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Perfectly Hidden Depression
How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression
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Narrated by:
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Eleanor Caudill
About this listen
When your life looks perfect, but you're silently falling apart....
If you were raised to believe that painful emotions are a sign of weakness, or if being vulnerable has always made you feel unsafe, then you may have survived by creating a perfect-looking life - a life where you appear to be successful, engaged, and always there for others. The problem? You're filled with self-criticism and shame, and you can't allow yourself to express fear, anger, loss, or grief. You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly - only that you feel trapped and alone. If this sounds like you, you may have perfectly hidden depression (PHD).
With this compassionate guide, you'll begin the process of understanding your perfectionism, identifying destructive beliefs, and connecting with emotions suppressed for far too long. You'll also find tangible tips for quieting that critical inner voice, and powerful strategies for coping with difficult feelings. Most importantly, you'll learn that asking for help isn't a sign of weakness, but a sign of strength. If you're ready to stop hiding and start healing, this groundbreaking book will guide you - every imperfect step of the way.
©2019 Margaret Robinson Rutherford, PhD and Jennifer Marshall (P)2020 New Harbinger PublicationsRelated to this topic
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Game Changer
- By Christina on 12-01-22
By: Clarissa W. Ong PhD, and others
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I Thought It Was Just Me (but it isn’t)
- Telling the Truth about Perfectionism, Inadequacy, and Power
- By: Brené Brown
- Narrated by: Lauren Fortgang
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on seven years of ground-breaking research and hundreds of interviews, I Thought It Was Just Me shines a long-overdue light on an important truth: Our imperfections are what connect us to each other and to our humanity. Our vulnerabilities are not weaknesses; they are powerful reminders to keep our hearts and minds open to the reality that we're all in this together.
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I'm sure its great if you are a mother ....
- By Leslie A Hill on 08-09-11
By: Brené Brown
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The Undervalued Self
- By: Elaine N. Aron
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Salon Finished Dawn on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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The Codependency Recovery Plan
- A 5-Step Guide to Understand, Accept, and Break Free from the Codependent Cycle
- By: Krystal Mazzola M.Ed LMFT
- Narrated by: Linda Henning
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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You can say no. You can stop people-pleasing and start setting boundaries. You can ask for what you need. You can love and be loved - without sacrifice - by breaking the codependency cycle. The Codependency Recovery Plan empowers you to have healthy, happy interdependent relationships. This actionable five-step program is designed to help you get in touch with yourself, assert boundaries, and communicate confidently. You’ll be free to nurture true intimacy.
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Great content, audio not for the neurodiverse
- By Danielle A on 01-30-23
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Hardcore Self Help: F**k Depression
- By: Robert Duff
- Narrated by: Robert Duff
- Length: 4 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Hardcore Self Help: F**k Depression is the follow-up to the best-selling F**K Anxiety. In this book I take the information, tips, and insights that I have gained as a psychologist and translate them into language that doesn't suck. This is the self-help book for people who don't usually like self-help books. In Hardcore Self Help: F**K Depression, I talk to you like a friend. That means I speak directly to you, without psychobabble. Instead I tell you why your brain is such a troll.
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beginner level help
- By JAF on 08-15-17
By: Robert Duff
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Internal Family Systems Therapy, Second Edition
- By: Richard C. Schwartz, Martha Sweezy
- Narrated by: Brian Arens
- Length: 12 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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IFS reveals how the subpersonalities or parts of each individual's psyche relate to each other like members of a family, and how - just as in a family - polarization among parts can lead to emotional suffering. IFS originator Richard Schwartz and master clinician Martha Sweezy explain core concepts and provide practical guidelines for implementing IFS with clients who are struggling with trauma, anxiety, depression, eating disorders, addiction, and other behavioral problems.
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Internal Family Systems Therapy - Novice review
- By Jacqui on 12-30-20
By: Richard C. Schwartz, and others
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No Bad Parts
- Healing Trauma and Restoring Wholeness with the Internal Family Systems Model
- By: Richard C. Schwartz PhD, Alanis Morissette - foreword introduction
- Narrated by: Charlie Mechling
- Length: 8 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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Dr. Schwartz’s Internal Family Systems (IFS) model has been transforming psychology for decades. With No Bad Parts, you’ll learn why IFS has been so effective in areas such as trauma recovery, addiction therapy, and depression treatment - and how this new understanding of consciousness has the potential to radically change our lives.
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Superb content, but painful dramatizations
- By January on 12-02-21
By: Richard C. Schwartz PhD, and others
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You Are Only Just Beginning
- Lessons for the Journey Ahead
- By: Morgan Harper Nichols
- Narrated by: Morgan Nichols
- Length: 2 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Popular Instagram poet and bestselling author Morgan Harper Nichols reimagines the classic heroine's journey—from the very first call to adventure, through trials, hardships, and new relationships, all the way back home—and offers key lessons and affirmations to encourage and equip you every step of the way.
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Poignant reminders
- By Christa Lynn Van Eerde on 02-21-23
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Set Boundaries, Find Peace
- A Guide to Reclaiming Yourself
- By: Nedra Glover Tawwab
- Narrated by: Nedra Glover Tawwab
- Length: 8 hrs
- Unabridged
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Healthy boundaries. We all know we should have them - in order to achieve work/life balance, cope with toxic people, and enjoy rewarding relationships with partners, friends, and family. But what do "healthy boundaries" really mean - and how can we successfully express our needs, say "no", and be assertive without offending others? Licensed counselor, sought-after relationship expert, and one of the most influential therapists on Instagram Nedra Glover Tawwab demystifies this complex topic for today's world.
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Your Opinion is the Only Valid One
- By c on 05-13-21
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Depression, Anxiety, and Other Things We Don't Want to Talk About
- A Hopeful Christian Guide to Understanding and Discussing Mental Health
- By: Ryan Casey Waller
- Narrated by: Ryan Casey Waller
- Length: 6 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Mental illness loves to tell lies. One of those lies is that you really should be able to manage what you're struggling with. Pastor and psychotherapist Ryan Casey Waller says no. Mental health issues are not a symptom of a spiritual failing or insufficient faith; rather, suffering is the very thing our Savior seeks to heal as he leads us toward restoration. And yet, as Waller has experienced personally, the battle can be lonely and discouraging. But it doesn't have to be.
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So insightful, helpful, and comforting!
- By Stephanie Cottrill on 01-02-22
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The Upward Spiral
- Using Neuroscience to Reverse the Course of Depression, One Small Change at a Time
- By: Alex Korb PhD.
- Narrated by: David deVries
- Length: 5 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Depression can feel like a downward spiral, pulling you down into a vortex of sadness, fatigue, and apathy. Based in the latest research in neuroscience, this audiobook offers dozens of little things you can do every day to rewire your brain and create an upward spiral towardsa happier, healthier life.
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Practical & Positive
- By Sara on 07-05-15
By: Alex Korb PhD.
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Healthy Brain, Happy Life
- A Personal Program to Activate Your Brain and Do Everything Better
- By: Wendy Suzuki, Billie Fitzpatrick
- Narrated by: Wendy Suzuki
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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A neuroscientist transforms the way we think about our brains, our health, and our personal happiness in this clear, informative, and inspiring guide - a blend of personal memoir, science narrative, and immediately useful takeaways that bring the human brain into focus as never before, revealing the powerful connection between exercise, learning, memory, and cognitive abilities.
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Self-Satisfied, Self-Serving & Self-Centered
- By Sara on 12-29-15
By: Wendy Suzuki, and others
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The Gift of Failure
- How the Best Parents Learn to Let Go So Their Children Can Succeed
- By: Jessica Lahey
- Narrated by: Jessica Lahey
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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In the tradition of Paul Tough's How Children Succeed and Wendy Mogel's The Blessing of a Skinned Knee, this groundbreaking manifesto focuses on the critical school years when parents must learn to allow their children to experience the disappointment and frustration that occur from life's inevitable problems so that they can grow up to be successful, resilient, and self-reliant adults.
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Just Ok
- By MB34 on 12-18-19
By: Jessica Lahey
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Attached
- The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find—and Keep—Love
- By: Amir Levine, Rachel Heller
- Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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We already rely on science to tell us what to eat, when to exercise, and how long to sleep. Why not use science to help us improve our relationships? In this revolutionary book, psychiatrist and neuroscientist Dr. Amir Levine and Rachel Heller scientifically explain why some people seem to navigate relationships effortlessly, while others struggle.
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Good book - just not a good one for Audible
- By Mark on 02-01-20
By: Amir Levine, and others
What listeners say about Perfectly Hidden Depression
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- Anonymous User
- 06-09-20
Heartwarming
Both the writer and the narrator are excellent. It has been warming my soul listening to these two ladies, who, despite the serious work this journey requires, are able to plant bravery to the listener in a very gentle manner. I am glad I found this audiobook, thanks to one of my mistakes, showing me in itself, what perfection lies in imperfection ;).
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- Seija
- 02-12-23
Very meaningful for a specific audience
The author has identified and clearly communicates about a specific sort of mental malady, where perfectionism and dismissing your own self - needs, feelings - becomes a coping strategy to deal with life when more healthy ones have been insufficient or not available. I was one to suffer from this, and rhe descriptions are so very familiar. I read a lot of self-help around the subject and this book is by far the most accurate. I heartily recommend.
My only concern is that I am not at all sure if I had recognized myself or had been able to benefit from the book before my therapy. The thought patterns were so automatic and so out of sight for myself. But this book certainly would have made me think, and possibly nudge me to get the help I needed, if I had encountered it before the events that forced me to do it.
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- Bill Weaver
- 06-01-20
Comprehensive & Well Written
Are you hard on yourself, with a driven, and determined personality, but you simultaneously struggle by being sad, anxious, and worried? This informative guide could help to lead you towards a much happier life. Find out if you have a hidden perfectionist trait that is causing you unhappiness. Learn solutions to a more satisfactory, happier and fulfilling life. I gained self-insights, and highly recommend this book.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Amazon Customer
- 01-24-21
informative
This book provided me with a lot of information that helped, and answered many question that I had regarding depression.
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- czarina
- 10-16-20
This book can save lives
I like how this book was so clear and easy to understand. There are some very helpful activities in here that will help build insight whether you are a clinician or an individual who thinks you’re struggling with perfectly hidden depression. This book differentiates perfectly hidden depression from all other disorders. It’s a great book for anyone to read.
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- SLM
- 12-28-21
Perfect for me
I struggled at first and laid this book aside. Picked it up about a year later, just finished it and realize it is exactly what I need. I am going to dig in and do the work in the reflections, as I wanted to read it through first.
Thank you Dr. Margaret for a well written book and for being open about your struggles with PHD. I do feel better just reading this book. I look forward to more healing with the work I will do in journaling my reflections.
I encourage anyone to read this book that even suspects they might be a perfectionist.
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- Sim
- 05-12-23
To the point
This book may have literally saved my sanity. It was a timely listen at a point I needed a name for what I’d been feeling for years.
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- Kimberly Davis
- 10-27-20
Amazing
What fulfillment and healing this has brought me! I’ve been listening to your podcasts for years breaking the cycle of abuse and seeing my worth thank you from the depth of my soul Dr. Rutherford!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 01-15-22
Very helpful
The journey of healing is long but this book defiantly showed me where the problem started in my life and exposed the roots of the destructive behavior that looked very normal to me
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- Anonymous User
- 01-02-25
Helped me with learning how to process my emotions
This is definitely a workbook. Every chapter requires you to journal. However, I found the book to be very knowledgeable and helpful. I would listen to it again.
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