Tropical Hazard: Oh Sh*t! Cobalins Can't Swim! Audiobook By Dustin Tigner cover art

Tropical Hazard: Oh Sh*t! Cobalins Can't Swim!

Arachnomancer, Book 3

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Tropical Hazard: Oh Sh*t! Cobalins Can't Swim!

By: Dustin Tigner
Narrated by: Qarie Marshall
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About this listen

In a village of lazy, good-for-nothing Cobalins, one manly man—a true studly stud—stands above them all: the great, the powerful, the King of…Knock.

(Desley palms her forehead. You no be King of Shadows! Now we have to start over. Cobalins groan.)

The terrible Army of Light knows the secret location of Dedu Tedu Novus. War is here. There's absolutely no avoiding it.

Or is there?

Naturally, Dhane does the most unthinkable thing: employs an impromptu plan, his favorite type. It's dangerous, it's crazy, and it embarks them on a new adventure where it rains every day and the problems don't stop.

Can he save his village? Can he convince Challenger Sarah to help? Or is he only putting off the inevitable, the point where the Changed Reditai turn all those of Shadow into stone for their mysterious plans?

Tropical Hazard is the third installment in the hilarious—and sometimes serious—Arachnomancer series. Travel to a new zone, see the world, and eat spider tacos. Octoralis glares. Or… umm… don't. Don't do that last thing.

Notice: Arachnomancer was rated M for mature by a team of immature Cobalins. Listen at your own risk.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2024 Dustin Tigner (P)2024 Dreamscape Lore
Fantasy Humorous Witty Funny

What listeners say about Tropical Hazard: Oh Sh*t! Cobalins Can't Swim!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Funny

Several moments had me laughing. The performance was great he did a really good job. Overall an enjoyable listen.

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    3 out of 5 stars

Frustrating potential

Mc is the cause of most of his own issues. Just simply having a decent conversation would solve a lot of them. His social awkwardness, the spider in his head constantly trying to get him laid, and the arachnophobia are all just overplayed to the point it gets annoying.

I get a little socially awkwardness being a "gamer" but when it leads a lot of your issues being drawn out for several chapters when it could have been solved in one. That just seems like unimaginative filler.

I actually like the concept of the Soul spider in his head giving commentary and I get it's trying to be comical. However it's way too often, the joke was funny the first five or six times, by the 50th time it just seems worn out.

Practically forgets his "phobia" most the time and that's just not how phobia's work. Either get over it or take a different path already.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

fun world!

I really like the world I this series! this book adds a whole new level of fun! looking forward to what's next!

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

Binge worthy, Rant worthy.

As soon as I finished this one, I had to look for any word on the next. The pacing kept making me lose track of real time and it never felt as long as it really was(which is a good thing in my mind.) A seriously binge worthy series and the VA does a great job of bringing everything to life, I could practically see the sunny beaches and hard battles in every word written or spoken (i frequently swapped between audible and kindle versions depending on what I was doing at the time.)

I truly can't wait to see what new series the author is cooking up while this world is in the background, but I'm certainly going to be binge reading that one too, I'm sure. I'm also certain that a few of my friends will be slapping me for getting them to burn even more credits they don't have earmarked when I recommend this series to them (one already has when I played a few favorite haha moments in the car)

Enough of my rambling. Go read the bloody thing. And keep on writing Author!

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    5 out of 5 stars
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Never fails to get a laugh

After unfortunately finishing the third book in this amazing series it pains me to realize that I no longer have any arachnomancer books to listen to, this travesty fills me with disappointment such as Octoralis is filled with at Dhane’s thwarting of her romantic plans.

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The whole book

I hope you finish this book series!! I read you weren't going to. Here's to hoping!!

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  • Overall
    3 out of 5 stars
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author gave up

so let me start by saying that if you are looking for something new or interesting from this book then turn back. the writing has the same pitfalls and the mc does the same old dumb mistakes and obvious dumb things repeatedly just like the other two books. "le sigh" (get it? it's funny if you use it enough hahahahahahahahahaha) no really he uses this multiple times per chapter and it gets really grating.

now to my review title. the author has publicly given up on the series and will not be writing any more in the series because he did not get enough sales (this is according to him). he claims to have repeatedly gone back and changed issues that the last book had so the new books would not have them. after listening to all the books back to back I can confidently say this author didn't listen to feedback or didn't bother trying to get angry feedback from previous books. the issues in the books are blatant to anyone who would listen to it.

most of the time the author just does not bother explaining things happening. like there is one point in the book where the mc is on another part of an island and without any explanation suddenly the mc is talking about watching his friends prepare for something (trying to not drop spoilers) from up close. o explanation on how or when they got there it is worded in such a way thay you assume it is only a few seconds of time difference.

same as the last books in the series the dumb things the mc does just do not make sense in any way. I remember quite a few different times just scratching my head as the mc did something wildly dumb or out of character that will/would have left friends or acquaintances exposed to the enemy without help or leave the mc in a horrible spot for no gain whatsoever. it's like you go shopping in a store for milk but oh no you forgot your wallet so instead of going to get your wallet you rob the store and make sure to be as conspicuous as possible doing it as well.

there are so many other issues as well but I just don't think this series deserves more said about it as the author seems to also not care enough to realize the constant pitfalls and issues he just keeps hitting.

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