When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart
Coping with Mental Illness, Substance Abuse, and the Problems that Tear Families Apart
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Narrated by:
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Rich Miller
About this listen
Behind nearly every adult who is accused of a crime, becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, or who is severely mentally ill and acting out in public, there is usually at least one extremely stressed-out parent. This parent may initially react with the bad news of their adult child behaving badly with, "Oh no!" followed by, "How can I help to fix this?" A very common third reaction is the thought, "Where did I go wrong - was it something I said or did, or that I failed to do when my child was growing up that caused these issues? Is this really somehow all my fault?"
These parents then open their homes, their pocketbooks, their hearts, and their futures to "saving" their adult child - who may go on to leave them financially and emotionally broken. Sometimes these families also raise the children their adult children leave behind: 1.6 million grandparents in the US are in this situation.
This helpful book presents families with quotations and scenarios from real suffering parents (who are not identified), practical advice, and tested strategies for coping. It also discusses the fact that parents of adult children may themselves need therapy and medications, especially antidepressants. The book is written in a clear, reassuring manner by Dr. Joel L. Young, medical director of the Rochester Center for Behavioral Medicine.
©2013 Joel L. Young, MD and Christine Adamec (P)2020 TantorListeners also enjoyed...
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-
Story
A tough-love guide to coping with dysfunctional adult children, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children will empower families by offering hope and healing through S.A.N.I.T.Y. - a six-step program to help parents regain control in their homes and in their lives.
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Way too Religious, thinking about returning it.
- By Mickerj on 10-20-16
By: Allison Bottke
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When Your Child Divorces You.....Estrangement
- From Absalom to the Prodigal Son
- By: Jean Lash
- Narrated by: Virtual Voice
- Length: 40 mins
- Unabridged
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A 43 page book written to encourage the estranged parent. The Bible speaks at length of two kinds of estrangement. Two different paths that got there, and two different paths to get out. Both David and the Prodigal Father faced estrangement from their adult child. Support, advice, and encouragement "in the waiting". Written by an estranged mother.
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Compassion, understanding, non judge mental, heart felt
- By Marie on 06-17-24
By: Jean Lash
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Creating Boundaries with Your Adult Children
- How to Love, Trust, and Find Peace Together (9-Step Empowered Boundaries for Healthy Relationships)
- By: David P. Mitchell
- Narrated by: Steve King
- Length: 3 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Create a healthy relationship with your adult child through clear boundaries and expectations. As your child becomes a young adult, your role must evolve to meet their ongoing, changing needs. But what exactly are these new needs and how have they changed? How can you support them fully while still protecting yourself? What are the rules when they are living in the family home?
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Clarity of presentation.
- By Anonymous User on 04-05-24
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Fault Lines
- Fractured Families and How to Mend Them
- By: Karl Pillemer Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Estrangement from a family member is one of the most painful life experiences. It is devastating not only to the individuals directly involved - collateral damage can extend upward, downward, and across generations. More than 65 million Americans suffer such rifts, yet little guidance exists on how to cope with and overcome them. In this book, Karl Pillemer combines the advice of people who have successfully reconciled with powerful insights from social science research. The result is a unique guide to mending fractured families.
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Estrangement can be avoided and healed. There’s hope.
- By Augusta Olaore on 01-11-24
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When Your Daughter Has BPD
- Essential Skills to Help Families Manage Borderline Personality Disorder
- By: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
- Narrated by: Terrence Bayes
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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If you have a daughter with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you may feel frustration, shame, and your family may be at the breaking point dealing with angry outbursts, threats, and constant emergencies. You may even feel guilty for not enjoying spending time with your child - but how can you when her behavior is abusive toward you and the rest of your family? You need solid skills you can use now to help your daughter and hold your family together.
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Most helpful book on the subject yet
- By kscoco on 03-16-21
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How to Really Love Your Adult Child
- Building a Healthy Relationship in a Changing World
- By: Ross Campbell, Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Dan Robertson
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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More than 10 years after Parenting Your Adult Child was published, much has changed—including young adults themselves, as well as their parents. Economic upheavals, challenges to traditional values and beliefs, the phenomenon of over-involved "helicopter parenting"—all make relating to grown children more difficult than ever. Yet at the same time, being a parent of an adult child can bring great rewards.
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Helped to bring clarity and direction
- By J.T. on 01-03-24
By: Ross Campbell, and others
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The Good Daughter Syndrome
- Help for Empathic Daughters of Narcissistic, Borderline, or Difficult Mothers Trapped in the Role of the Good Daughter
- By: Katherine K Fabrizio
- Narrated by: Colleen Weaver
- Length: 10 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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You love your mother, but she drives you crazy. She controls, criticizes, and butts into your life constantly. Then when you try and set boundaries, the pushback and resulting guilt are so bad you tell yourself...it's just not worth it. Is your mother narcissistic, borderline, or just plain difficult? Are you empathetic, sensitive, and kind? If so, chances are you have fallen into one or all of the hidden psychological traps that constitute the Good Daughter Syndrome.
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Decent primer if your mom is still in your life
- By Twin of Eyegone on 07-01-24
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Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome
- Breaking the Ties That Bind
- By: Amy J. L. Baker PhD
- Narrated by: Madeleine Dauer
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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An examination of adults who have been manipulated by divorcing parents. Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) occurs when divorcing parents use children as pawns, trying to turn the child against the other parent. This book examines the impact of PAS on adults and offers strategies and hope for dealing with the long-term effects.
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I wish I knew when I was younger.
- By Adam A. on 06-17-21
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Don't Let Your Kids Kill You
- A Guide for Parents of Drug and Alcohol Addicted Children
- By: Charles Rubin
- Narrated by: Tom Zingarelli
- Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Don't Let Your Kids Kill You is a landmark work that dares to focus on the plight of the confused, distressed parent and not the erring child. It sets aside any preconceived ideas that parents are to blame for what is essentially a full-blown global crisis. Drawing on interviews with parents who have survived the heartbreak of kids on drugs, combined with his own experience, Charles Rubin provides practical advice on how parents can help themselves and their families by first attending to their own needs.
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Must read if kids are in deep.
- By nkay on 04-04-18
By: Charles Rubin
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When Parents Hurt
- Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don't Get Along
- By: Joshua Coleman PhD
- Narrated by: Paul Boehmer
- Length: 8 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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This unique book supports parents who are struggling with the heartache of having a teenager or an adult child who is troubled, angry, or distant. Such rifts can cause unspeakable sorrow that parents too often must bear alone. Psychologist and parent Joshua Coleman, PhD, offers insight, empathy, and perspective to those who have lost the opportunity to be the parents they desperately wanted to be and who are mourning the loss of a harmonious relationship with their child.
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Not worth tour time...
- By TMT on 12-12-16
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The Not Good Enough Mother
- By: Sharon Lamb
- Narrated by: Rosemary Benson
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Psychologist and expert witness Dr. Sharon Lamb evaluates parents, particularly in high-stakes cases concerning the termination of parental rights. The conclusions she reaches can mean that some children are returned home from foster homes. Others are freed for adoption. Well-trained, Lamb generally can decide what's in the best interests of the child. But when her son's struggle with opioid addiction comes to light, she starts to doubt her right to make judgments about other mothers.
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I loved the honesty in this book
- By Kristine Harrell on 12-05-20
By: Sharon Lamb
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Adult Children
- The Secrets of Dysfunctional Families
- By: Linda Friel, John Friel
- Narrated by: Derek Perkins
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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It is estimated that as many as 34 million people grew up in alcoholic homes. But what about the rest of us? What about families that had no alcoholism, but did have perfectionism, workaholism, compulsive overeating, intimacy problems, depression, problems in expressing feelings, plus all the other personality traits that can produce a family system much like an alcoholic one? Countless millions of us struggle with these kinds of dysfunctions every day, and until very recently we struggled alone.
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An unbelievable book that will change your life
- By Michael on 01-14-14
By: Linda Friel, and others
What listeners say about When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Pamela J Hoyes
- 10-03-23
Glad I stumbled upon this…
I’m glad I stumbled upon this book. I found it helpful and informative. I recommend it to others.
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- Nat B.
- 11-15-22
Highly Recommended! You need this book!
I recommend this book to anyone dealing with any of these topics directly or indirectly. It's been a few months since I read it but I had to come back and leave a review because it was so good and helped me through really tough times. I grately appreciate how the authors tied in the medical aspect with different real & tough examples. I didn't need fluff. I needed to try to make sense of things. I can only imagine that this book took a long time to write as there is so much substance.
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- Anonymous User
- 12-01-22
An important resource for parents struggling
As a mother of five nearly adult children and a parent coach who works specifically with the parents of young adults, this book is a valuable resource for parents who are struggling with their children who have serious problems such as substance abuse, mental health, and/or personality disorders.
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- L. Nowicki
- 09-07-22
Absorbing
Lots of good information. Enhanced my understanding of the problems and available treatment and response options .
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- Di
- 05-15-23
I’m reading it again. I learned from this what was wrong.
I didn’t understand what was wrong with my child until he explained the diagnosis of ADHD and daily alcohol can cause violence, and acting in such hurtful, unlawful, and awful ways, even to family with no care about us, and lies and blaming to cover it up.
It doesn’t fix the problem, but I learned so much! I like that he breaks it down because every chapters isn’t needed for everyone.
His question, “Do you remember what you did to your child….?” Then his response to that question might help you realize, it’s not you.
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- Terrip
- 03-14-21
looking at my broken heart.
I was hoping for a magical answer on how to fix a broken child and mend my broken heart 💔 Making tough choices is sometimes the only solution.
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- Robert Davila
- 04-30-23
Great Resource for information on Mental Health
From page one the author takes you on a journey of exploration into the area of
mental health. This is a great book for anyone who has had a child or knows someone whose child suffers from mental illness. It is honest and directly to the point.
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