Shift
Managing Your Emotions—So They Don't Manage You
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Narrated by:
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Ethan Kross
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By:
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Ethan Kross
About this listen
“A revolutionary guide to mastering your emotional life.”—Charles Duhigg
“Brilliant, engaging, and deeply insightful.”—Lisa Damour
“Breaks new ground.”—Adam Grant
“Illuminating.”—Publishers Weekly (starred review)
A myth-busting science-based guide that addresses the timeless question of how to manage your emotional life using tools you already possess—from the bestselling author of Chatter.
Whether it’s anxiety about going to the doctor, boiling rage when we’re stuck in traffic, or devastation after a painful break-up, our lives are filled with situations that send us spiraling. But as difficult as our emotions can be, they are also a superpower. Far from being “good” or “bad,” emotions are information. When they’re activated in the right ways and at the right time, they function like an immune system, alerting us to our surroundings, telling us how to react to a situation, and helping us make the right choices.
But how do we make our emotions work for us rather than against us? Acclaimed psychologist Dr. Ethan Kross has devoted his scientific career to answering this question. In Shift, he dispels common myths—for instance, that avoidance is always toxic or that we should always strive to live in the moment—and provides a new framework for shifting our emotions so they don’t take over our lives.
Shift weaves groundbreaking research with riveting stories of people struggling and succeeding to manage their emotions—from a mother whose fear prompted her to make a spur-of-the-moment decision that would save her daughter’s life mid-flight to a nuclear code-carrying Navy SEAL who learned how to embrace both joy and pain during a hellish training activity. Dr. Kross spotlights a wide array of tools that we already have access to—in our bodies and minds, our relationships with other people, and the cultures and physical spaces we inhabit—and shows us how to harness them to be healthier and more successful.
Filled with actionable advice, cutting-edge research, and riveting stories, Shift puts the power back into our hands, so we can control our emotions without them controlling us—and help others do the same.
©2025 Ethan Kross (P)2025 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“[Shift] puts the problem of overreaction in a new light.”—The New Yorker
“Illuminating . . . this will be a boon to readers looking to take better charge of their inner lives.”—Publishers Weekly, starred review
“This book does much more than make sense of emotions—it breaks new ground on how to manage them. Ethan Kross has done something remarkable: he’s written a page-turner that’s grounded in science and filled with practical insights. If you think you can’t control what you feel, he’s about to make you think twice.”—Adam Grant, #1 New York Times bestselling author of Think Again and host of the podcast Re:Thinking
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-
Story
For many people, a good life is a stable life, a comfortable life that follows a well-trodden path. This is the case for Shigehiro Oishi's father, who has lived in a small mountain town in Japan for his entire life, putting his family's needs above his own, like his father and grandfather before him. But is a happy life, or even a meaningful life, the only path to a good life? In Life in Three Dimensions, Shige Oishi enters into a debate that has animated psychology since 1984, when Ed Diener (Oishi's mentor) published a paper that launched happiness studies.
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Ping
- The Secrets of Successful Virtual Communication
- By: Andrew Brodsky
- Narrated by: Sean Patrick Hopkins
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Despite our increasing reliance on communication technology for our work, until now, there has been no guide for navigating it. Which brings us to Ping. In this accessible book for workers of all stripes—remote, hybrid, and those who work fully in person, yet use communication technologies as part of their jobs—Brodsky dives into the big questions we all have: Which communication modes are the best for which situations? How can we interact most productively and authentically? How do we build relationships at a distance? How can we increase workplace inclusion using these technologies?
By: Andrew Brodsky
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Validation
- How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life
- By: Caroline Fleck
- Narrated by: Caroline Fleck
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
We all spend a lot of energy trying to get the people in our lives to listen to us, and despite our best efforts, we often fail. But what if the secret to influencing others was to demonstrate acceptance? Enter validation—communication that one is mindful, understands, and empathizes with another person's experience, thereby accepting it as valid. As both a means and an end, validation has profound effects, from improving relationships and de-escalating conflicts to increasing our ability to generate self-compassion and help people change their behavior.
By: Caroline Fleck
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Chatter
- The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It
- By: Ethan Kross
- Narrated by: Ethan Kross
- Length: 5 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Tell a stranger that you talk to yourself, and you’re likely to get written off as eccentric. But the truth is that we all have a voice in our head. When we talk to ourselves, we often hope to tap into our inner coach but find our inner critic instead. When we’re facing a tough task, our inner coach can buoy us up: Focus - you can do this. But, just as often, our inner critic sinks us entirely: I’m going to fail. They’ll all laugh at me. What’s the use?
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Chatter is Great
- By Mark on 02-13-21
By: Ethan Kross
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Reset
- How to Change What's Not Working
- By: Dan Heath
- Narrated by: Dan Heath
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In Reset, Heath explores a framework for getting unstuck and making the changes that matter. The secret is to find “leverage points”: places where a little bit of effort can yield a disproportionate return. Then, we can thoughtfully rearrange our resources to push on those points.
By: Dan Heath
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Calling In
- By: Loretta J Ross
- Narrated by: Loretta J Ross
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
From a pioneering Black feminist and MacArthur “Genius” Fellow, an urgent and exhilarating memoir-manifesto-handbook about how to rein in the excesses of cancel culture so we can truly communicate and solve problems together.
By: Loretta J Ross
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Life in Three Dimensions
- How Curiosity, Exploration, and Experience Make a Fuller, Better Life
- By: Shigehiro Oishi PhD
- Narrated by: Brian Nishii
- Length: 7 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
-
Story
For many people, a good life is a stable life, a comfortable life that follows a well-trodden path. This is the case for Shigehiro Oishi's father, who has lived in a small mountain town in Japan for his entire life, putting his family's needs above his own, like his father and grandfather before him. But is a happy life, or even a meaningful life, the only path to a good life? In Life in Three Dimensions, Shige Oishi enters into a debate that has animated psychology since 1984, when Ed Diener (Oishi's mentor) published a paper that launched happiness studies.
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Ping
- The Secrets of Successful Virtual Communication
- By: Andrew Brodsky
- Narrated by: Sean Patrick Hopkins
- Length: 8 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Despite our increasing reliance on communication technology for our work, until now, there has been no guide for navigating it. Which brings us to Ping. In this accessible book for workers of all stripes—remote, hybrid, and those who work fully in person, yet use communication technologies as part of their jobs—Brodsky dives into the big questions we all have: Which communication modes are the best for which situations? How can we interact most productively and authentically? How do we build relationships at a distance? How can we increase workplace inclusion using these technologies?
By: Andrew Brodsky
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Validation
- How the Skill Set That Revolutionized Psychology Will Transform Your Relationships, Increase Your Influence, and Change Your Life
- By: Caroline Fleck
- Narrated by: Caroline Fleck
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
We all spend a lot of energy trying to get the people in our lives to listen to us, and despite our best efforts, we often fail. But what if the secret to influencing others was to demonstrate acceptance? Enter validation—communication that one is mindful, understands, and empathizes with another person's experience, thereby accepting it as valid. As both a means and an end, validation has profound effects, from improving relationships and de-escalating conflicts to increasing our ability to generate self-compassion and help people change their behavior.
By: Caroline Fleck
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Chatter
- The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It
- By: Ethan Kross
- Narrated by: Ethan Kross
- Length: 5 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Tell a stranger that you talk to yourself, and you’re likely to get written off as eccentric. But the truth is that we all have a voice in our head. When we talk to ourselves, we often hope to tap into our inner coach but find our inner critic instead. When we’re facing a tough task, our inner coach can buoy us up: Focus - you can do this. But, just as often, our inner critic sinks us entirely: I’m going to fail. They’ll all laugh at me. What’s the use?
-
-
Chatter is Great
- By Mark on 02-13-21
By: Ethan Kross
-
Reset
- How to Change What's Not Working
- By: Dan Heath
- Narrated by: Dan Heath
- Length: 6 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
In Reset, Heath explores a framework for getting unstuck and making the changes that matter. The secret is to find “leverage points”: places where a little bit of effort can yield a disproportionate return. Then, we can thoughtfully rearrange our resources to push on those points.
By: Dan Heath
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Calling In
- By: Loretta J Ross
- Narrated by: Loretta J Ross
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
From a pioneering Black feminist and MacArthur “Genius” Fellow, an urgent and exhilarating memoir-manifesto-handbook about how to rein in the excesses of cancel culture so we can truly communicate and solve problems together.
By: Loretta J Ross
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Make Work Fair
- Data-Driven Design for Real Results
- By: Iris Bohnet, Siri Chilazi
- Narrated by: Laurel Lefkow
- Length: 12 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
To make organizations more fair, many well-meaning individuals and companies invest their time and resources in diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) initiatives. But because inequity is built into the structures, processes, and environments of our workplaces, adding these programs has been ineffective and often becomes a burden passed off to the individuals they are meant to help. In Make Work Fair, behavioral scientist and author of What Works Iris Bohnet and gender expert Siri Chilazi offer data-backed, actionable solutions that build fairness into the very fabric of the workplace.
By: Iris Bohnet, and others
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Outraged
- Why We Fight About Morality and Politics and How to Find Common Ground
- By: Kurt Gray
- Narrated by: David Marantz
- Length: 13 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It’s easy to assume that liberals and conservatives have radically different moral foundations. In Outraged, Kurt Gray showcases the latest science to demonstrate that we all have the same moral mind—that everyone’s moral judgments stem from feeling threatened or vulnerable to harm, and provides a captivating new explanation for our moral outrage, and unpacks how to best bridge divides. If you want to understand the morals of the “other side,” ask yourself a simple question—what harms do they see?
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Harmed and dangerous
- By homerh on 01-19-25
By: Kurt Gray
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Defy
- The Power of No in a World That Demands Yes
- By: Dr. Sunita Sah
- Narrated by: Dr. Sunita Sah
- Length: 8 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Many of us comply much more than we realize. How many times have you wanted to object, disagree, or opt out of something but ended up swallowing your words, shaking your head, and just going along? Analyzing cases ranging from corporate corruption and sexual abuse to everyday acquiescence at work, the doctor’s office, and in our personal lives, award-winning organizational psychologist Dr. Sunita Sah delves deep into why the pressure to comply is a corrosive and often invisible force in our society.
By: Dr. Sunita Sah
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Superagency
- What Could Possibly Go Right with Our AI Future
- By: Reid Hoffman, Greg Beato
- Narrated by: Scott Wallace
- Length: 7 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Superagency offers a roadmap for using AI inclusively and adaptively to improve our lives and create positive change. While acknowledging challenges like disinformation and potential job changes, the book focuses on AI’s immense potential to increase individual agency and create better outcomes for society as a whole. Imagine AI tutors personalizing education for each child, researchers rapidly discovering cures for diseases like Alzheimer's and cancer, and AI advisors empowering people to navigate complex systems and achieve their goals
By: Reid Hoffman, and others
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Secrets of Adulthood
- Simple Truths for Our Complex Lives
- By: Gretchen Rubin
- Narrated by: Gretchen Rubin
- Length: 2 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The right idea, invoked at the right time, can change our lives. Drawing from her long studies of happiness, and also from the challenges she’s faced herself, writer Gretchen Rubin has discovered the “Secrets of Adulthood” that can help us manage the complexities of life. To convey her conclusions, she turned to the aphorism—the ancient literary discipline that demands that a writer convey a large truth in a few words.
By: Gretchen Rubin
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You Are Not Your Brain
- The 4-Step Solution for Changing Bad Habits, Ending Unhealthy Thinking, and Taking Control of Your Life
- By: Jeffrey Schwartz MD, Rebecca Gladding MD
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A leading neuroplasticity researcher and the coauthor of the groundbreaking books Brain Lock and The Mind and the Brain, Jeffrey M. Schwartz has spent his career studying the structure and neuronal firing patterns of the human brain. He pioneered the first mindfulness-based treatment program for people suffering from OCD, teaching patients how to achieve long-term relief from their compulsions. In You Are Not Your Brain, Schwartz and Gladding carefully outline their program.
By: Jeffrey Schwartz MD, and others
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Who Better than You?
- The Art of Healthy Arrogance & Dreaming Big
- By: Will Packer
- Narrated by: Will Packer, Regina Hall, Kevin Hart, and others
- Length: 9 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
You know Will Packer’s movies. From Stomp the Yard to Ride Along to Girls Trip, his films have collectively grossed more than $1 billion at the box office, with ten opening at number one! To outsiders, the unabashed confidence that has driven him since his college days—when he was trying to sell a micro-budget indie film—may look like arrogance. To Packer, that’s just what it took to make it on his own terms. With Who Better Than You?, Packer has created the success toolkit he wished he’d had back then.
By: Will Packer
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Inspire
- The Universal Path for Leading Yourself and Others
- By: Adam Galinsky
- Narrated by: Will Damron
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Social psychologist and leadership expert Adam Galinsky has spent three decades building a method for determining when we are inspiring versus infuriating, and where various leaders—presidents, CEOs, coaches, teachers, parents, and a wealth of others—currently land on that spectrum. Galinsky shows how inspiring leaders can fill us with a wellspring of hope and possibility as they guide us to become better versions of ourselves. In contrast, infuriating leaders disappoint and annoy, fueling seething cauldrons of rage.
By: Adam Galinsky
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The DOSE Effect
- Optimize Your Brain and Body by Boosting Your Dopamine, Oxytocin, Serotonin, and Endorphins
- By: TJ Power
- Narrated by: Tj Power
- Length: 11 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The brain’s ability to change and adapt is one of the most powerful tools we can harness to improve our lives. Renowned neuroscientist and co-founder of Neurify, Tj Power, believes in the human ability to optimize and rewire brain chemistry to unlock one’s full potential. However, to do so, one must first implement a series of practical, life-changing strategies. The DOSE Effect reveals the secrets of our brain chemistry, offering simple and accessible ways to make modifications to your lifestyle that can transform your brain.
By: TJ Power
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28-Day CBT Workbook for Adults
- A Straightforward Guide to Start Rewiring Your Brain in 15 Minutes a Day—With Proven Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Techniques for Anxiety, Depression, & Self-Esteem
- By: Calvin Caufield
- Narrated by: Kyle Ouellette
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Living with anxiety, depression or struggling with low self worth can feel like you’re constantly exhausted. Like the challenges of everyday life just leave you depleted. Over time it gets easier to feel trapped by these feelings, and trapped by the automatic negative thoughts they create. But what if it wasn’t just our feelings that caused our thoughts, it was our thoughts that caused our feelings? This question is the core of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, one of the most widely researched and evidence backed therapies available today.
By: Calvin Caufield
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Protocols
- An Operating Manual for the Human Body
- By: Andrew D. Huberman Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Andrew D. Huberman Ph.D.
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Dr. Andrew Huberman, host of the world’s leading health podcast, Huberman Lab, and neuroscientist and tenured professor at Stanford School of Medicine, introduces Protocols, an essential guide to improving brain function, enhancing mood and energy, optimizing bodily health and physical performance, and rewiring your nervous system to learn new skills and behaviors that can transform your life.
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The Highly Sensitive
- How to Find Inner Peace, Develop Your Gifts, and Thrive
- By: Judy Dyer
- Narrated by: Angela Juarez
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In The Highly Sensitive, you will realize why high sensitivity is a gift that requires careful management. You will discover how to solve the common problems faced by HSPs the world over and how to live a happy, fulfilling life that lets you use your abilities to the fullest.
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Ai voice sounding
- By jeff g ginter on 11-30-24
By: Judy Dyer