When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us Audiobook By Jane Adams cover art

When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us

Letting Go of Their Problems, Loving Them Anyway, and Getting on with Our Lives

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When Our Grown Kids Disappoint Us

By: Jane Adams
Narrated by: Jane Adams
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How do today's parents cope when the dreams we had for our children clash with reality? What can we do for our 20- and even 30-somethings who can't seem to grow up? Who can we turn to when the kids aren't all right and we, their parents, are frightened, frustrated, resentful, embarrassed, and especially, disappointed? In this groundbreaking book, a social psychologist who's been chronicling the lives of American families for over two decades confronts our deepest concerns when our grown kids have failed to thrive. She listens to a generation that "did everything right" and expected its children to grow into happy, healthy, successful adults. But they haven't, at least not yet - and meanwhile, we're letting their problems threaten our health, marriages, security, freedom, careers, retirement, and other family relationships.

With warmth, empathy, and perspective, Dr. Adams offers a positive, life-affirming message to parents who are still trying to "fix" their adult children - Stop! She shows us how to separate from their problems without separating from them, and how to be a positive force in their lives while getting on with our own.

©2003 Jane Adams (P)2016 Tantor
Emotions Parenting & Families Parents & Adult Children Personal Development Health Mental Health Adult Children

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Relatable Personal Stories • Helpful Parental Guidance • Validating Shared Experiences • Practical Detachment Principles
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Too many experiences overwhelmed me. However the last 3 chapters were inspiring enough to catch my full attention.

The substance lies on the last 3 chapters

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Loved how personal this book was. From drug using children to adult children in jail/in trouble

I thought I was the only one

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The story of parents help realize we are not alone in this painful and devastating journey.

The concept of detachment which is helpful for parents with children who disappoint them.

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I have been struggling to move on from my adult son for almost a decade and this book reinforced the decisions I am making are positive and I can finally move forward without the guilt.

The advise in this book has been monumental for me to hear and know that my story isnt unique, its a text book story for the parents of addicts and we have tomlet go and move on.

great book.

Spot On!

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I listened to it all the way through...will listen again...I took in some keynotes...I realized I stopped my daughter now 51 from growing up...always bailing her out...not anymore...I'm done hurting...my other two son's I've called it quits with them...no more abuse..what hurts is not seeing my granddaughters...

helpful

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Listened to it 3 times. Need more details on detachment though. How to do that.

Great book

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Many of us are desperate for help. I hoped I’d find hidden tricks. This book is great for parents who have not done much prior research.

Stating the obvious

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I wish I bought this book before having kids so that I woukd have known what to expect and be better prepared for it. just the way the author could explain the very challenges I face(albeit on a much minor scale) definitely helped to ease and understand some of the frustration that a parent can face with adult children. Jane, everything in this book is useful, if not for ourself, but for some other adult child who is just not thriving. The book was such a great comfort to the issues I faced, that I went back over them again and again. I feel much better equipped now.What a relief to know I wasn't alone, an even greater relief that our issues can be remedied. Thanks Jane

Purposeful Parenting

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I was hoping for more suggestions or guidence on teaching. when to say no to enabling verses yes to helping.

i struggled to finish

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The basic messages are 1. accept that your kids’ choices are not your fault, 2. Learn to detach, 3. Get on with your own life. I did journal a good quote from this book... “now is the only time I can make any difference”, so at least I got that. This audiobook was difficult to listen to, the author narrates herself, and she does not have a good narration voice. I’m glad the book was as short as it was, otherwise I would have had a hard time finishing it.

Was hoping for more

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