
The Power of Discord
Why the Ups and Downs of Relationships Are the Secret to Building Intimacy, Resilience, and Trust
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Narrated by:
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Dan Woren
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Betsy Foldes Meiman
About this listen
This "profoundly wise" look at how to foster connections, attachment, and resiliency explains why working through discord is the key to better relationships. (Sue Johnson, best-selling author of Hold Me Tight)
You might think that perfect harmony is the defining characteristic of healthy relationships, but the truth is that human interactions are messy, complicated, and confusing. And according to renowned psychologist Ed Tronick and pediatrician Claudia Gold, that is not only okay, it is actually crucial to our social and emotional development. In The Power of Discord they show how working through the inevitable dissonance of human connection is the path to better relationships with romantic partners, family, friends, and colleagues.
Dr. Tronick was one of the first researchers to show that babies are profoundly affected by their parents' emotions and behavior via "The Still-Face Experiment". His work, which brought about a foundational shift in our understanding of human development, shows that our highly evolved sense of self makes us separate, yet our survival depends on connection. And so we approximate, iteratively learning about one another's desires and intentions, and gaining confidence in the process as we correct the mistakes and misunderstandings that arise.
Working through the volley of mismatch and repair in everyday life helps us form deep, lasting, trusting relationships, resilience in times of stress and trauma, and a solid sense of self in the world. Drawing on Dr. Tronick's research and Dr. Gold's clinical experience, The Power of Discord is a refreshing and original look at our ability to relate to others and to ourselves.
©2020 Ed Tronick, PhD and Claudia M. Gold, MD (P)2020 Little, Brown & CompanyListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"Lively and riveting...Human connections have the power to heal by engaging us in a new set of moment-to- moment mismatches...as long as we are open to repair and reconnect." (Bessel van der Kolk, MD, author of The Body Keeps the Score)
"A brilliant overview of our contemporary relational landscape that argues that what people - both children and adults - need most is the messiness of real relationships, with their conflicts, partial resolutions, and imperfect efforts at repair. In trying to make these things work, we practice attention, connection, and listening. We practice our humanity. We learn to put technology in its place. A book for thinking and for practical action. A must-read." (Sherry Turkle, author of Alone Together: Why We Expect More from Technology)
"In this fabulous book, which everyone must own, Ed Tronick and Claudia Gold give all of us a scientifically-based compass for negotiating the messiness of social interaction. Rather than searching for perfection, in this book they teach us that it is the messiness and the mistakes we inevitably make as parents, friends, and lovers, and the repair of our mistakes that really matters. For in repair we 'co-create a new meaning', and relationships thrive and proceed, full of life and good enough. Get this book!" (John Gottman, author of Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work)
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By: Scott Gerber, and others
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The Hidden World of the Fox
- By: Adele Brand
- Narrated by: Jane McDowell
- Length: 5 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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The fox. For thousands of years, myth and folklore have celebrated its cunning intelligence. Today, the red fox is the nature’s most populous carnivore, its dancing orange tail a common sight in backyards. Yet, who is this wild neighbor, truly? How do we negotiate this uneasy new chapter of an ancient relationship? Join British ecologist Adele Brand on a journey to discover the surprising secrets of the fabled fox, the familiar yet enigmatic creature that has adapted to the human world with astonishing - some say, unsettling - success.
By: Adele Brand
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The Longevity Book
- The Science of Aging, the Biology of Strength, and the Privilege of Time
- By: Cameron Diaz
- Narrated by: Cameron Diaz, Sandy Rustin
- Length: 7 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Cameron Diaz follows up her number-one New York Times best seller, The Body Book, with a personal, practical, and authoritative guide that examines the art and science of growing older and offers concrete steps women can take to create abundant health and resilience as they age.
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Boring. Nothing new here<br />
- By Silke on 04-07-16
By: Cameron Diaz
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Bad Motherf--ker
- The Life and Movies of Samuel L. Jackson, the Coolest Man in Hollywood
- By: Gavin Edwards
- Narrated by: Phil LaMarr
- Length: 11 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Samuel L. Jackson’s embodiment of cool isn’t just inspirational - it’s important. Bad Motherf--ker lays out how his attitude intersects with his identity as a Black man, why being cool matters in the modern world, and how Jackson can guide us through the current cultural moment in which everyone is losing their cool. Edwards details Jackson’s fascinating personal history, from stuttering bookworm to gunrunning revolutionary to freebasing addict to A-list movie star.
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Made me hungrier
- By RCH on 07-27-22
By: Gavin Edwards
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You're Not the Problem
- The Impact of Narcissism and Emotional Abuse and How to Heal
- By: Helen Villiers, Katie McKenna
- Narrated by: Helen Villiers, Katie McKenna
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Many emotionally abusive behaviors from parent to child have become socially acceptable because of the way we repeat things our parents said and did, things passed down from generation to generation that persist today. You're Not the Problem enables us to recognize these behaviors and realize the profound impact they have had, and still have, and to see the patterns they form in our relationships with parents, partners and friends. It also shows us how to heal on a personal level but also on a societal level.
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Life changing
- By Amazon Customer on 08-16-24
By: Helen Villiers, and others
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This Idea Is Brilliant
- Lost, Overlooked, and Underappreciated Scientific Concepts Everyone Should Know
- By: John Brockman
- Narrated by: Cassandra Campbell, Charles Constant
- Length: 16 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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As science informs public policy, decision making, and so many aspects of our everyday lives, a scientifically literate society is crucial. In that spirit, Edge.org publisher and author of Know This, John Brockman, asks 206 of the world's most brilliant minds the 2017 Edge Question: What scientific term or concept ought to be more widely known?
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Condensed Brilliance in Digestable Chunks
- By Andrew on 02-15-18
By: John Brockman
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Little Things
- Why You Really Should Sweat the Small Stuff
- By: Andy Andrews
- Narrated by: Andy Andrews
- Length: 4 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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The Little Things embodies Andy Andrews' own approach to life and work, detailing for the first time some of the exclusive material that he uses to teach and coach some of the most successful corporations, teams, and individuals around the world. In his unique humorous style, Andy shows how people succeed by actually going against the modern adage "don't sweat the small stuff". By contrast, Andy proves that it is in concentrating on the smaller things that we add value and margin.
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A homerun for Andy!!
- By JustDisGuy on 03-11-17
By: Andy Andrews
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Jellyfish Age Backwards
- Nature's Secrets to Longevity
- By: Nicklas Brendborg
- Narrated by: Joe Leat
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Recent advances in medicine and technology have expanded our understanding of aging across the animal kingdom, and our own timeless quest for the fountain of youth. Yet, despite modern humans living longer today than ever before, the public’s understanding of what is possible is limited to our species—until now. In this spunky, effervescent debut, the key to immortality is revealed to be a superpower within reach.
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Interesting for the non-scientist
- By Andrew Lim on 03-31-23
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The Traveler's Summit
- By: Andy Andrews
- Narrated by: Andy Andrews
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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This is humanity’s last chance. Centuries of greed, pride, and hate have sent humankind hurtling toward disaster, far from our original purpose. There is only one solution that can reset the compass and right the ship, and that answer is only two words. With time running out, it’s up to David Ponder and a cast of history’s best and brightest minds to uncover this solution before it is too late. The catch? They are allowed only five tries to solve the ominous challenge.
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AMAZING!! BEST BOOK SO FAR!
- By Amazon Customer on 08-16-18
By: Andy Andrews
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Accountable
- The Rise of Citizen Capitalism
- By: Michael O'Leary, Warren Valdmanis
- Narrated by: Joe Knezevich
- Length: 9 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Corporations are broken, reflecting no purpose deeper than profit. But the tools we are relying on to fix them - corporate social responsibility, divestment, impact investing, and government control - risk making our problems worse. With lively storytelling and careful analysis, O’Leary and Valdmanis cut through the tired dogma of current economic thinking to reveal a hopeful truth: If we can make our corporations accountable to a deeper purpose, we can make capitalism both prosperous and good.
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mandatory reading
- By joseph on 02-01-21
By: Michael O'Leary, and others
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Get Out of Your Own Way
- How to Overcome Any Obstacle in Your Life
- By: Larry Winget
- Narrated by: Larry Winget
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Original Recording
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You think you know what you want in life. You've tried to achieve those things. But if you still don't have them, the culprit may be closer than you think. In this perspective-altering program, the world-renowned Pitbull of Personal Development(tm), Larry Winget, exposes the things you are doing right now to unknowingly prevent your own success in the most important areas of your life.
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Was just OK
- By KatieReviewsStuff on 01-30-17
By: Larry Winget
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Traumatized
- Identify, Understand, and Cope with PTSD and Emotional Stress
- By: Kati Morton LMFT
- Narrated by: Kati Morton LMFT
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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We hear the terms trauma and PTSD more and more. Yet many people still believe that trauma can only result from experiences that are particularly extreme. But trauma is an emotional response that can stem from a wide variety of upsetting experiences, leaving us feeling anxious, weighed down by negative emotions or memories, or feeling like we lack security.
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trauna
- By kathrin johnson on 12-07-22
By: Kati Morton LMFT
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The F*ck It Diet
- Eating Should Be Easy
- By: Caroline Dooner
- Narrated by: Caroline Dooner
- Length: 7 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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From comedian and ex-diet junkie Caroline Dooner, an inspirational guide that will help you stop dieting, reboot your relationship with food, and regain your personal power. Our bodies are hardwired against dieting. But each time our diets fail, instead of considering that maybe our ridiculously low-carb diet is the problem, we wonder what’s wrong with us.
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I cannot believe this actually got published
- By w49859845 on 03-02-20
By: Caroline Dooner
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A Question of Power
- Electricity and the Wealth of Nations
- By: Robert Bryce
- Narrated by: Robert Bryce
- Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Global demand for power is doubling every two decades, but electricity remains one of the most difficult forms of energy to supply and do so reliably. Today, some three billion people live in places where per-capita electricity use is less than what's used by an average American refrigerator. How we close the colossal gap between the electricity rich and the electricity poor will determine our success in addressing issues like women's rights, inequality, and climate change.
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Not the complete story
- By John on 08-11-20
By: Robert Bryce
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The Language Game
- How Improvisation Created Language and Changed the World
- By: Morten H. Christiansen, Nick Chater
- Narrated by: Peter Noble
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Language is perhaps humanity’s most astonishing capacity - and one that remains poorly understood. In The Language Game, cognitive scientists Morten H. Christiansen and Nick Chater show us where generations of scientists seeking the rules of language got it wrong. Language isn’t about hardwired grammars but about near-total freedom, something like a game of charades, with the only requirement being a desire to understand and be understood.
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Good
- By Bruce R on 03-12-22
By: Morten H. Christiansen, and others
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The Wellness Trap
- Break Free from Diet Culture, Disinformation, and Dubious Diagnoses, and Find Your True Well-Being
- By: Christy Harrison
- Narrated by: Christy Harrison
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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“It's not a diet, it's a lifestyle.” You've probably heard this phrase from any number of people in the wellness space. But as Christy Harrison reveals in her latest book, wellness culture promotes a standard of health that is often both unattainable and deeply harmful. The Wellness Trap delves into the persistent, systemic problems with that industry, offering insight into its troubling pattern of cultural appropriation and its destructive views on mental health, and shedding light on how a growing distrust of conventional medicine has led ordinary people to turn their backs on science.
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Missed the Mark
- By Kelly on 05-04-23
By: Christy Harrison
I feel very grateful to the authors for presenting this information in such a thoughtful, cohesive and engaging book.
Where to begin? This book has upended my understanding of relationships
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Invaluable Information and Message
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A very important book
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A must read for those who have kids or want a healthy relationships!
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Helpful
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Highly recommend for pediatric occupational therapists to listen to!
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Helpful book clinically and personally
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