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Failure to Launch
Why Your Twentysomething Hasn't Grown Up...and What to Do About It
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Narrated by:
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Stephen Graybill
About this listen
From an expert in adolescent psychology comes a groundbreaking, timely, and necessary guide for parents of the 2.2 million young adults in America who are struggling to find their way in the world.
In Dr. Mark McConville's decades of experience as a family clinical psychologist, perhaps no problem has been more fraught than that of young adults who fail to successfully transition from adolescence into adulthood. These kids - technically adults - just can't get it together: They can't hold a job, they struggle to develop meaningful relationships, and they often end up back in their parents' spare bedroom or on the couch. In fact, studies show that one in four Americans aged 25 to 34 neither work nor attend school, and it's a problem that spans all socioeconomic and geographic boundaries.
McConville investigates the root causes of this problem: Why are modern kids "failing to launch" in ever-increasing numbers? The key, McConville has found, is that they are struggling with three critical skills that are necessary to make the transition from childhood to adulthood - finding a sense of purpose, developing administrative responsibility, and cultivating interdependence. In Failure to Launch, McConville breaks these down into achievable, accessible goals and offers a practical guide for the whole family, to help parents instill those skills in their young adults - and to get their kids into the real world, ready to start their lives.
©2020 Mark McConville (P)2020 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
"McConville's style is welcoming, and his advice is reassuring. Parents facing these challenges (and there are plenty) will snap this up." (Booklist)
"Mark McConville offers a guilt-free look at why your kid is failing to launch, and explains how to tweak your parent-child interactions so that your kid becomes motivated to slide into the driver's seat of their own life. Empathetic, wise, and frank. Truly a must-read for parents of struggling twentysomethings." (Julie Lythcott-Haims, author of How to Raise an Adult)
"Growing up isn’t what it used to be, says psychologist Mark McConville - and because of that, parents need a new parenting tool-kit to help their kids transition into adulthood with strength, resilience, and grace. The good news: even young people who seem “stuck” can be taught the skills they need to thrive in this important stage of life. Failure to Launch is essential reading for any parent whose child is struggling to find his or her way in the world." (Lori Gottlieb, New York Times best-selling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone)
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- Unabridged
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In The Formula: Unlocking the Secrets to Raising Highly Successful Children, Harvard economist Ronald Ferguson, named in a New York Times profile as the foremost expert on the US educational "achievement gap," along with award-winning journalist Tatsha Robertson, reveal an intriguing blueprint for helping children from all types of backgrounds become successful adults.
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would recommend
- By Marcia on 02-25-20
By: Ronald F. Ferguson, and others
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Differently Wired
- Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World
- By: Deborah Reber
- Narrated by: Deborah Reber
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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The Self-Driven Child
- The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control over Their Lives
- By: William Stixrud PhD, Ned Johnson
- Narrated by: Kaleo Griffith
- Length: 11 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Many of us know we're putting too much pressure on our kids - and on ourselves - but how do we get off this crazy train? We want our children to succeed, to be their best, and to do their best, but what if they are not on board? A few years ago, Ned Johnson and Bill Stixrud started noticing the same problem from different angles: even high-performing kids were coming to them acutely stressed and lacking any real motivation. Many complained that they had no real control over their lives.
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Practical, wise, and well researched
- By Andrew on 07-12-18
By: William Stixrud PhD, and others
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The Available Parent
- Expert Advice for Raising Successful and Resilient Teens and Tweens
- By: John Duffy
- Narrated by: David Colacci
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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We have a tendency today to over-parent, micromanage, and underappreciate our adolescents. Dr. John Duffy's The Available Parent is a revolutionary approach to taking care of teens and tweens. The available parent of a teenager is open to discussion, offering advice and solutions but not insisting on them. He allows his child to make some mistakes, setting limits, primarily where health and safety are concerned. He never lectures - he is available but not controlling. He is neither cruel nor dismissive, ever....
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Parenting teens can be much less stressful!
- By Kathi on 06-12-14
By: John Duffy
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Women Who Think Too Much
- How to Break Free of Overthinking and Reclaim Your Life
- By: Susan Nolen-Hoeksema
- Narrated by: Sheryl Bernstein
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
- Abridged
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It's not a surprise that our fast-paced, overly analytical culture is pushing people - especially women - to spend countless hours thinking about negative ideas, feelings, and experiences. Renowned psychologist Dr. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema calls this "overthinking". Her groundbreaking research shows that an increasing number of women - more than half of those in her extensive study - are doing it too much and too often, hindering their ability to lead a satisfying life.
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Generic tools for overcoming overthinking
- By letlet on 01-09-19
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All the Rage
- Mothers, Fathers, and the Myth of Equal Partnership
- By: Darcy Lockman
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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The inequity of domestic life is one of the most profound and perplexing conundrums of our time. In an era of seemingly unprecedented feminist activism, enlightenment, and change, data shows that one area of gender inequality stubbornly remains: the unequal amount of parental work that falls on women, no matter their class or professional status.
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Must read for men
- By Brooks Rainey Pearson on 06-12-19
By: Darcy Lockman
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The Entitlement Trap
- How to Rescue Your Child with a New Family System of Choosing, Earning, and Ownership
- By: Richard Eyre, Linda Eyre
- Narrated by: Sandra Burr
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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New York Times–bestselling authors Richard and Linda Eyre have spent the last twenty-five years helping parents nurture strong, healthy families. Now they’ve synthesized their vast experience into an essential blueprint for instilling children with a sense of ownership, responsibility, and self-sufficiency. At the heart of their plan is a “Family Economy”, complete with a family bank, checkbooks for the kids, and a system of responsibilities that teaches children to earn money for the things they want.
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Best Parenting Book Ever!
- By Paul on 07-11-15
By: Richard Eyre, and others
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The Dolphin Way
- A Parent's Guide to Raising Healthy, Happy, and Motivated Kids - without Turning into a Tiger
- By: Shimi Kang
- Narrated by: Karen Saltus
- Length: 9 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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The Dolphin Way walks readers through Dr. Kang’s four-part method for cultivating self-motivation. The audiobook makes a powerful case that we are not forced to choose between being permissive or controlling. The third option—the option that will prepare our kids for success in a future that will require adaptability - is the dolphin way.
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Very easy way to understand complicated subject
- By Nhat on 11-05-18
By: Shimi Kang
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One and Only
- The Freedom of Having an Only Child, and the Joy of Being One
- By: Lauren Sandler
- Narrated by: Lauren Sandler
- Length: 6 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Journalist Lauren Sandler is an only child and the mother of one. After investigating what only children are really like and whether stopping at one child is an answer to reconciling motherhood and modernity, she learned a lot about herself - and a lot about our culture's assumptions. In this heartfelt work, Sandler legitimizes a discussion about the larger societal costs of having more than one.
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Data Driven
- By Meghan B on 01-11-22
By: Lauren Sandler
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The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness
- Five Steps to Help Kids Create and Sustain Lifelong Joy
- By: Edward M. Hallowell MD
- Narrated by: Pete Larkin
- Length: 8 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Edward M. Hallowell, MD, father of three and a clinical psychiatrist, has thought long and hard about what makes children feel good about themselves and the world they live in. Now, in The Childhood Roots of Adult Happiness, he shares his findings with all of us who care about children. We don't need statistical studies or complicated expert opinions to raise children. What we do need is love, wonder, and the confidence to trust our instincts.
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Love this book and will be listening again
- By Jenny on 09-15-22
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Social Justice Parenting
- How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-Racist, Justice-Minded Kids in an Unjust World
- By: Traci Baxley
- Narrated by: Traci Baxley
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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As a global pandemic shuttered schools across the country in 2020, parents found themselves thrust into the role of teacher — in more ways than one. Not only did they take on remote school supervision, but after the murder of George Floyd and the ensuing Black Lives Matter protests, many also grappled with the responsibility to teach their kids about social justice — with few resources to guide them.
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Inspiring, motivating, practical
- By Heather Janetzko on 03-18-24
By: Traci Baxley
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We need a fundamental shift in our values—a pivot in how we think, act, work, and connect. Despite what we’ve been told, the most critical mainspring of social change isn’t coalition building or problem analysis. It’s healing: deep, whole, and systemic, inside and out. Here, Shawn Ginwright, PhD, breaks down the common myths of social movements—a set of deeply ingrained beliefs that actually hold us back from healing and achieving sustainable systemic change.
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Loved! Perfect for the newly minted PhD student interested in social justice
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Biohack Your Brain
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General statements mentioned 1000 times elsewhere
- By Vlad on 06-10-22
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Win the Day
- 7 Daily Habits to Help You Stress Less & Accomplish More
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Too many people delay, downsize, or shrug off their dreams just because they don’t know where to start, but playing it safe doesn’t account for the massive cost of a life not fully lived. Win the Day is the jump-start you need to go after your goals, one day at a time.
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Mindset 🤔 is everything in 2021 🎯
- By Egbert Oostburg on 01-01-21
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What Do You Say?
- How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home
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- Narrated by: Ned Johnson
- Length: 8 hrs and 39 mins
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William Stixrud, PhD, and Ned Johnson have 60 years combined experience talking to kids one-on-one, and the most common question they get when out speaking to parents and educators is: What do you say? While many adults understand the importance and power of the philosophies behind the books that dominate the parenting bestseller list, parents are often left wondering how to put those concepts into action. Johnson and Stixrud show how to engage in respectful and effective dialogue, beginning with defining and demonstrating the basic principles of listening and speaking.
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Actionable Advice
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Remote, Inc.
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You can thrive and excel when you’re working remotely, if you adopt the mindset, habits, and tech tools of professionals who are even more productive outside the office: Learn to think like a “business of one", and that entrepreneurial mindset will transform your experience of remote work.
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Superb advise for a remote work life.
- By Kaye H. on 11-26-22
By: Robert C. Pozen, and others
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Brain Inflamed
- Uncovering the Hidden Causes of Anxiety, Depression, and Other Mood Disorders in Adolescents and Teens
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From renowned integrative family physician Dr. Kenneth Bock, a groundbreaking approach to understanding and treating mental health among adolescents and teens.
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Taking on the difficult cases
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By: Kenneth Bock MD
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The Four Pivots
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We need a fundamental shift in our values—a pivot in how we think, act, work, and connect. Despite what we’ve been told, the most critical mainspring of social change isn’t coalition building or problem analysis. It’s healing: deep, whole, and systemic, inside and out. Here, Shawn Ginwright, PhD, breaks down the common myths of social movements—a set of deeply ingrained beliefs that actually hold us back from healing and achieving sustainable systemic change.
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Loved! Perfect for the newly minted PhD student interested in social justice
- By Tracee M. Tomlinson on 09-23-24
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Biohack Your Brain
- How to Boost Cognitive Health, Performance & Power
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- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
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Your brain is the most essential organ in your body. The brain and spinal cord are intimately connected to every bodily system and organ, so when it is balanced everything in your body and mind will function more efficiently. It's vitally important to take proactive steps now, or you risk losing everything, including your ability to think clearly, be creative, remember details, solve problems and retain your memory.
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General statements mentioned 1000 times elsewhere
- By Vlad on 06-10-22
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Win the Day
- 7 Daily Habits to Help You Stress Less & Accomplish More
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Too many people delay, downsize, or shrug off their dreams just because they don’t know where to start, but playing it safe doesn’t account for the massive cost of a life not fully lived. Win the Day is the jump-start you need to go after your goals, one day at a time.
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Mindset 🤔 is everything in 2021 🎯
- By Egbert Oostburg on 01-01-21
By: Mark Batterson
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What Do You Say?
- How to Talk with Kids to Build Motivation, Stress Tolerance, and a Happy Home
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- Narrated by: Ned Johnson
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William Stixrud, PhD, and Ned Johnson have 60 years combined experience talking to kids one-on-one, and the most common question they get when out speaking to parents and educators is: What do you say? While many adults understand the importance and power of the philosophies behind the books that dominate the parenting bestseller list, parents are often left wondering how to put those concepts into action. Johnson and Stixrud show how to engage in respectful and effective dialogue, beginning with defining and demonstrating the basic principles of listening and speaking.
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Actionable Advice
- By elizabeth m holladay on 05-19-24
By: William Stixrud PhD, and others
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Remote, Inc.
- How to Thrive at Work...Wherever You Are
- By: Robert C. Pozen, Alexandra Samuel
- Narrated by: Teri Schnaubelt
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
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You can thrive and excel when you’re working remotely, if you adopt the mindset, habits, and tech tools of professionals who are even more productive outside the office: Learn to think like a “business of one", and that entrepreneurial mindset will transform your experience of remote work.
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Superb advise for a remote work life.
- By Kaye H. on 11-26-22
By: Robert C. Pozen, and others
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Brain Inflamed
- Uncovering the Hidden Causes of Anxiety, Depression, and Other Mood Disorders in Adolescents and Teens
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From renowned integrative family physician Dr. Kenneth Bock, a groundbreaking approach to understanding and treating mental health among adolescents and teens.
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Taking on the difficult cases
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Cultured
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These days, probiotic yogurt and other "gut-friendly" foods line supermarket shelves. But what's the best way to feed our all-important microbiome - and what is a microbiome, anyway? In this engaging book, science journalist Katherine Harmon Courage investigates these questions, presenting a deep dive into the ancient food traditions and the latest research for maintaining a healthy gut.
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More vegan propaganda. Skip it.
- By mottdog2002 on 09-18-19
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Undo It!
- How Simple Lifestyle Changes Can Reverse Most Chronic Diseases
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Fight cancer, diabetes, heart disease, weight gain, and even the aging process itself with one simple, scientifically proven plan to reverse disease - as well as prevent and reduce symptoms - from the world-renowned pioneer of lifestyle medicine.
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Surprisingly awful
- By Nicole K. on 03-22-19
By: Dean Ornish M.D., and others
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The Miracle Equation
- The Two Decisions That Move Your Biggest Goals from Possible, to Probable, to Inevitable
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Hal Elrod, motivational speaker and author of the best-selling book The Miracle Morning, shares his "miracle equation", the secret to unlocking happiness, success, and your full potential. With the Miracle Equation 30-Day Challenge to guide your way, you’ll create a step-by-step plan to actualize your miracles and become the person you need to be in order to succeed. No goal is out of reach!
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Grateful
- By Conrad Deas on 04-18-19
By: Hal Elrod
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The Power of Voice
- A Guide to Making Yourself Heard
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From a toddler's first words to professional public speaking, from a marriage proposal to asking for a raise, our voice is our most crucial instrument of expression. The world judges us by our voice. And yet there has been no authoritative guide to mastering its full capacity and expressing our true selves in every aspect of life, from relationships and family to work. Until now.
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An autobiography, not a useful guidebook.
- By Anonymouse on 10-08-21
By: Denise Woods
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The Resonance Effect
- How Frequency Specific Microcurrent Is Changing Medicine
- By: Carolyn McMakin, James L. Oschman - foreword
- Narrated by: Diana Gardiner
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The Resonance Effect is both the author's story of her inspirational journey of having the courage to find her true calling and an account of the development of a remarkable newly rediscovered treatment, frequency-specific microcurrent (FSM), that takes advantage of the body's ability to respond to frequencies in order to heal a number of chronic conditions.
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Frequencies for the Future!
- By Audrey Moorehead on 10-21-20
By: Carolyn McMakin, and others
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The Elements of Choice
- Why the Way We Decide Matters
- By: Eric J. Johnson
- Narrated by: Fred Sanders
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Performance
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Story
Plenty of books dwell on the faults in our decision-making or offer advice on how to make better choices. The Elements of Choice goes one step further and explains how we can design better end-to-end decision-making processes. Going well beyond the familiar concepts of nudges and defaults, Eric J. Johnson offers a comprehensive, systematic guide to creating effective choice architectures, the environments in which decisions are made.
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Learn what influences your choices
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It's Not Me, It's You
- Break the Blame Cycle. Relationship Better.
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Many of the clients who end up in our respective therapist offices thought they were doing relationships right—avoiding the white picket fence, focusing on careers and experiences over babies and legally-binding documents, choosing someone after they “found themselves” first. However, like clockwork, around their early to mid-thirties, these clients show up at our door. Why? For the first time, they realize that they dislike their relationship and are frustrated by their partner but know that another break-up won’t fix things.
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Best relationship & codependency book I’ve read in a long time
- By Elizabeth B. on 07-17-23
By: John Kim, and others
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Better, Not Perfect
- A Realist's Guide to Maximum Sustainable Goodness
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Negotiation and decision-making expert Max Bazerman explores how we can make more ethical choices by aspiring to be better, not perfect.
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Don’t waste your time
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Never Enough
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From a renowned behavioral neuroscientist and recovering addict, a rare pause-resisting work of science that draws on personal insights to reveal how drugs work, the dangerous hold they can take on the brain, and the surprising way to combat today's epidemic of addiction. Judith Grisel was a daily drug user and college dropout when she began to consider that her addiction might have a cure, one that she herself could perhaps discover by studying the brain. Now, after 25 years as a neuroscientist, she shares what she and other scientists have learned about addiction.
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The author ruined her own book with her narration
- By Milan on 05-03-19
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MAN*ifesting
- A Step-by-Step Guide to Attracting the Love That Is Meant for You
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- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Do you feel you're doing everything you can but wonder why you haven't found The One yet? Are you tired of being single? Are you ready to get unstuck, step into your power, and shed the residue of your past? If so, Jaime Bronstein, LCSW, named "The Number One Relationship Coach Transforming Lives" by Yahoo Finance, is here to show you that you're not alone; you can and will find the right love for you. MAN*ifesting will guide you on a journey from dating to destiny by teaching you exactly how to attract your soulmate.
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Amazing book for finding your soulmate !
- By tristan1505 on 01-08-24
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Grow Rich with the Power of Your Subconscious Mind
- By: Joseph Murphy
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Story
Millions have embraced Joseph Murphy's writings, including the phenomenal best seller The Power of Your Subconscious Mind, a beloved classic that sits alongside the works of Napoleon Hill, Dale Carnegie, and Norman Vincent Peale. This new collection, authorized by the Joseph Murphy Trust, focuses on prosperity - and the simple yet powerful ways we can focus our attention and beliefs to achieve life goals, obtain riches, and live the life of our dreams.
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Not Joseph Murphy- NOT recommended
- By Anonymous User on 06-21-21
By: Joseph Murphy
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Mindreader
- The New Science of Deciphering What People Really Think, What They Really Want, and Who They Really Are
- By: David J. Lieberman
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 6 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
What did your boss mean in that email? Is your mechanic stretching the truth? Whether you’re engaged in a casual conversation or a high-stakes negotiation, it’s critical to understand the subtext of a situation. But with so much interaction happening on screens—via email, texts, or video chat—we are losing the ability to interpret expressions and cues. Furthermore, since many are now savvy about the meaning of body language, it’s become even harder to discern someone’s true thoughts or intentions.
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Waste of a credit for common sense observations
- By Brendan on 08-30-22
What listeners say about Failure to Launch
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- TWW
- 07-22-21
Thank you.
I was looking for a way to make sense of things going on with my 21 year old son. This book was a Godsend. It clarified for me a lot of what he is going through and gave practical shifts for my husband and I to take that can make a difference. I recommend this book to anyone challenged to understand the difficult transition from adolescent to adulthood.
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- Heidi R
- 06-21-21
Thought provoking & informative
As a parent struggling to raise two sons who have had issues because of Type 1 Diabetes & Alcohol & drug addiction, this was an excellent book that focuses on the young adult years. Both points of view, ( the parent & the young adult) are explored clearly which is objective & helpful.
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1 person found this helpful
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- amazon buyer
- 10-10-23
Great book that shifted my thinking about my son.
I highly recommend this book. I found it a great turning point for me. I learned to understand my son better and it helped me to learn how to navigate the tricky relationship with my son and myself.
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- Tara
- 09-17-20
I'm so grateful to have found this book!!
I'm so grateful to have found this book!! I am already implementing the recommendations and am seeing progress.
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- Anonymous User
- 04-07-22
A great place to start
I was feeling some type of way about my son and him leaving the nest. I needed to hear what other parents may have dealt with. I’m glad that I didn’t move hastily. Good advice is given in this book. Thank you Mark.
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- P. Zimmerman
- 05-14-22
Good advice here
The doctor provided good advice. Be brave enough to follow it. That's the hard part.
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- James Duke
- 06-03-23
Do you know us??
Within the first three minutes of this book it felt as if I was speaking directly to Dr.Conville. His insight and advice into how best to help your “transitioners” is so clear & concise. I will listen to this again w/ my husband as we travel-I need this to become second nature. My only wish is that I had read it many years ago!!
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- Bugjce1
- 01-05-23
Thank you
Thank you for your insight! It should be read by both sides of the fence!
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- HB
- 02-16-25
exactly what parents need to know about adolescence and growing up.
This book offers a prescription of behaviors for parents to help their children grow into functioning adults. it gives me hope that I can improve my relationship with my 21 year old son who has been stalled for years despite therapy and nagging.
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Overall
- Brenda Cleveland
- 02-26-22
Great book for introducing problem.
I will continue with this study. My problem took years to develop and it will probably take years to resolve. I will be searching for more answers. This book sure changed my thinking about my "failure to launch" adult.
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