Rethinking Narcissism
The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
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Narrated by:
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Kiff VandenHeuvel
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By:
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Dr. Craig Malkin
About this listen
Harvard Medical School psychologist and Huffington Post blogger Craig Malkin addresses the "narcissism epidemic" by illuminating the spectrum of narcissism, identifying ways to control the trait, and explaining how too little of it may be a bad thing.
"What is narcissism?" is one of the fastest rising searches on Google, and articles on the topic routinely go viral. Yet, the word narcissist seems to mean something different every time it's uttered. People hurl the word as an insult at anyone who offends them. It's become so ubiquitous, in fact, that it's lost any clear meaning. The only certainty these days is that it's bad to be a narcissist - really bad - inspiring the same kind of roiling queasiness we feel when we hear the word sexist or racist. That's especially troubling news for millennials, the people born after 1980, who've been branded the "most narcissistic generation ever".
In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self. On the far end lies sociopathy. Malkin deconstructs the healthy from the unhealthy narcissism and offers clear, step-by-step guidance on how to promote healthy narcissism in our partners, our children, and ourselves.
©2015 Craig Malkin (P)2015 HarperCollins PublishersListeners also enjoyed...
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- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The summer Lisa A. Phillips turned 30, she fell in love with someone who didn't return her feelings. She soon became obsessed. She followed him around, called him compulsively, and talked about him endlessly. One desperate morning, after she snuck into his apartment building, he picked up a baseball bat to protect himself and began to dial 911. Her unrequited love had changed her from a sane, conscientious college teacher and radio reporter into someone she barely recognized.
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Great book! So-so narrator....
- By ToluGrace on 04-14-15
By: Lisa A. Phillips
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When Friendship Hurts
- How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You
- By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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We’ve all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships. Finally there is help. In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them - or end them.
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Boring and patronizing
- By KDS on 11-17-22
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How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
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Overall
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Performance
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Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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The Available Parent
- Expert Advice for Raising Successful and Resilient Teens and Tweens
- By: John Duffy
- Narrated by: David Colacci
- Length: 5 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
We have a tendency today to over-parent, micromanage, and underappreciate our adolescents. Dr. John Duffy's The Available Parent is a revolutionary approach to taking care of teens and tweens. The available parent of a teenager is open to discussion, offering advice and solutions but not insisting on them. He allows his child to make some mistakes, setting limits, primarily where health and safety are concerned. He never lectures - he is available but not controlling. He is neither cruel nor dismissive, ever....
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Parenting teens can be much less stressful!
- By Kathi on 06-12-14
By: John Duffy
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Strong Mothers, Strong Sons
- Lessons Mothers Need to Raise Extraordinary Men
- By: Meg Meeker
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 12 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
From the moment a mother holds her newborn son, his eyes tell her that she is his world. But often, as he grows up, the boy who needs her simultaneously pushes her away. Calling upon thirty years of experience as a pediatrician, Meg Meeker, MD, a highly sought-after national speaker, assistant professor of clinical medicine, and mother of four, shares the secrets that every mother needs to know in order to strengthen-or rebuild-her relationship with her son.
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Update of wording in your book is required
- By danamc on 08-27-18
By: Meg Meeker
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Parenting Without Power Struggles
- Raising Joyful, Resilient Kids While Staying Cool, Calm, and Connected
- By: Susan Stiffelman
- Narrated by: Susan Stiffelman
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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While most parenting programs are designed to coerce kids to change, Parenting Without Power Struggles does something innovative, showing you how to help your children awaken their natural instincts to cooperate, rather than employing threats or bribes, which inevitably fuels their resistance. By staying calm and being the confident "captain of the ship" your child needs, you will learn how to parent from a place of strong, durable connection, and you'll be better able to help your kids navigate the challenging moments of growing up.
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Highly recommended.
- By Nothing really matters on 10-13-13
By: Susan Stiffelman
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For Parents Only
- Getting Inside the Head of Your Kid
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn, Lisa Author Rice
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 3 hrs and 32 mins
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What parent hasn't occasionally looked at their beloved but bewildering offspring and wondered, what in the world is he thinking, or why is my sweet little girl acting like that? In this remarkable audiobook, Shaunti Feldhahn and Lisa Rice take you inside the mind of teens and preteens through the same innovative approach that seized national attention in the best-selling book For Women Only, For Men Only, and For Young Women Only.
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great points, extremely Christian
- By Kimiko Carpenter on 05-25-22
By: Shaunti Feldhahn, and others
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To Have and to Hold
- Motherhood, Marriage, and the Modern Dilemma
- By: Molly Millwood
- Narrated by: Molly Millwood
- Length: 9 hrs and 1 min
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
A clinical psychologist’s exploration of the modern dilemmas women face in the wake of new motherhood. When Molly Millwood became a mother, she was fully prepared for what she would gain: an adorable baby boy; hard-won mothering skills; and a messy, chaotic, beautiful life. But what she did not expect was what she would lose: aspects of her identity, a baseline level of happiness, a general sense of well-being.
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Pretty good
- By C Sandell on 03-07-21
By: Molly Millwood
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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Us
- Getting Past You & Me to Build a More Loving Relationship
- By: Terrence Real
- Narrated by: Terrence Real, Bruce Springsteen
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
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At a time when toxic individualism is rending our society at every level, bestselling author and renowned marriage counselor Terrence Real sees how it poisons intimate relationships in his therapy practice, where he works with couples on the brink of disaster. The good news: Warmer, closer, more passionate relationships are possible if you have the right tools. In his transformative new book Us, Real brilliantly observes how our winner-takes-all culture infiltrates families with devastating results.
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I preferred Fierce Intimacy
- By Jose on 06-23-22
By: Terrence Real
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Finally
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THE best book I’ve ever read on the subject
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The Narcissist in Your Life
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Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) has a profoundly dehumanizing effect on those subject to its distortions, manipulations, and rage. The Narcissist in Your Life illuminates the emotionally annihilating experience of narcissistic abuse in families and relationships, acknowledges the complex emotional and physical trauma that results, and assists survivors with compassionate, practical advice on the path of recovery.
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Exceptional Read
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Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me
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Those who are in the unenviable position of living or working with a narcissist have learned by sad trial and error that they are the only one in the relationship who can change the dynamic. Certainly narcissists don't think they need to change. Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me is a hands-on resource for helping colleagues, families, and spouses deal with people who exhibit narcissistic tendencies by learning how to change their own attitudes and responses.
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Religious interpretation was unwelcome
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It's Not You
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It’s not always easy to tell when you’re dealing with a narcissist. One day they draw you in with their confidence and charisma, the next they gaslight you, wreck your self-confidence, and leave you wondering, What could I have done differently? As Dr. Ramani Durvasula reveals in It's Not You, the answer is: absolutely nothing. Just as a tiger can’t change its stripes, a narcissist won’t stop manipulating and invalidating you. To heal in the aftermath of their abuse and protect yourself from future harm, you first have to accept that you are not to blame.
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I needed this
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What listeners say about Rethinking Narcissism
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Jill
- 10-02-15
A timely and practical book
I'm a clinical psychologist who works with many "Echos and Narcissists" in my psychotherapy practice. This book's spectrum approach to understanding narcissism is positive and well explained. Dr Malkin's writing is clear and approachable without being technically dense or overly simplistic. The narration of this audio book couldn't have been more perfect. And I didn't catch a single mispronunciation in the entire narration, always a pleasure. I will definitely be recommending this book to many of my clients.
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- Holistic_Practitioner
- 01-19-20
Great dive into rediscovering narcissism
Absolutely loved it. Learned so much about myself and those around me. Wonderful narration also!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-02-17
Excellent exploration of healthy and unhealthy pre
Excellent exploration of healthy and unhealthy presentations of narcissism. The narrator is engaging as well.
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- Courtenay Veenis
- 02-02-19
Top of its category many categories actually
I cannot remember the last time I finished a book reading visually or listening where I had to say to myself throughout the process especially towards the last few chapters I had to stop and say oh my gosh wait who is this guy again even though I know exactly who he is I have been engaging online with YouTube ever since my 1st real paradigm/existential breakdown after some very a some very borderline psychopathic or pathological personalities in my life... I am no longer saying covert narcissism because I was listening to the fact that this is not a medical or a legitimate term to be using. I am using my Bluetooth to say this also I apologize for the lack of punctuation and if you could just meet me in the middle and forgive me for I just genuinely don't wanna forget or put off for a minute my experience with this book it is a Self Help book I guess technically by every sentence is literally poignant and terse and intelligent and also thoughtful and well just simply useful I wish I could speak to so many individuals about this book right now and run to them but I'm going to tame the Echo and just process on my own. I'm crying a little bit now thank you for this book.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Laurie A. Helgoe
- 06-25-17
Well researched, well written, and well read
Dr. Malkin's discussion of narcissism is humanizing, accessible, and practical. It is too easy to portray narcissists as caricatures, feeding the very dynamic that reinforces the problem. Malkin helps us see the human in narcissism, and the versions of narcissism (or problematic lack of) that all of us contend with, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse. A comprehensive and generous work.
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- Erin Brzykcy
- 05-03-17
Objective Explanation of Narcissism
I like how Narcissism was explained on a spectrum, including "healthy narcissism". I appreciated the positive research and the explanation of addiction. I especially enjoyed the chapter on parenting.
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- Mary Robinson
- 03-28-21
The book Gave me a new perspective
The book starts with the premise that we are all narcissists at some level from healthy to unhealthy, which altered my view on life and other people in a healthy new way.
I also like the voice of the speaker. The speaker is as important as the words that are spoken. If I can’t tolerate listening to the voice, then it becomes difficult to receive the information by the author.
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- Amazon Customer
- 05-17-23
Love the spectrum
Dr. Malkin talks about how narcissism is a spectrum and too little narcissism is just as bad as too much. I agree. In a way, the book gave me permission to enjoy public speaking and to continue having the desire to be an influencer. While, at the same time, it provided me guidance on how to avoid harming others with my desire to feel special. We’re all special. And I can be special in my own way without stealing the spotlight or putting someone else down to retain my need to be special. I can allow other people to hold the spotlight and be special without it ruining my self image.
I’m not an extreme narcissist, but I would say my narcissistic traits are higher than normal. I’d probably be a 7 on his scale. I’m not quite healthy. I still have things to work on. But, I was grateful Dr. Malkin didn’t say that all narcissism was bad. I was feeling like I needed to either throw caution to the wind and embrace being an extreme narcissist or give up my career aspirations as unhealthy fantasies. It’s nice to know that I can strive for a healthy medium and keep finding joy in my career goals without harming others.
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- Jonathan
- 07-11-17
more true perspective of understanding narcissism
very much appreciated this understanding View of narcissism in general, but also in light of narcissistic personality disorder. Would have loved to see some expounding on cluster personality traits as some of those were a parent in some of the examples given, but that probably would have had to reprioritize other aspects out of the book. overall, very very good. I'm glad to have read it!
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- Merle B
- 05-27-19
A Highly Informative Book on Narcissism
This book was a bit of a surprise, as I didn't expect it to be as good as it was. I have read quite a few books on the narcissism spectrum, and found that this one was one of the clearest explainers on healthy and unhealthy narcissism. It's a short and easy read. I highly recommend it.
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