
What does a healthy relationship look like? A good question, in theory, but couple’s therapist Julie Menanno wants you to consider: what does a securely attached relationship feel like? The answer to this question is the ultimate goal in Secure Love, an “incredibly wise and helpful guide” (Jen Sincero, New York Times bestselling author of You Are a Badass) to understanding secure attachment in adult relationships.
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I can fix myself.
- By Shirley on 09-27-24
By: Julie Menanno
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Master Your Attachment Style
- Learn How to Build Healthy & Long-Lasting Relationships
- By: Scott A. Young
- Narrated by: Adam El Hagar
- Length: 3 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It’s completely normal to go through ups and downs. Yet, your relationships with others shouldn’t be something that causes you constant stress, anxiety, or worry. Profound relationships are vital to your mental and emotional well-being. A life filled with beautiful and long-lasting relationships is something you deserve, and it’s time you go out and create this for yourself!
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Insightful. Straight forward
- By Amazon Customer on 09-18-24
By: Scott A. Young
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Anxious Attachment Recovery and Healing
- Letting Go of Anxiety and Overthinking in Relationships and Becoming More Secure about You and the One You Love
- By: Dreamstorm Publications
- Narrated by: Graham Wolfe
- Length: 3 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In 'Anxious Attachment Recovery and Healing,' you’ll discover a transformative journey towards greater emotional well-being and secure, loving relationships. This comprehensive guide offers insights, strategies, and practical exercises to help you overcome anxiety and overthinking in your relationships and develop a more secure sense of self and connection with your loved ones.
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Very helpful
- By Gabriel B. on 05-15-24
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How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind
- Forget the Fairy Tale and Get Real
- By: Todd Baratz LMHC
- Narrated by: Vikas Adam
- Length: 6 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Modern love is a mess and life is (spoiler alert!) very hard. Whether you’re in a committed relationship or on the apps, buckle up, there’s a lot to unlearn. How to Love Someone Without Losing Your Mind is your guide to sanity in a culture gone mad. Psychotherapist and sex therapist Todd Baratz blends sharp humor with raw insight as he challenges us to break every rule about love. It’s time to move beyond the relentless pursuit of the perfect partner, to challenge the stigma against neediness, and to rethink our obsession with diagnosing common challenges as disorders.
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Full of wisdom, incredibly well narrated
- By Miguel Lourenco on 07-23-24
By: Todd Baratz LMHC
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Attached
- The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
- By: Amir Levine, Rachel Heller
- Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
We already rely on science to tell us what to eat, when to exercise, and how long to sleep. Why not use science to help us improve our relationships? In this revolutionary book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller scientifically explain why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle.
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Good book - just not a good one for Audible
- By Mark on 02-01-20
By: Amir Levine, and others
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Avoidant
- How to Love (or Leave) a Dismissive Partner
- By: Jeb Kinnison
- Narrated by: Joe Farinacci
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
People in relationships with avoidants struggle with their lack of responsiveness and inability to tolerate real intimacy. Relationships between an avoidant and a partner of another attachment type are the largest group of unhappy relationships, and people who love their partners and who may have started families and had children with an avoidant will work very hard to try to make their relationships work better, out of love for their partner and children as well as their own happiness.
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Derogatory towards woman/outdated/ female shaming
- By Stacy Lee on 05-12-18
By: Jeb Kinnison
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Love Me, Don't Leave Me
- Overcoming Fear of Abandonment and Building Lasting, Loving Relationships
- By: Michelle Skeen PsyD
- Narrated by: Karyn O'Bryant
- Length: 5 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
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Performance
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Story
Everyone thrives on love, comfort, and the safety of family, friends, and community. But if you are denied these basic comforts early in life through a lack of physical affection or emotional bonding, you may develop intense fears of abandonment that can last well into adulthood - fears so powerful that they can actually cause you to push people away. If you suffer from fears of abandonment, you may have underlying feelings of anger, shame, fear, anxiety, depression, and grief.
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30% is in workbook format, not ideal for reading
- By Karen Y Lin on 03-14-18
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Anxious Attachment Avoidant Love Collection
- Overcome Attachment Issues, Reduce Relationship Anxiety, and Connect with an Avoidant Partner as You Journey Towards Secure Attachment
- By: Krista Cantell
- Narrated by: Jennifer Perez
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ever feel like you're walking on eggshells in your relationship, feeling worried your partner might lose interest or even leave you? If constantly waiting for your love interest to text you or feeling uneasy when your partner's not around sounds familiar, you might be dealing with anxious attachment. And if your partner leans towards avoidant attachment, brace yourself – these triggers can become overwhelming. But fear not; understanding these dynamics is the first step to finding peace and connection in your relationship.
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An Empathetic Resource for Relationship Growth
- By DarrellDarrell on 11-03-24
By: Krista Cantell
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Healing Your Lost Inner Child
- How to Stop Impulsive Reactions, Set Healthy Boundaries and Embrace an Authentic Life
- By: Robert Jackman
- Narrated by: Randy Scott
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Most people don't realize how much unresolved emotional pain they carry around. They don't know why they always feel depressed, anxious, victimized, or disappointed. They wonder why they keep making the same self-sabotaging impulsive decisions. These patterns often stem from their lost inner child, which carries a false narrative that has been on repeat since childhood.
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Excellent book for healing your inner child
- By Stefan Pagacik on 11-09-21
By: Robert Jackman
What listeners say about The Anxious Hearts Guide
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- Jessie Ramon Jr
- 04-07-24
Life changing
Thank you for taking the time to write this. As an avoidant, I read/purchased this as a gift to my now ex partner whom I love & miss dearly. I hope this book provides her with the necessary tools/skills to grow, heal and love again. I now have my own work to do and look forward to your next book.
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- Anonymous User
- 07-09-24
Remarkable relatable
From the first chapters, where one can immediately identify with almost all characteristics of an anxious attacher, internal work starts getting done. We start identifying patterns that, instead of helping ourselves and partners, we create a snowball of inappropriate and unsettling emotions. This book helped putting myself in front of a mirror and making it possible to see what others can receive from me. It helped understand the need and desire to grow as an individual and as a human being in general.
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- Chris R
- 12-30-22
wonderfully written and read
I feel as though my friend and I just had a productive 5 hour chat.
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1 person found this helpful
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- linz
- 05-07-24
Encouraging support for anxious attachment
What I loved most about this book was the positive encouragement throughout. Words of understanding and support for what you may or may not feel. My outlook just feels a little less anxious. I have a lot of work to do to heal, however this book is a huge stepping stone in the right direction! Lots of guidance, ideas and manageable actions to take. Thank you!
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- Rob
- 05-07-24
Jam packed with helpful advice
I did not know how much I needed this book before listening to or even finishing it. Not only is it full of practicable measures to take, I had many aha moments about my 33-year marriage that helped me view my spouse in a more favorable light that I was unable to previously. Now to repeat listening. Thank you, Rikki!
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- Amazon Customer
- 10-05-24
Brilliant, direct, and compassionate
I often rate books with stars but rarely write comments. If you’re struggling in relationships and feel the audio or typeset samples resonate in any way, do yourself a favor and get this book. You’ll discover ways you didn’t know you needed to change. You’ll drastically improve your relationships. And you’ll finally start loving yourself for who you are.
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- Anonymous User
- 12-30-22
Solid Guidance - Thank you
I had found and followed Rikki’s IG account a couple of months ago - her content topic is important to me. Recorded and live feeds, podcasts, and simple vulnerable posts are great prefaces to this book - if you value those, you will also gain from her book. Rikki Cloos has absorbed, distilled and blended so much helpful, expert insight on this topic, such as the Gottmans, and presents it in a more approachable less academic voice - which for this subject matter, I appreciate hearing the sincerity from my “sister” who has been through it, and not as much the data from my “professor”.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Elisabeth Louise Mizner
- 03-01-24
Everything makes more sense now!
I really enjoyed the book. It helped me understand myself on a much deeper level thanks for putting it today and reading it yourself it's always so nice listening to the author read their own books
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- Sheree
- 01-07-23
Wow! This information will help me and I’ve been married for 33 years!
I like this book because it’s concise and short. I have been married in a second marriage for 33 years. We are currently at a crossroads that should’ve been resolved years ago and now I have new hope! Thank you Rikki...
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- Sarah B Flynn
- 02-04-23
Gentle & practical & relatable
Such an easy listen! The author is reading and it’s so well written. Practical, gentle, and relatable! Definitely learned some life changing information about myself and changing attachment style patterns! Realizing my role and seeing change.
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